The Best 68 Console Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Console jokes. There are some console thierry jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these console gamer puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Console Jokes and Puns

Why did the console player cross the road?

To render the buildings on the other side.

So a guy walks into a bar...

So a guy walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Whiskey?"
"No," says the customer, "just water; i was so drunk last night that I went home and blew Chunks."
The bartender tries to console him, saying "Oh come now, everyone gets a bit wasted from time to time."
To which the guy replies, "No, you don't understand: Chunks is my dog."

What was the console gamer's New Years Resolution?

1280x720

Console joke, What was the console gamer's New Years Resolution?

What does a Maple leaf fan do when they win the cup?

Turn off their console and go to sleep.

My ex-girlfriend called me to let me know she had AIDS...

I didn't know how to console her and make her feel better, so I just said, "I know."


What's the favorite game console for Japanese priests?

PlayStation

What game console do Latinos use most?

XBOX JUAN

Console joke, What game console do Latinos use most?

Hi. I am here. First post, go easy on me.

Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie whose dog, Skipper, had recently died.
"You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad. Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."
Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"

Why did the console gamer get a headache at the art museum?

Too many frames.

Why did the console gamer cross the road?

Why did the console gamer cross the road? To render the buildings across the street.

Child walks in on parents in coitus

Mummy and Daddy are having sex and their beautiful child walks in. Flustered, Mummy leaps off the bed (and off her husband) and wittingly tries to console what she thinks is her scarred son.

son: mummy, what's going on?
mum: oh son! I was just helping your daddy to flatten his belly
son: but why mummy? there's no point. the nanny just comes and blows it back up again.

You can explore console comfort reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean console xbox dad jokes. There are also console puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


How many Yale students does it take to change a lightbulb?

*One to hold the bulb up to the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them, three to scream at the circuit breaker and belittle it for controlling power, and eight others to console the first four while they tweet about how problematic this traumatic experience has been for everyone.*

Why do console gamers use their in game names in real life?

They don't have anti-aliasing

Why did the console gamer cross the road

To render the other side

My wife left me because "I am addicted to video games"..

I was so sad I could hardly console myself

Why did the game console leave her husband?

He was trying to controller

Console joke, Why did the game console leave her husband?

Backwards Compatibility.

People hated on the new console generation because they weren't backwards compatible, the Internet practically crucified Sony and Microsoft. But really people have always been like this.

Did you see what they did to that Jesus guy when he announced Christianity was no longer backwards compatible with Judaism?

My wife came home from work crying yesterday and asked me to console her.

So I hit her over the head with my Xbox.

How do you console somebody with bad grammar skills?

There, their, they're.


Why did the console player get sick in the art gallery?

There were too many frames.

Why did the console gamer faint when they visited the art gallery

There were too many frames

Why did the console gamer die in the art gallary?

There was too many frames.

So, Nintendo's stopped production of the Wii U and are producing their new console.

Looks like they decided it's a good time for a Switch.

Why did the console player faint at the museum?

Because there were so many frames!

Nintendo was going to convert a car factory to manufacture their new console.

But the factory owner didn't want to make the switch.

The XBox One X is Microsoft's new console

The short of that is XBOX, they've now come full circle, or 360.

American politicians must be console gamers

So many of them rant about being anti-PC

What's a chicken's favourite console?

An Eggsbox One

Rabbits died

My neighbor's pair of pet rabbits died unexpectedly within hours of each other. She was distraught. I suggested she go to my friend the taxidermist. When she arrived, my friend tried to console her and she asked him if he could create a memorial. "Of course", he replied. He explained that he could stuff them and they would almost look lifelike. He asked if she would like them mounted.
"No" she said, "holding paws would be fine."

What is the Doctor from Doctor Who's preferred console?

_Wiiii U_

da-da-da-dum, da-da-da-dum

da-da-da-dum, da-da-da-dum

_Wiiii U_, Wii-ii-ii U…

My friend invented a machine that can take a disc out of a console, then put a new one in

It's a game changer

Billy Joel's house has burned down. apparently due to a faulty game console.

Investigators say the fire was caused by a faulty game console. However, Mr Joel has claimed that Wii didn't start the fire.

What is a British police officer's favorite gaming console?

WiiiiiiiUUUUUUUUU WiiiiiiiUUUUUUUUU WiiiiiiiUUUUUUUUU
WiiiiiiiUUUUUUUUU
WiiiiiiiUUUUUUUUU

The Bison.

