Contestant Jokes

Following is our collection of finalist puns and idol one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Contestant jokes for adults, dirty winner jokes and clean quiz dad gags for kids.

The Best Contestant Puns

A limbo contestant walks into a bar

He is immediately disqualified

Mike Tyson was arrested at a 5th grade sitting bee his first time judging

The word was Dictate.

[Spelling Bee Contestant] Can you use it in a sentence?

[Mike Tyson] She liked the way my Dictate

"Your word is their..."

"Your word is their," said the spelling bee judge.
The contestant, confused, asked for a sentence.
"They're looking for their dog over there," replied the judge.

A child was competing in a spelling bee and was doing quite well, until the moderator said: "your word is 'inward' "....

Spelling bee contestant: "N-I-G-G..."

Moderator: "Jesus no, stop please! "

Why were there only 49 contestants in the National Ebonics Beauty Pageant?

Nobody wanted to wear the sash that says "Idaho".


A limbo contestant walks into a bar...

...and is eliminated from the competition.

Mike Tyson is hosting a spelling bee

A contestant approaches the stage and Mike says, "the word is dictate"

The contestant thinks for a second, clearly pondering the spelling of the word. "Dictate... Mike, could you please use that in a sentence?"

Mike smoothly replies, "Well of course. When I was in prison, Maurice told me that my dictate good"

Final question on who wants to be a millionaire.

Host: When your wife goes to sleep, what does she wear?

1. Under garments.
2. Pyjama suit.
3. She sleeps naked.
4. Something sexy.

Contestant: I would like to phone a friend.

"What is the largest body of water in the world?" Quiz contestant: "The ocean?"

Asker: "I'm sorry, you're going to have to be more Pacific."

What's the difference between a wizard and a spelling bee contestant?

One can conjure spells, the other can spell conjure

Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump race around the White House

The slightly younger and less overweight Hillary managed to win this one, and this is the response from major news networks:

NBC: "Hillary Clinton wins the race, while Donald Trump comes in last!"

FOX: "Donald Trump takes second place in the race, while Hillary Clinton only manages to beat one contestant!"


Congrats! You're on the new game show, Serbia or Suburbia!

Contestant #1, who drinks vodka immediately when they get off work, because their country is falling apart?

My girlfriend left because I treated our relationship like a game show...

Oh well, she was a worthy contestant.

A short true tale about Ireland, quiz-shows and Hitler

Decades ago when I lived on the rocky coast of West Cork, there was a quiz show called "Quicksilver". It had a top prize of something like $1.25 (perhaps a bit more), and the contestants were just average people. In one show the contestant was asked for Hitler's first name. He thought about, smiled and said "Heil" He did not win his $1.25 but almost everyone in Ireland remembers the tale.

How do you figure out which contestant in a Ms. America pageant is a prostitute?

Look for the one with the sash that says "I da ho".

Miss Universe is rigged and I always know who's going to win before it even starts

The winner has always been a contestant from planet Earth

Wet T-shirt contestant asks former contest winner:

Any pointers?

You hear what happened to the beauty pageant contestant that came out covered in beef cuts?

she was ms. steak'n... and got grilled

Sign of the times: if you win a million bucks as a contestant on "The Wall"

...they make Telemundo pay for it.


GameShow Host: If Australians live in Australia, Where do Canadians live?

Contestant: **CANADIA**

What did the spelling bee contestant say when he stubbed his toe

"O-U-C-H!"

How many Jeopardy contestants does it take to change a light bulb?

Contestant 1: "Just one"

Contestant 2: "What is two?"

How did the Masterchef contestant call his pet pig?

Sous vide! Sous vide! Soooouuuus Viiiide.

So on wheel of fortune ...

On wheel of fortune, the spokesperson interviews each person standing by their game position. the spokesperson gets to the last contestant and asks: "what is your name?"
this woman was a large, black, and chubby chick.
she replies "Treasure."
a man in the crowd whispers to his friend 'wanna know why they named her treasure?"
"sure" he replies
"because when she was born, they wanted so desperately to bury her."

There is a jiu jitsu competition to see who can break the largest board with their fist. The judge asks all competitors to stand behind the first contestant, but no one listens.

There is no punch line.

There is an abundance of pageant jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 25 funniest jokes and contestant puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any rival witze you can hear about contestant.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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