Concierge Jokes
12 concierge jokes and hilarious concierge puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about concierge that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Concierge Short Jokes
Short concierge jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The concierge humour may include short travel agent jokes also.
- Two Native Americans walk into a restaurant... The concierge asks, "Do you have reservations?" One of the guys replies, "Yes; mine is in Oklahoma and his is in Arizona."
- Kendall Jenner walks into a restaurant, the concierge greets her by saying 'Good evening, Miss Jenner.' She responds 'Please, call me Kendall...' '...Miss Jenner is my father.'
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Concierge One Liners
Which concierge one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with concierge? I can suggest the ones about ambassador and consultant.
- What do you call a concierge doctor? An on-call-ogist
Cheerful Fun Concierge Jokes for Lovely Laughter
What funny jokes about concierge you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean personal assistant jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make concierge pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Yoda is working at a hotel as a concierge and a man walks up to the desk.
Yoda is working at a hotel as a concierge and a man walks up to the desk.
Yoda: Hello, welcome, you are.
Man: Hi, I'd like to book a t**... for the weekend.
Yoda: Sorry I am, only duplex we have.
Man: Are you sure? I really need the t**....
Yoda: There is no tri, only du.
Caught the flu in Madrid on a business trip.
Whilst sniffling and coughing and rolling around in the hotel bed, I realised I needed medical attention, so I called the concierge to get help.
"Oh, so you're sick!" came the reply. "Not a problem, we'll send our very own hotel doctor up to your room right away!"
The doctor strolled into the room within seconds, and whilst I stuttered and tried to comprehend the situation, he gave me some medicine to ease the symptoms. When I finally stammered out "h...how does the hotel have their own doctor on call?", he simply shook his head and cracked a smile, and replied:
"Nobody expects the Spanish inn physician."
I caught the flu in Madrid.
While sniffling and coughing and rolling around in the hotel bed, I realized I needed medical attention, so I called the concierge to get help.
"Oh, so you're sick!" came the reply. "Not a problem, we'll send our very own hotel doctor up to your room right away!"
The doctor strolled into the room within seconds, and whilst I stuttered and tried to comprehend the situation, he gave me some medicine to ease the symptoms. When I finally stammered out "h...how does the hotel have their own doctor on call?", he simply shook his head and cracked a smile, and replied:
"Nobody expects the Spanish inn physician."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Donald Duck calls concierge
and says can you thend up thome condomths to my room" and concierge said "want me to put it on your bill?" and Donald said "are you thucking thtupid I'll thuffocate"
A couple are on holiday on a pacific island...
When they arrive they hear a constant drum beat; the ask the taxi driver and he says "Drums must never stop!"
They get to the hotel and the drumming is still going, so they ask the cleaner and she says "Drums must never stop!"
The drums continue all night and the couple can't sleep. Exhausted, they storm down to reception and ask about the noise. "Drums must never stop!", says the concierge.
"But why?!" demand the couple.
"Because when drums stop... Bass solo begins!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So in some parts of the world, in some hotels, if you call the concierge in the middle of the night for an extra pillow, it is a code that you want them to send a h**... to your room.
What if, in the middle of the night, you actually do need an extra pillow and they send you a h**... instead?
Then you have TWO h**...,
And only one pillow to smother them with!
The Stasi tells Honecker there's a West German spy in his Central Committee.
So Honecker takes his favourite Stasi man along to the next meeting. The concierge (an old red) sees Honecker and the Stasi agent go in and, just one minute later, the Stasi man exiting , with a Central Committee member hand-cuffed to him.
"Comrade, I'm so impressed with your speed and efficiency. How did you discover this enemy agent so quickly?" asked the concierge
"It's simple , Comrade. Our dear Comrade Honecker began his speech and I remembered our Lenin's dictum: 'The Class Enemy never sleeps!' "
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
KGB Joke, from old country
This was definitely a response to that thread about the passport staples
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Four men are staying in a hotel room. Three have opened a bottle of v**... and are getting pretty rowdy, while the fourth is trying to get some sleep. He leaves the room and asks the concierge for some tea for room 60, where they are staying. He returns to the room, leans into an ashtray and says "Comrade Major, more tea for room 60". A short while later, there is a knock at the door and tea is delivered. The other three men are visibly spooked and quiet down. The fourth man goes to sleep.
The next morning, the other three men are gone. He goes downstairs and asks the concierge where they went, He says "You don't need to know". The man asks, "But why was I left alone?". The concierge replies, "Comrade Major really liked that tea joke"
