Compound Jokes
55 compound jokes and hilarious compound puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about compound that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Want to learn to make funny jokes using compound words? This article covers how to create compound sentences, compound interest jokes and even jokes about chemical compounds like tungsten and fluorine. Get a laugh with these clever compound jokes!
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Funniest Compound Short Jokes
Short compound jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The compound humour may include short complex jokes also.
- A bank teller decides to leave his job to go back to college for an education in chemistry. Turns out he had a compound interest.
- What do you call an organic compound in which a hydroxyl is bound to a carbon atom of an alkyl?? See? Sometimes alcohol IS the answer!!
- A chemist walks into a bar... And sees NaCl being beaten up. He asks, "Is that ionic compound being attacked?" The bartender replies, "No, it's a salt"
- Did you hear about the banker who's also learning chemistry? He's got a lot of compound interest.
- What chemical compound prevails over constant negative press? Carbon monoxide vanadium di-iron
- Perry was busy building a defensive palisade around the Musketeer compound, but it was leaning over badly. Suddenly Porthos spots the enemy and yells 'Attack! Perry, REPOST!'
- Why are compounds so cheap? Because they are free of charge.
Thought of this one while in chem class - Me neither Did you hear the one about the average of the sum of all organic compounds that contain an oxygen atom connected to two alkyl atoms?
No?
Mean ether. - Scientists have uncovered the fact that there is a chemical compound that cures all diseases with a single dose. It's called Cyanide.
- I've finally created a field of math which can calculate the degree to which Donald Trump is compounding his problems... Cuckulus
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Compound One Liners
Which compound one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with compound? I can suggest the ones about combination and composition.
- What do you call an ionic compound carrying a gun A salt with a deadly weapon
- Girl, you must be a savings account... Because my interest is to compound you daily.
- What compound is found in a lazy person's brain? Sodium Procrastinate
- How do chemical compounds cry? They break down
- Why did the investment bankers start dating? Compound interest
- Did you hear about the organic compound who became a bully? Mean ether.
- What do you call it when a cult is looking to get a loan for property? Compound interest
- Hey, are you a loan? 'Cause my interest is to compound you.
- Yo mama's so intrinsic she compounds daily. All my finance majors out there.
- Did you hear about the hipster compound? It's ionic.
- What is the best-looking chemical compound? Copper (II) telluride.
- How do track and field athletes stay buff? Lapping compound
- What did the butterfly say when he failed his eye exams? "COMPOUND IT!"
- Why is BrO3 the nicest compound? It calls everyone Bromate.
- Which chemical compound is the best at boxing? Potassium Oxide
Compound Interest Jokes
Here is a list of funny compound interest jokes and even better compound interest puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I GOT MONEY IN THA BANK! But I'm not really trying to take it out right now because I have it in a high-yield savings account with 1.05% daily compounded interest
Chemical Compound Jokes
Here is a list of funny chemical compound jokes and even better chemical compound puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What's Bruce Willis' favourite chemical compound? Sodium Diehardonate.
- Which chemical compound are you most likely to find at a frat party? Hydrogen *Bro*mide.
Ionic Compound Jokes
Here is a list of funny ionic compound jokes and even better ionic compound puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What is the least attractive binary ionic compound? Iron (II) oxide
Entertaining Compound Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone
What funny jokes about compound you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean combine jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make compound pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So I heard they built a gayporn production facility on the CERN-compound...
Apparently it's called the "Large h**... Collider".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Punny Chemistry
"What's j**... Sandusky's favorite compound?"
"What?"
"A mole ester"
Math in the real world
Basic Math is the subject I teach at a small community college in western North Carolina. I call one part of the curriculum Practical Applications for Living in the Real World. The day after I presented a lesson on simple and compound interest, one of my older students approached me in the hallway. "You really taught me a great deal about my life yesterday," he said. "I realized I've been struggling with a lack of interest, compounded daily, for thirty years."
Ferrari
Woman:
Do you drink beer?
Man: Yes
Woman:
How many beers a day?
Man:
Usually about 3
Woman:
How much do you pay per beer?
Man: $5.00 which includes a tip
Woman:
And how long have you been drinking?
Man:
About 20 years, I suppose
Woman:
So a beer costs $5 and you have 3 beers a day which puts your spending each
month at $450. In one year, it would be approximately $5400 correct?
