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Contempt Jokes

6 contempt jokes and hilarious contempt puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about contempt that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.


Silly Contempt Jokes for a Good Time with Friends

What is a good contempt joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

The Washington r**... are changing the team name because of all the negativity, shame, humiliation, dissent, polarity, adversity, defiance, animosity, contempt, discrimination, division, counter-productivity and hostility associated with their name.

....from now on they will be known simply as the r**....

My grandpa's favorite joke

This works better in my native language, but I am going to do my best to try to translate it effectively.
At the end of a good day's work, an accountant goes home and announces proudly to his wife "Honey, I missed the bus today but I saved $2 by chasing after it all the way home! "
His wife fixes him with a look of pure contempt and says "You fool!! You could have saved $75 if you'd only chased after a cab."

Father, what causes arthritis?

A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a bus one day. He sat down next to a priest. The drunk's shirt was stained, his face was full of bright red lipstick and he had a half-empty bottle of wine sticking out of his pocket. He opened his newspaper and started reading. A couple minutes later, he asked the priest, ''Father, what causes arthritis?''
''Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, and contempt for your fellow man,'' the priest replied. ''Imagine that,'' the drunk muttered. He returned to reading his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, turned to the man and apologized: ''I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?'' ''I don't have arthritis, Father,'' the drunk said, ''but I just read in the paper that the Pope does.''

Rowan County Clerk Kim Davis found in contempt of court and taken into custody...

...making it the first time a public sector employee has gotten in trouble for not doing their job.

Why was Buddha a terrible sous chef?

He spent too long contempt plating inert peas

At the French restaurant I recently visited, my meal was filled with contempt (and cheese!) I could practically taste the hatred of the chef.

No wonder the menu item is called "The Crepes of Wrath"

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about contempt can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of contempt puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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