Following is our collection of diarrhea puns and flatulence one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Constipation jokes for adults, dirty digestion jokes and clean stomachache dad gags for kids.
Please hold.
Sipping from a bottle of whiskey, and quite inebriated, when the local Gard walks past.
"Sister Mary", he asks "what in God's name are you doing?!"
"Not to worry, sergeant. I'm trying to *hic* cure the Mother Superior's constipation."
"And how is you being in this state going to help the Mother Superior with her constipation exactly?!"
"Cos when she sees me like this", Sister Mary replied, "she'll be shittin a brick!"
They work it out with a pencil
It never came out.
Heard this one from my 10 year old cousin.
Him: "Have you seen the new movie about constipation yet?"
Me: "No..."
Him: "It hasn't come out yet. But people are pushing for its release!"
It won't let me logout.
Farfrompoopen
I'm scared shitless.
Of course you haven't.. it hasn't came out yet.
Oh wait - it hasn't come out yet!
*ba dum tss*
...until I found out that he meant I should eat the banana.
He said no because I'm full of shit
i can't wait for it to come out!
Both leave you waiting for the drop.
It hasn't come out yet.
1) Sit on the toilet.
There is no number two.
A man was talking to his pet ox. He asked the ox Hey ox, what's your favorite number? The ox replied, I don't know. I guess I'll go with 1. The man thought for a second then exclaimed, But Ox, why not number 2? The ox replied, Constipation .
Neither have I, it hasn't come out yet.
It hasn't come out yet.
He forces it out.
My boss bought it and even said he hopes I get well soon and stop being so full of shit
I was worried shitless.
He worked it out with a pencil.
Oh that's right, it hasn't come out yet..
It never came out
Oh my bad..... I don't think it has come out yet.
"Do you have the book on constipation?"
She replies, "It's not out yet"
"Yep, that's the one"
A #2 would do.
He worked it out with a pencil.
....But it never came out
It hasn't come out yet.
Expelli-anus
But it is not out yet.
It never came out.
She told me it hasn't come out yet
but they're a solid number two.
NNNNNNNNNN
Gritting my teeth and wishing it pass already.
He prescribed me a relaxative.
Sorry, it's not out yet.
I'll find out by a process of elimination.
Have you seen the new movie "Constipation"? Probably not... It never came out.
Joke credit goes to a 10 year old.
He dropped a log.
No?
That's cause it's not out yet
of course not, it never came out.
I bet you didn't because it isn't out yet.
/crappy joke , I know ;-)
And he said, It never came out.
Excretiating pain
Hung dung
But it didn't come out yet.
But it's not come out yet.
Nevermind, it hasn't come out yet!
Wait, never mind. It didn't come out yet.
No one talks about the constipation.
If I have kids I might not pass it on though.
But I was sitting there so long I can't remember the joke.
There is an abundance of ibs jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 56 funniest jokes and constipation puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any diarrhoea witze you can hear about constipation.
Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.