Man:
Correct
Woman:
If in 1 year you spend $5400, not accounting for inflation, the past 20
years puts your spending at $108,000, correct?
Man:
Correct
Woman:
Do you know that if you didn't drink so much beer, that money could have
been put in a step-up interest savings account and after accounting for
compound interest for the past 20 years, you could have now bought a Ferrari?
Man:
Do you drink beer?
Woman:
No
Man:
Where's your Ferrari?
Women Think Differently
Husband's Text Message by cell phone:
"Honey, got hit by car when I was out of office. Paula brought me to Hospital. They're doing tests and X-rays now. Blow to my head very strong, fortunately it didn't cause serious injury, but I have three broken ribs, a compound fracture in left leg, and they may have to amputate right foot.
Wife's Text Response by Cell Phone:
"Who's Paula?"
My chemistry teacher pulled this on us today.
We were reviewing balancing chemical equations and got onto the topic of changing the names of compounds into their symbols so we could start balancing them. My teacher starts, "Changing names into symbols, is very much like translating Spanish into English. Maria estudia. Maria studies. Carlos va a la biblioteca. Carlos goes to the library. Now I would have said prison but I don't know how to say that in Spanish."
From the Hospital...
Husband: Honey, I got hit by a car outside of the office. Tina brought me to the Hospital. They have been conducting examinations and tests and taking X-rays. The blow to my head, though very strong, will not have any serious or lasting injury. But I have three broken ribs, a broken arm, a compound fracture in the left leg, and they may have to amputate my right foot.
Wife: Who is Tina?
A husband sends a text to his wife.
Honey, I got hit by a car outside of the office. Tina brought me to the hospital. They have been taking tests and doing x-rays. The blow to my head is very strong, may be serious. Also, I have 3 broken ribs, a broken arm, a compound fracture on my left leg and they may have to amputate the right foot.
Wife's Response:
Who is Tina?
The Way Women Think
Husband's Message (by text):
"Darling, I got hit by a car outside the office. Paula brought me to the hospital. They have been doing tests and taking X-rays. The blow to my head though very strong, should not have any serious or lasting effect but, I have three broken ribs, a broken arm, a compound fracture of the left leg and they may have to amputate my right foot. Fingers crossed!"
Wife's Response:
"Who's Paula?"
Husband send a text to his wife
Husband's text:
>Honey, I got hit by a car outside the office.
Paula brought me to the Hospital.
Doctors presently doing tests and taking X-rays.
Severe blow to my head but not likely to have any lasting effects. Wound required 19 stitches.
I have three broken ribs, a broken arm and compound fracture in the left leg. Amputation of my right foot is a possibility.
Love you.
Wife's response:
>Who's Paula?
A chemist and his friend go to lunch. When asked what they want to drink,the chemist says, "I'll have some H2O." His friend says "I'll have some H2O too"
When they get their drinks, they both are fine because the waiter is a sensible person who is able to distinguish the difference between the chemical compound H2O2, hydrogen peroxide, and asking to have water, like his friend.
As a reward for winning a race, a young stallion was put in a compound with a beautiful female zebra.
As the next day dawned, the keeper ran to see how the stallion had made out and was chagrined to see him leaning up against a tree. His mane was disheveled, his body covered in welts from angry hooves, and he had two giant black eyes. Astounded, the keeper asked what had happened.
The stallion said, "I spent the whole night trying to take off her pajamas."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
As the navy seals burst into o**... bin ladens room in his pakistani compound, his last dying words forever wrung in the ears of the seals...
"It was just a prank bro"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Chemistry Lesson
Me: "Hey girl, if you were a compound, you'd be copper telluride. You know why?"
Girl: "Because I'm cute?"
Me: "Nah, you're just really dense."
Husband says'' Honey, it's me. I don't want to alarm you but
. . . I was hit by a car as I was leaving the office. Paula brought me to the hospital. They've checked me over and dome some tests and x-rays. The blow to my head was severe. Fortunately, it didn't cause any serious internal injury. However, I have three broken ribs, a compound fracture in the left leg, and they think they might have to amputate my right foot.''
Wife : ''Who's Paula?''
"Professor, what organic compound do you need for the experiment, Amine or Benzene?"
- Ether is fine
