Cone Jokes
70 cone jokes and hilarious cone puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cone that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Start your day off with a laugh and read some of the best cone jokes around! From the humorous to the quirky, we have something for everyone. These jokes cover classic topics like dog cones, ice cream cones, snow cones, pine cones, construction cones, Alan Partridge cones, and even orange cones. Whether you're looking for a serious joke about pet cones or a lighthearted riff about Baskin-Robbins or Oreos, you'll be sure to find a cone joke that'll hit the spot.
Quick Jump To
- Short Cone Jokes
- Cone One Liners
- Ice Cream Cone Jokes
- Pine Cone Jokes
- Traffic Cone Jokes
- Snow Cone Jokes
- More Cone Jokes
Funniest Cone Short Jokes
Short cone jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The cone humour may include short chin jokes also.
- Ugly scenes Ugly scenes in centre of Leicester this evening
An 'anti Trump' protestor threw a traffic cone, narrowly missing US President by 5802 miles - A communist and his friend walk into an antique store His friend said:
Woah,look at this really fancy cone glass thing with the sand!,its mine!
The communist said:
no
Its Hourglass - What rests on the ground between my feet and is covered in ants? My ice cream cone. =(
*Inspired by actual events. - My dog has to wear this cone till he heals from surgery. It helps with the biting, but the barking? He sounds like a sub-whoofer.
- what did the lactose intolerant man say after eating an ice cream cone? please excuse my dairy air
- I went to a museum of modern art the other day and saw a cone statue. I really enjoyed it and would have liked to prolong my visit, but it was truncated.
- What do you get when one person thinks that there are 18 pine nuts in a pine cone and another person thinks there is 17 pine nuts in the same pine cone? A difference of a piñon!
- Two dogs are sitting outside One is wearing the cone of shame and the other is not
The dog wearing the cone says to the other,
"Hey Bob, I'm going to have to ask you do me a favor" - Things that have occurred in history since the Chicago Cubs last won a World Series... I had an ice cream cone. That I dripped all over myself.
- What does M.Night Shyamalan always order when he goes out for ice cream? A large twist cone.
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Cone One Liners
Which cone one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with cone? I can suggest the ones about coop and elope.
- On hot summer days, what do cats eat? A mice-cream cone!
- I'm fair-skinned. I have tattoos of ferris wheels, tilt-a-whirls and sno-cones.
- What's fat, orange and that everyone avoids? A traffic cone.
*what did you expect?* - What do you call ice cream you eat in a car? A traffic cone!
- Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream cone? He was run-over by a car.
- How do tree's like their ice cream? In a pine cone.
- I bought a TV from a guy wearing a white outfit and a white cone mask It was a 3k tv
- Where's the best place to store ice cream cones? Conetainers
- What do you call it when two ice creams want to have a child Cone-ception
- Why did the female snowman delete Tinder? She was getting too many snow cone pics.
- How do you call a clown's breast implants that are pointy instead of round? Silly cones.
- The dumbest kid in chemistry class doesn't wear a dunce cap. He wear a silly cone.
- What does the ice-cream van man do to save his parking spot? Puts cones out.
- What happened to the ice cream cone that got ran over by a lawn mower? it was a la mowed
- I was playing tennis and eating an ice cream cone, I'm glad it was soft serve.
Ice Cream Cone Jokes
Here is a list of funny ice cream cone jokes and even better ice cream cone puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Michel J Fox walks into an ice cream parlor. He orders a large cone with two scoops what flavors does he choose? It doesn't matter he's just going to drop it anyway
- Why did timmy drop his ice cream cone? Timmy got hit by a train
- Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? Because he never had a father.
- Why did Lucy drop her ice cream cone Because she was hit by a truck
- Boy, you make me like an ice cream cone on a hot day. Dripping.
- Why'd Billy drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a bus.
- Did you hear about the Tourette's ice cream cone? It takes a l**..., and keeps on ticcing.
Pine Cone Jokes
Here is a list of funny pine cone jokes and even better pine cone puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did the pine tree fall over? It had too many cones
- What do you call a pine cone that creates exact replicas of itself? A pine clone
- Why are pine trees always s**... ? They have to many cones
Traffic Cone Jokes
Here is a list of funny traffic cone jokes and even better traffic cone puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Snooki is so short and orange that she works part time as a traffic cone.
Snow Cone Jokes
Here is a list of funny snow cone jokes and even better snow cone puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you call a pin head with dandruff? A snow cone
- I'm not racist, but... I enjoy eating snow cones on hot days.
Laughable Cone Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles
What funny jokes about cone you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean horn jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make cone pranks.
A lady walks into an ice cream shop.
"Can I get a chocolate scoop on a cone?" she asks.
"Sorry, ma'am, but we're out of chocolate ice cream," says the man behind the counter.
"Oh, well then can I get a chocolate sundae?" she asks.
"We're out of chocolate," he repeats.
"Well, how about a chocolate milkshake?"
The man is frustrated at this point and decides to teach her a lesson.
"Ma'am, do you see the 'van' in vanilla?"
"Yes," she says.
"Do you also see the 'straw' in strawberry?"
"I do."
"Ma'am, do you see the 'frick' in chocolate?"
"There's no 'frick' in chocolate..."
"THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU!"
Ice cream
A penguin was having car trouble and decided to take it in to the shop. When the mechanic told him it would be a while he decided to walk around and do some shopping. After a bit he stopped off for an ice cream cone. Finally, he heads back to the auto shop. "Looks like you blew a seal." says the mechanic. "no" replied the penguin, "it's just a little ice cream."
A penguin notices his car is leaking fluid...
so he takes it to the closest garage. Mechanic says he'll check it out, and to come back in a half hour. The penguin sees a Dairy Queen, strolls over, and buys himself a vanilla cone. Being a penguin, without hands, he makes quite a mess, getting ice cream all over himself. When he gets back to check on his car, the mechanic looks up, shakes his head, and says, "Looks like you blew a seal." The penguin replies, "Na, it's just ice cream."
A penguin was driving along...
A penguin was driving along when he smelled something burning. He took his car to a mechanic to get it checked out. The mechanic said "It'll be about an hour" so the penguin went walking around town. He stopped at an ice cream parlor and ordered a cone. The penguin tried eating the ice cream, but made a mess because of his flippers. He went back to the mechanic who had just got under his car. The mechanic rolled out from underneath and said "looks like you blew a seal". The penguin replied "no, it's ice cream".
So a penguin is driving along one day...
... and has engine trouble. So he stops at an autoshop and they get to work on his car. It's a rather hot day, so he walks over to the convenience story and buys an ice cream cone.
As he's finishing the cone, the mechanic walks over to him and says "Looks like you blew a seal."
"No no!" he cries, "It's just ice cream!"
A penguin is driving....
down the street when his car starts sputtering. He pulls into the next mechanics shop and asks him to take a look. mechanic says it will be about an hour. While waiting the penguin decides to go next door to the malt shop and get an ice cream cone. an hour later the penguin goes back to the mechanic.
the mechanic looks at him and says "looks like you blew a seal".
"oh no I just had some ice cream" said the penguin wiping his face.
My coworker was eating an ice cream cone on her lunch break when she caught me staring at her
"Hey what's up?" she said
"Oh nothing.. It's just that I want to ask for something but I'm afraid you'll misunderstand me." I replied
"Haha don't worry, I won't." She said reassuringly
"I wanna lick it." I said
She quickly extends the ice cream cone to me, to which I said:
"I knew you'd misunderstand."
A penguin's car broke down in the middle of the city.
So he got his car towed to a mechanic's shop and walked to an ice-cream shop to grab a large cone.
After about 20 minutes, he walked back to the mechanic's shop and asked if he knew what the problem was.
"It looks like you blew a seal," said the mechanic.
"No, no, I swear to god it's just ice-cream."
So a father and son are sitting outside an icecream shop.
And three women walk out, one l**..., one s**... and one biting the icecream cone. The father asks the son, "which one of those girls is married?" The son replies "obviously the one s**... the cone"
"No son, the one with the wedding ring, but I like the way you think."
Sorry for grammar. I smart
Little Johnny is in class...
The teacher asks the class, "there are 5 birds on the line, someone shoots one bird, how many are left?"
