The Best 20 Congratulate Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Congratulate jokes. There are some congratulate victory jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these congratulate brexit puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Congratulate Jokes and Puns

As the Kardashians celebrate their 20th and final season...

I would LOVE to congratulate myself for never watching a single episode.

My girlfriend is mad because I keep getting free drinks around town by saying I'm engaged

She said "Why is it that every time you say your engaged people congratulate you and buy you a drink, but when I say it they charge me double?"

I told her that when she says it they expect to see a ring but when I say it they expect to see an empty wallet

Trump Advisor: "You should't have called Putin to congratulate him on winning a sham election...."

Trump: "Why not? He called to congratulate me!"

Congratulate joke, Trump Advisor: "You should't have called Putin to congratulate him on winning a sham election...."

Trump called Putin to congratulate him on winning the election.

Putin said, 'Thanks, but why have you waited for over a year?

I'd like to congratulate Donald J Trump for winning

The silver medal in the 2020 presidential election.


I'd like to congratulate Whitney Houston...

...on being 24 hours sober!

I would like to congratulate Amy Winehouse

on almost 4 years of sobriety.

Congratulate joke, I would like to congratulate Amy Winehouse

How do you congratulate a Jewish bodybuilder?

Muscle Tov!

How do you congratulate a slice of bread on his wedding day?

Toast him

My brother proposed to his girlfriend while on holiday. I called to congratulate them...

...but they were engaged.

I'd like to be the first

to congratulate Amy Winehouse on her 4 years of sobriety.

You can explore congratulate candidates reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean congratulate year dad jokes. There are also congratulate puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


People always congratulate me when i tell them i beat cancer...

I mean just because I named my kid cancer doesn't mean I need to be congratulated...

I'd like to congratulate the inventor of the wobbly table

He must be successful with them being in every restaurant and cafe

How do you congratulate a fighter after winning a match?

Good jab.

How do Intel workers celebrate and congratulate each other?

They give each other i5's.

Do You Know A Good Place to Get Scrod?

A traveller who is a huge fan of seafood arrives in Boston for the first time. He leaves the airport and hails a cab. After he gets in, he excitedly says to the cabbie, "Hey, I'm new in town. Can you tell me a good place to go to get scrod?" The cabbie replies [in a thick Boston accent], "Pal, I've got to congratulate you. I've heard that question a lot over the years, but that's the first time I've ever heard it in the pluperfect subjunctive."

Congratulate joke, Do You Know A Good Place to Get Scrod?

I, for one, would like to congratulate Teresa May on her handling of Brexit. She took on a job we all said no sane human could pull off, and showed us that no insane human could pull it off either.

New life

- Well, I can congratulate you! A new life has arisen in you !!!
- Doctor ... but I'm a man!
- Yes? Well, actually, the worms somehow do not care.

I've just spent 30 days sober!!!

No need to congratulate me, since it's not in a row.


I've managed to spend 50 days without drugs and alcohol!!

No need to congratulate me, because it's not 50 days in a row.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the congratulate cuckoo jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working congratulate madoff piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes