Conscience Jokes

Following is our collection of morally puns and pager one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Conscience jokes for adults, dirty mindless jokes and clean fluid dad gags for kids.

The Best Conscience Puns

What's the difference between a Trump voter and a polar bear?

One is a fat, white, mindless killing machine with no conscience or future, and the other is a bear.

The coach discovers he is going to die in a week

He tells his wife: I want to clear my conscience. I have been unfaithful to you, only once, with your sister.
She says: That's okay. I too have been unfaithful to you, only once, with the football team.

I was invited to a dinner the other night.

The host warned me ahead of time, "Just so you know, we only serve vegetarian dishes. I hope you're alright with that."

I told him, "Of course! I have no problem with vegetarian dishes. In fact, I prefer them. But for the sake of conscience I do prefer it if the vegetarians were free range and locally sourced."

One day, i na moment of weakness, I spied on my neighbor changing her top.

It has racked my conscience ever since.

Trump walks into a bar and Is suprised to see the bartender is a genie

The genie says "what'll you have?" Trump says"give me something I'll regret in the morning" The genie gives him a conscience, empathy, and humility.

How do you tell apart drug pushers that have a conscience from those who don't?

Those who don't call themselves "reps,".

How do people with something on their conscience communicate?

They use Remorse code.

Dr. Holm struggles with a bad conscience after sex with a patient

A voice in him says, "Follow your desire". Another voice says: "Remember, you're a vet"

What is "conscience"?

That which feels bad when everything else feels good.

A percentage of my inner conscience doesn't like racist jokes.

Luckily that percentage is the minority so I can just ignore it.

I have clean conscience.

I haven't used it once until now.

I asked myself "What am i doing with my life?"

and my inner Conscience replied "Probably ruining it"


Vote early!
Vote your conscience!
Vote! Even if you've never voted before!
Vote! If your an Conservative, Vote!
Vote! If your an Democrat, Vote!
Vote! If your an Independent, Vote!
Vote! If your an Libertarian, Vote!
Vote! If your Republican, vote like you've never voted before!

There is an abundance of depress jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 13 funniest jokes and conscience puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any procrastinate witze you can hear about conscience.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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