My son and I were hiking one day when a bison charged towards him as he was taking a leak. I shouted Bison but it was already too late and he died. My wife tried to console me and said Atleast you were able to say goodbye .

Why are PC gamers always so sad?

Because they can't console each other.

What's the police's favorite gaming console?

WII U WII U WII U WII U WII U WII U

Why were the console wars started?

Because neither side could find a clear resolution

If EA made a console

It would be the paystation

I invented a robot to remove the cartridge from my gaming console and replace it with another.

It was a game changer!

Which gaming console is preferred by most fruits?

The kiwii.

After a Year of use I can say without a doubt that the Nintendo Switch is the perfect console for Me

The Nintendo Sub was too under powered and the Nintendo Dom is more than I can handle.......

An elderly woman called 911...

An elderly woman called 911 from her cell phone to report that her car had been broken into.

"They've stolen everything! My radio is gone, my center console is gone, my mirror and the rosary beads hanging from it...even the steering wheel!"

The dispatcher responds that an officer is on the way.

Minutes later, the officer arrives and radios back into dispatch.

"Disregard that last call. She got in the back seat by mistake."

What do you call a gaming console that used to be yours?

An ex box

Fathers Day Joke

A small boy was at the zoo with his father. They were looking at the tigers, and his father was telling him how ferocious they were.

Daddy, if the tigers got out and ate you up…

Yes, son? the father asked, ready to console him.

…Which bus would I take home?

My girlfriend was upset and kept asking me to console her.

So I hit her with my Xbox.

What's a cop's favorite game console?

A Wii U

I was trying to console the wife of a serial killer who committed suicide.

I said, Hey, at least he died doing what he loved.

My friend is pretty sick and tired of PC culture

I tried to console him but he didn't want his hand held

A man was sobbing next to his ex-wife in the hospital who had just been hit by a bus..

He kept saying "It should have been me... it should have been me" over and over, with tears flowing out of his eyes.

The nurse tried to console him, telling him "Don't be too harsh on yourself. For all you know you couldn't have changed it, even had you been there"

To which he replied : "I guess you're right. After all, I don't even know how to drive a bus"

How did Scorpion console Sub-Zero when he broke up with his girlfriend?

GET OVER HER!!

I broke up with my video game console, now it's my ex-box

Nothing personal, it was just time for a switch

I accidentally bought a broken Nintendo console

I had to get a Wiifund

One evening when I was playing on my console..

One evening when I was playing on my console I noticed my girlfriend, who was sitting right next to me on the couch, looking all gloomy and sad.

Naturally I asked her what was wrong but she didn't answer.

So I turned of my console and she goes "why did you stop ?". I told her there's something much better than my console.

She looked really happy.

Until I turned on my PC.

What's a chicken's favorite console?

An EGGS box

My friend doesn't know if he wants the new Xbox X or PS5

A couple of us have tried giving him advice but he's still very troubled about the decision. Nobody can console him.

I played with my childhood console this morning.

It was a good Wiiunion.

I saw a 5 legged woman crying and I asked her why

She said she could never get shoes to match. I tried to console her so I said at least your knickers fit like a glove

A couple sees a man sobbing on his knees at a cemetery.

The man is yelling out "why did you have to die?", "I cannot live like this!"

The couple come over to console him, and notice the tombstone is of someone of similar age as the distraught man.
"Sir, who was this?" Asks the woman, "was it your brother? Your friend?"

The man looks up at them "my wife used to be married to him until he passed away".
Continues crying out: "Please come back, I cannot take her any longer!"

On which day of the week is it legal to marry the 8-bit Nintend console?

Wednesday.

I heard Sony's coming out with a new console during the pandemic

It's called the Plaguestation 5

I didn't get the Xbox Series X I wanted for my birthday.

I need someone to console me.

KFConsole joke

The console wars are over. Introducing the KFConsole. Power Your Hunger. A console from KFC that is more like a Steam Machine.

Have you heard that PlayStation are releasing a console for cats?

It's called the PSpspspspspsps

My friend can't decide what video game system to get for Christmas ...

... Nobody can console him.

My wife bought me a Nintendo switch for Christmas.

In a few years I'll have enough parts to build a whole console.

What console does a mute chicken have?

Ex-Bawks

How do you console an English teacher?

There, they're, their.

What is an ambulance's favorite game console?

Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the console sensor jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working console lag piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes