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Contr Jokes

59 contr jokes and hilarious contr puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about contr that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Contr Short Jokes

Short contr jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The contr humour may include short ten jokes also.

  1. What do you call... What do you call it when a man who Hates games, cant stop playing side scrolling shooters?
    A contr-addiction
  2. Knock knock Who's there?
    A control freak
    Contr...
    Okay, now you say control freak who?

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Contr joke, Knock knock

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about contr can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of contr puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Giggle-Inducing Contr Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends

What funny jokes about contr you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean birth jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make contr prank.

If contraception is birth control...

... abortion is birth control-alt-delete.

Self control

I stopped a girl getting r**... today.
I used self-control.

There has been some controversy regarding priests delivering sermons using an iPad instead of the traditional bible.

I think its perfectly fine. After all, Moses delivered the ten commandments using two tablets.

The control for the air conditioner was so far away

It was not even remotely close

Contrary to popular belief, you actually CAN drink lava

but only once

This may be controversial to most people, but i feel it must be said. I FULLY support flying the rebel flag.

How else are we supposed to show our support and remembrance of the battle of Hoth, and our willingness to topple the empire and bring peace to the galaxy?

What is the best contraceptive for old people?

n**...

Contrary to popular belief, in Engineering, you do meet tons of women...

Just not very many

What contract does Mall-Santa sign?

A Santa Clause

If everyone contributes a small amount of their income...

Together we can pool the resources to defeat socialism.

If you don't use contraceptives.

Then you've got nuttin to worry about.

Contrary to popular criticism, Hillary doesn't s**....

If she does, Bill wouldn't have needed Monica.

Most Contradictory Inspirational Quote Ever?

"Follow Your Dreams."
-Freddy Kreuger, 2016

Everyone's a contrarian these days...

Well, except for me of course.

No control

I have no control. There is no escape. I don't even have a home.
I think I should get a knew keyboard.

Why is I such a controlling letter?

Because I said so.

Contrary to common belief, only 5.7 million Jews were killed during the Holocuast, for you see...

the n**... were known for rounding them up.

Help! My husband's too controlling!

The controversy surrounding Donald Trump and the Russian hacking of American voting machines is being blown way out of proportion...

who cares if Putin voted for him.

I can control sheep by just listening to them

It's true, I heard them with my own ears

How many contractors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I'll let you know when one of them calls me back.

How many contractors does it take to screw in a light blub?

None, it's a union job.

There are many contradictory statements like...

Pacifist mass m**..., Clinton keeping emails, and Apple is innovative.

What's the most controversial animal product?

A boar shin.

I won't control what you do on the internet

but Theresa May

I'm not a control freak.

But let me show you the right way to do that.

I often contradict myself

No, I don't.

I can't control my urination.

It's my #1 problem.

There was a controversial sale on music in lossless format.

I got a lot of FLAC from participating in it.

What do you contract from unprotected s**... with a c**...?

Gonor*yeeeeehaaaa!*

Contridiction

Autism Speaks

Hello and welcome to Contradictions Anonymous.

What's your name?

Who is the most controversial tv personality of all time?

Not sure, but I wouldn't sleep on Bill Cosby.

There has been some controversy lately...

...about what would happen if you put a lightsaber in water. Would it break? Would the water heat up or cool? Recent scientists have discovered the water will heat to about the internal temperature of a tauntaun...luke warm.

With all this controversy about being friend zoned made me nervous,so one day I bent down and hugged my best friend and told her I love her,and she

licked my face and wagged her tail!

Contrary to popular belief, I'm an optimist

I am confident that I'll die tomorrow

Controversial

Why don't white people get a white history month?
Answer: Because you typically don't give a participation trophy to the kid who got first place.

Contradicting Coronavirus advice!

First, we hear alcohol may prevent the virus... now research suggests the opposite. Then we're told heat and humidity has no effect, but wait... direct sunlight might quickly kill the virus. So, if you come across some elderly bloke, standing in the yard, intoxicated and n**..., leave me alone... I'm conducting important medical research.

Since I contracted Covid-19 our s**... life has been so much better

Seeing as I can't smell or taste.

Contrary to popular belief there was more s**... on the TV in the 50s and 60s than there is now.

Modern TVs can't support the weight.

control freak

me: knock knock
you: whos there?
me: control freak.....now this is the part where you say "control freak who?"

What did the contrarian rooster say?

Cockle-Doodle-Don't.

Contrary to popular beliefs, losing weight is a piece of cake.

Just don't pick it up.

Why can't contractors shoot each other with sealant?

Because caulk fighting is i**....

Contrary to popular belief, Children are not a natural occurrence...

Turns out they are Man-made.

A control freak has 5 kids, how many of them does it take to change a light bulb?

There's no point in trying, none of them can change anything.

Contrary to what historians will tell you, Napoleon had a more horrific death.

It turns out, the military leader had walked over an active land mine causing it to explode. Body parts were strewn all over the place. Yeah. That's right. Napoleon was Blown-apart!

Contrary to popular belief, Santa was born in the USSR.

If you had to deliver that many gifts in one night, you'd be Russian around too.

Control system theory joke

As Polish airline is flying into New York City, the captain announces over the address system, for those of you on the right side of the aircraft, you can see the Statue of Liberty out your window.
Immediately everyone in the seats on the left crowded into the right side, leaning over the other passengers to try to see out the window. Because of the sudden shift in weight, the pilot lost control, and the plane crashed, killing everyone aboard.
The official report said that the accident was due to instability caused by poles in the right half plane.

Contrary to popular belief, a pirate's favourite letter is not R.

His first love is the C.

I don't always contradict myself,

but when I do, I don't.

What is the controlling design factor for the ceiling of a study room?

The attention span.

For all the control system people, why did a plane travelling to Poland c**...?

Because the Poles were on the right hand side

There's so much controversy surrounding school zones

I swear, I see a sign saying "end school zone" in every single one.

Contrary to popular belief, it wasn't the apple on the tree that got us banished from Paradise.

It was the pair on the ground!

What did the contractor say to the impatient customer?

We are doing asbestos we can

I had a contractor joke...

But I ran out of material.

My ex said I was a contrarian

I disagree.

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these contr jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.