Consent Jokes
65 consent jokes and hilarious consent puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about consent that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article explores the sensitivity of the topic of age of consent, fornication, and other jokes associated with it. We dive into why some people remain divided on the subject and why there are times when it is important to go to and condemn the jokes told.
Funniest Consent Short Jokes
Short consent jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The consent humour may include short agreement jokes also.
- Want to hear a Cosby joke? Wait ... I told it wrong. I wasn't supposed to ask for consent.
- The next 600 stimulus check is gonna be a new U2 album downloaded on our phones without our consent
- You would think if a girl undresses you, that would be a sign of consent right? But the hospital says otherwise
- In light of the DNC event and my own recent experience with the forced install of windows 10.. What do the Clinton's have in common with Bill Gates? They both no longer need your consent.
- Why aren't kids under the age of 18 allowed to watch videos about duck calls without the consent of a parent? Because they contain a lot of fowl language.
- I couldn't sign the consent form for my prostate exam as the seat was too far away from the desk The dr. said Would you like me to push in your stool?
- So there's this witch that owns a motel and she'll give you a discount room if you consent to her experimenting on you... The sign outside says, Come on in and rest for a spell .
- The amusement park was taking photos of me on their rides without my consent When i found out, i was fluming!
- What do Microsoft updates and Brock Turner have in common? They install at night, while you are asleep, without consent.
- And finally my wife agreed that I can marry for the 2nd time... provided I get written consent from the Saudi consulate in Istanbul. ☠
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Consent One Liners
Which consent one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with consent? I can suggest the ones about permission and acceptance.
- Which is more important to women, length or girth? Turns out it's consent.
- What's the difference between rain and a shower? Consent
- How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two consenting adults.
- What do you call it when a cow get's milked without consent? "Moo-lestation"
- If you eat a banana without it's consent Does that make it Ripe?
- What country has the lowest age of consent? Vatican City
- You know what's the biggest turn off for me? Consent.
- Whats the age of consent in Thailand? 50$
- What do you call it when a fruit is fertilized without consent? Grape.
- Consent is golden. duct tape is sliver. And sometimes, you gotta come in second place.
- Why must melon families always consent to a marriage? Because they cantaloupe!
- I just love that fragrance you're wearing, is that Consent?
- Therapists only want one thing. No consent.
- How many Feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. The socket can't consent.
- Why does a shower feel good but rain feels bad? Consent
Age Of Consent Jokes
Here is a list of funny age of consent jokes and even better age of consent puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did the liquid, solid, and gas disagree on the age of consent? it varies from state to state.
Fun-Filled Consent Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle
What funny jokes about consent you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean approval jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make consent pranks.
Today I was asked, "What is something you prefer from a s**... partner, but could go without?"
"Consent"
I agree even in marriage, s**... without wife's consent is r**..., But by same logic isn't spending husband's money by the wife without his consent...Robbery? Why do our films find it funny? How can people joke about it?
Chant at a pro-s**... consent rally.
"What do we want?"
*-- Consensual i**...!*
"When do we want it?"
*-- Not right now!*
I kidnapped this girl last night...
And she yelled "Please, I don't want to die a v**...!". If that isn't consent, I don't know what is.
What's the difference between r**... and rapping?
One's mostly done by criminals in shady neighborhoods, and the other is s**... without consent.
What's the simplest way to prevent r**...?
Consent.
What stops r**... every single time?
Consent
I like my s**... like I like signing my contracts.
With affirmative consent.
Virginity is like f**......
Taken from me shortly after birth without my consent.
You know what ruins a r**...?
Consent
I prevented a r**... today
I gave my consent.
Talking politics these days is a lot like s**...:
You need both parties' consent and it only gets worse when the internet is involved
I wish s**... was like first aid...
..consent is implied if the person is unconscious
A long-awaited prize
So a rich dude wants to have s**... with a v**..., so he puts a girl into a convent until she reaches age of consent.
The big day comes and he's putting some l**... on his dingdong and the girls asks "what's that for?" He replies "so it doesn't hurt going in."
She replies "why don't you just spit on it like the monks do?"
I got in trouble at the swimming pool...
apparently you need consent to do the breast-s**...
It should be fair
A lawyer argued in court...
If physical intimacy with a wife requires her consent and without consent it is termed as r**..., then shopping without the husband's consent should be charged in court as robbery.
When someone says "r**... jokes aren't funny," I don't care.
It's not like I asked for their consent anyway.
Newton's third law of motion
states that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Therefore, if you are having s**... with a woman without her consent, she is equally having s**... with you without your consent, both cancelling eachother out and making r**... legal.
A poem for my beloved GDPR
'Twas the night before GDPR,
And all through the house
Any presence of rodents or motion of any creatures at all will not be disclosed without specific informed consent.
If you touch a sculpture below the pants without consent...
Is it called 'statue'tory r**...?
A man had s**... with a p**... without her consent.
He was sentence to 10 years in jail. Would he also be fined for shoplifting?
My SO: if we have children, we need t**... teach them about consent
Me: That goes without saying
What does c in r**... stands for?
Consent.
An inmate asked his cell mate what he was in for.
The man said he was in for murdering a man. He asked what he was in for.
Honestly I shouldn't be in here. They said it was because I had s**... with a woman.
The man raised an eyebrow and asked did she consent?
Yes. She consented.
How old was she?
23.
Then why did they put you in here?
The man scoffed and replied, they said dog years don't count.
r**... jokes aren't funny
Unless told without consent
In a s**...-ed class, the teacher asked me,"What was missing in your first s**... experience?"
Apparently, my answer "Consent" was wrong.