Johnny says none, because when the gun went off, there birds flew away. The teacher says, no there are 4 but I like the way you're thinking.
Johnny says ok teacher, there are 3 women sitting on a bench eating ice cream cones. The first one is lightly l**... the ice cream, the second is biting the ice cream and the third one gobbles the whole cone down. Johnny asks, which one is married? The teacher says, the one that gobbles the ice cream cone down? Johnny says, no, it's the one with the wedding ring on, but I like the way you're thinking.
A penguin takes his car to the shop for maintenance.
He goes across the street to a ice cream stand for a vinilla cone. Later he goes back to the shop to check on his car. Mechanic says "looks like you blew a seal". Penguin goes "No, it's just ice cream".
A penguin's car breaks down
He brings it to his mechanic and the mechanic tells him it will take a while to diagnose the issue. It's a hot day out and so the penguin decides to go across the street to have an ice cream cone while he waits. He then returns to the mechanic's shop and his mechanic says "well, it looks like you blew a seal". The penguin replies "oh no, this is just ice cream"
Another penguin joke. n**...
A penguin takes his car in to a mechanic, and the mechanic tells him it will be an hour until he is ready. So the penguin decides to get an ice cream cone.
Penguins don't have opposable thumbs let alone fingers so he ends up with ice cream all over himself.
Later, he returns to the mechanic who says"I found the problem. It looks like you blew a seal."
The penguin says, "No, I just ate some ice cream."
A penguin was driving down the street eating a vanilla ice cream cone.
He started having car trouble, so he pulled to the side of the road.
A little while later some cops pull up to help.
After they check his car, they tell him, "It looks like you blew a seal" and he goes, "Oh, no, I was just eating an ice cream cone"
A penguin is driving down the highway when he starts having engine problems.
He pulls into a local mechanic's and the mechanic says, Give me an hour and I'll let you know the problem. The penguin walks out and see an ice cream shop and goes in for a vanilla cone.
An hour later, he walks back to the mechanic's. The mechanic see him coming and meets him at the counter and says, It looks like you've blown a seal.
The penguin wipes his mouth and says, No, no, that's just ice cream.
White robe with a cone top was really popular among the members of k**....
It was a cult classic.
I'm so pale...
I'm so pale that when I went outside last winter, the neighborhood kids said, "Hey, look! Frosty's on a diet!"
I'm so pale that when I worked in the ice cream parlor and was giving a kid his vanilla cone, he started l**... my hand.
I'm so pale that my house is listed as haunted. It was built last year!
I'm so pale that when I went to confession, the priest told me to eat a clove of garlic.
A walruses car broke down.
While waiting for the mechanic to troubleshoot the problem he decided to walk to the ice cream parlor. He ordered a vanilla ice cream cone and ate it while walking back to the car shop. As he finished the last bite he realized he forgot to grab a napkin. As he desperately tried to clean his very sticky face and hands the mechanic step out of the garage. Looks like you blew a seal the mechanic said. No the walrus replied it's just ice cream .
A man went to the ice cream shop and ordered a chocolate cone...
I'm sorry, Sir, we're out of chocolate.
Oh, that's too bad. I'll have a chocolate cone with sprinkles then.
I'm sorry, Sir, but like I told you, we're out of chocolate.
How about a chocolate/vanilla twist, then?
Let me ask you something. How do you spell the 'van' in 'vanilla'?
V-a-n.
OK! We're on the same page! And how do you spell the 'straw' in 'strawberry'?
S-t-r-a-w.
Right, and lastly, how do you spell the f**...' in 'chocolate'?
There is no f**...' in 'chocolate'.
THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU!
A man walked into the doctor's surgery
He had half a bun on his head, a sausage behind his ear, several pickles in his shirt and an ice cream cone on his foot.
The doctor took one look and said
"Im afraid you're not eating properly."
The cast of The Wizard of Oz go out for ice cream.
The Lion stops l**... his cone, yelling, "Ouch!" and gripping his temples.
The Tinman stops l**... his cone, yelling, "Ouch!" and gripping his temples.
Dorothy stops l**... her cone, yelling, "Ouch!" and gripping her temples.
The Scarecrow says, "What's the matter with you guys?"
