Concussion Jokes
43 concussion jokes and hilarious concussion puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about concussion that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Concussion Short Jokes
Short concussion jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The concussion humour may include short head injury jokes also.
- My neighbor's in the guinness book of records. He's had 44 concussions. He lives very close to me, in fact it's just a stone's throw away.
- John has 20 watermelons and tim has none. John threw one watermelon at tim, what does tim have now? A concussion.
- What do you call a head injury at a drummer's convention in Moscow, Russia? A concussion at the Russian percussion discussion.
- Last year Hillary got a concussion. Obama recently bumped into Clinton and asked "Bill, how is Hillary's head?" "Not as good as Monica"
- My neighbour has had a record 44 concussions. He lives very close to me.
A stone's throw away in fact
-StewartFrancis - My neighbour holds the Guinness world record for most concussions. He lives very close, just a stone's throw away
- After a night of drinking, John walks into a metal bar The music was great and he hooks up with a beautiful blonde.
He awakes at the hospital with a mild concussion. - A homophobic man walks into a gay bar He gets a concussion. Turns out gay steel is just as hard as straight steel.
- Mosquito bites nowadays can cause concussion yesterday, one of them bit my friend in his head, but fortunately I was able to kill it with a shovel
- I have a friend who is in the Guinness Book of World Records for "Most Concussions" He lives about a stones throw away.
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Concussion One Liners
Which concussion one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with concussion? I can suggest the ones about brain damage and injury.
- Concussions aren't real It's all in your head
- The only people who get more concussions than nfl players.. are their wives
- What's it called when the Grim Reaper screws up and gets a concussion? A repercussion
- A very tall and handsome man walks into a bar and suffers a mild concussion.
- A man walks into a bar. He ends up with a concussion.
- Two men walk into a bar They walk away with a concussion and brain damage
- A guy walks into a bar -- and sustains a mild concussion.
- A guy runs into a bar... and gets a concussion.
- A man ran into a bar... And died of concussion.
- How do you give a vampire a concussion? Hit it with a bat
- What does autocorrect and women have in common? They both jump to concussion
- a man walks into a bar He gets a concussion.
- Two Giants walk into a bar One gets a concussion, and the other breaks right through.
- Doctor! I think I have a concussion! Doctor: "Dont worry, Its all in your head"
- A guy walks into a bar Then gets a concussion
Gather Around for Fun Concussion Jokes and Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about concussion you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean trauma jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make concussion pranks.
My 85-year-old grandfather was rushed to the hospital with a possible concussion.
**The doctor asked him a series of questions: Do you know where you are? I'm at Rex Hospital. What city are you in? Raleigh. Do you know who I am? Dr. Hamilton. My grandfather then turned to the nurse and said, I hope he doesn't ask me any more questions. Why? she asked. Because all of those answers were on his badge. **
Blonde in a car c**....
Blonde says to the paramedic, "I think I have concussion."
Paramedic asks the blonde, "How many fingers have I got up?"
Blonde screams, "Oh my God, "I'm paralyzed from the waist down."
A man worked at construction site...
...and is brought to emergency room with concussion and skull fracture.
His wife, furious, comes to hospital.
"What happened?!"
"Well, I asked John to throw me the hammer..."
"And then what?! You didn't catch it?"
"In matter of fact *I did*. But then I remembered we have 3 guys named John working on our site..."
On the badge you......
My 85-year-old grandfather was rushed to the hospital with a possible concussion. The doctor asked him a series of questions: Do you know where you are? I'm at Rex Hospital. What city are you in? Raleigh. Do you know who I am? Dr. Hamilton. My grandfather then turned to the nurse and said, I hope he doesn't ask me any more questions. Why? she asked. Because all of those answers were on his badge.
My mum's favourite piece of advice to give me when I was growing up was, "Whenever life puts an obstacle in your way, the best way to deal with it is to tackle it head on".
I used to think she was wise but now I'm nursing a concussion and being sued for damages, since my neighbor parked in front of my driveway last week.
A mailman, a boy, and a unicorn walk into a bar.
The woman gets a concussion, some stitches, and a diagnosis of dissociative identity disorder.
A hockey player was asked, 'How many accidents have you had in your career?'
The player responded, 'None for sure. I've had two concussions, lost all my front teeth, have had my nose broken four times, but they weren't accidents. The opponents did it on purpose'.
A wise man once told me that you should love with your heart and use your head for everything else
He died of a concussion
I am worried about my neighbour as he gets too many concussions and we are very close...
in fact just a stones throw away!
I'm ready for this whole United thing to blow over...
It's just beating a concussed Asian doctor at this point.
A Cognitive psychologist asks a concussed man to count from one to ten.
The man does as he is told and counts : " 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 "
"Alright then, everything seems normal. Now could you count all the even numbers from one to ten please"
The man counts: "1, 3, 5, 7, 9"
"That's odd"
