Humorous Constable Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life
Roger decided he was in no shape to drive as he walked out of the bar
So he sensibly left his car parked and walked home. As he was staggering along, he was stopped by a policeman.
'What are you doing out here at three o'clock in the morning?' asked the police officer.
'I'm on my way to a lecture,' answered Roger.
'And who on earth, in their right mind, is going to give a lecture at this time of night?' enquired the constable sarcastically.
'My wife,' slurred Roger grimly.
A small boy parks his bicycle nearby the Parliament house and walks on...
A police constable stops him and asks: "Why did you park your bicycle here? Don't you know about this road? Many politicians pass from here".
The boy innocently replies, "Don't worry, I have locked my bicycle".
Police want to interview a man suspected for a string of robberies wearing stockings and suspenders.
However, the Chief Constable has insisted they wear their normal uniform.
A constable receives notification about a theft from McGregor's farm near Nottingham. The dispatcher tells him that farmer McGregor reports the theft of 2033 pigs...
The constable starts writing the report, but decides to double-check the exact amount of the pigs. He calls McGregor and asks: "Mr McGregor, are you absolutely sure that there were 2033 pigs stolen?"
"Oh, yeth, conthtable, abtholutely!" McGregor answers.
The constable thanks him and continues to write the report: "Victim McGregor lost 2 sows and 33 pigs".
What do you call a constipated policemen?
constable
Constable
A week after a brazilian.
What do you call it when a female police officer shaves her bikini line?
Constable Care.
What did the painting of the Haywain and the rash on the l**... chin have in common?
They are both by Constable
(really bad, so sorry)
Did you hear about the police officer who was shot yesterday?
He's in a critical but constable condition
What do you call a policewoman who hasn't s**... for a week?
Constable
