The Best 40 Confederate Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Confederate jokes. There are some confederate hos jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these confederate cavalry puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Confederate Jokes and Puns

My dad said people shouldn't get ribbons just for participating because it rewards them for losing.

So I took down his confederate flag.

What do you call an injured Confederate soldier that can't find a medic?

A rebel without a gauze.

Walmart is banning sales of the Confederate flag

Well, there goes 95% of their buisness

Confederate joke, Walmart is banning sales of the Confederate flag

Pretty soon the only place you will be able to buy a Confederate flag will be the black market.

Oh the irony.

With the banning of the Confederate flag in America...

We are going through a period of erase-ism.

Worry not confederate flag supporters! You may have lost the battle...

But you haven't lost the w- oh right.

How many confederate flag bearing husbands does it take to beat up their wives?

None, she fell down the stairs.

Confederate joke, How many confederate flag bearing husbands does it take to beat up their wives?

Somewhere in Africa...

a bunch of orphans are about to be running around in confederate flag shirts.

What do you call a cup with a Confederate flag on it?

A Hiccup!

Get it? Hick-cup?

The Last Confederate Flag With all the crazy turmoil about the stars and stripes.

Stop and remember that the last official flag of the south used at the Appomattox Court House was a WHITE FLAG!

What do you call a confederate that's bleeding out?

A rebel without a gauze

You can explore confederate nutz reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean confederate virginian dad jokes. There are also confederate puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I don't know why the right is so in favor of confederate statues.

I don't know why the right is so in favor of confederate statues. They're pretty adamant about losers not getting participation trophies.

I'm no confederate statue...

But for the ladies, I always go down

My uncle was complaining about all the participation trophies kids get these days.

So I tore down his Confederate flag.

Confederate states be like

When you try your best but you don't secede.

Dad: Participation trophies are bad. It rewards people for losing and is unfair to the winners.

Me: *slowly takes down his confederate flag*

Confederate joke, Dad:  Participation trophies are bad. It rewards people for losing and is unfair to the winners.

I was walking in the Bronx when a black guy stopped me and said, Hey man, did the Yankees win?

I said, Yes, Of course. The South is still fighting over confederate statues though.

My mother told me that losers don't deserve to be commended.

So, naturally, I took down the confederate flag from the porch.

Dear confederate flag supporters, you may lose the battle but

You haven't lost the wa-Oh that's awkward

Confederate supporters say that we need to leave their statues up to teach history, and that is absolutely true

After all, it's not like they can read.

My grandpa was complaining about how participation trophies reward losing

So I asked him why he proudly displayed a Confederate Flag

Are Confederate statues racist?


Why did the Confederate general get mad at his family?

Because they wanted to have a reunion.

I'm glad they are taking down these Confederate statues

I don't believe in participation trophies.

Apparently NASCAR is banning all Confederate flags from its races.

But how will drivers know they've entered the last lap of the race? 🏳

Did you hear that NASCAR is banning the Confederate Flag?

**They should ban the Finish Flag, it has a "Checkered" past.**

Flying the Confederate flag doesn't make you a racist.

It's usually the other way around.

NASCAR got rid of the confederate flag from race tracks

Another true end to race wars.

So NASCAR has decided to ban confederate flags at all events...

Looks like all those years of turning left rubbed off on them.

Me: "Dude! Help! I'm convinced that I'm possessed by the ghost of an American Civil War General!" Ed: "That's incredible! Are you sure, man?"

Me: "Nope, but 'Grant,' Ed - that's a good guess."

Ed: "Are you ever possessed by confederate commanders?"

Me: "General Lee? No."

The US confederate flags supporters should be proud.

They are part of a long line of countries that lost wars to the USA.

The police were called to a NASCAR event when belligerent fans became violent after being asked to remove the Confederate flags they had brought to the event.

Authorities believe it to be race-related.

I don't understand why people keep tearing down Confederate statues?

Shouldn't the losers get to keep their participation trophies?

NASCAR can't ban the confederate flag

They wave it every race with one lap to go!

We really shouldn't be surprised that NASCAR banned the Confederate flag and is participating in charity auctions for pride month

They've been going left for years

My friend was angry when NASCAR banned the Confederate flag from the races

But he got angrier when I pointed out they still wave it on the final lap every race

Confederates are reverse Hitlers.

Hitler first sucked at art and then lost the war while Confederates first lost the war and then sucked at art.

Yo Mamma so ugly...

Yo momma so ugly that we created a global conspiracy "plandemic" and ruined the world economy and expedited the new world order and ruined Trump's rally and banned the Confederate flag from nascar and cancelled major league baseball just so she'd wear a mask.

To all the people who are upset at the fact that confederate statues are coming down, don't worry.

You may have lost the battle, but you have won the....never mind.

How do Confederates celebrate?

With Confetteri.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the confederate surrender jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working confederate virtues piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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