Composer Jokes
91 composer jokes and hilarious composer puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about composer that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
From Chopin to Beethoven, check out this round-up of the funniest composer jokes! Perfect for classical music fans, these jokes are sure to make you laugh out loud and provide hours of entertainment for you and your orchestra.
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Funniest Composer Short Jokes
Short composer jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The composer humour may include short artist jokes also.
- Stallone: I'm making a movie about composers. I'm playing Vivaldi. VanDamme: I'll be Mozart.
Schwarzenegger: Stop it guys I'm not saying it. - Why did Mozart kill all of his chickens? When he asked him who the best composer was, they replied, "Bach Bach Bach"
- What did arnold schwarzenegger say when Sylvester Stallone wanted to dress up as classical composers for Halloween? "You be Beethoven, I'll be Bach."
- Since 1782, at the age of 12, Beethoven was composing some of the greatest music ever, of course since 1827 all he has been doing is decomposing.
- In honor of Father's day, a dad joke There is a rumor that a movie about a 17th century classical composers will be made. It will even star Arnold Schwarzenegger among others.
He'll be Bach - What do you call a musical equation that a former Vice President composes? An algorithm
(Credit to my girlfriend) - A few hundred years ago, Mozart was composing beautiful music But for a while now, hes only been de-composing.
- i've got a Liszt of great composer puns that's Haydn in my closet somewhere... i could look Bach there and read it to you, but i don't think you could Handel it.
- A director and composer are arguing about the score of a film Composer: Is it really THAT important that there are no voices in any of the tracks?
Director: It's instrumental - What's the difference between a musician and a dead body? One composes, the other decomposes...
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Composer One Liners
Which composer one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with composer? I can suggest the ones about composed and creator.
- So did you hear about the Angry composer? Apparently, he had a few scores to settle.
- Who is a chicken's favorite composer? Bach
- I asked my dog which classical composer he liked the best... Bach.
- So I died and was reincarnated as a composer... I'm Bach now.
- Did you hear about the constipated composer? He couldn't finish the last movement.
- Why did the composer go to the chiropractor? Because he had Bach problems
- Which composer got the coronavirus? DryCoughsky
- Who is a Boston Terrier's favorite classical composer? Bach
- What do Beethoven's 9th and a dead baby have in common? They're both D-composed.
- Why couldn't Bach pay for his rent? Because he was a Baroque composer.
- What's a composers favorite type of girl? a minor
- Why did the zombie start ripping up sheet music? Because he was de-composing.
- What did the poor composer say to his friend? I am baroque, can you lend me some money?
- What happened when the composer got angry? He flew off the Handel
- How does a composer remember which groceries to buy? She writes a Chopin Liszt.
Classical Composer Jokes
Here is a list of funny classical composer jokes and even better classical composer puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you get when you cross a Classical German composer with an erupting volcano? Baklava.
(It came to me in a dream last night. I dunno man..) - Who's a lumberjack's favorite classical composer? Chopin.
- Which classical composer is best at playing hide and seek? Haydn. [OC]
- Arnold Schwarzenegger is actually a talented composer with a love for classical music! His newest album is titled, "I'll Be Bach."
- I went to the supermarket dressed as a classical composer... Somebody asked me what I was Chopin for.
- Why did everyone hate the classical composer's music Everyone thought he had some sheet music
- What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his 3rd grade teacher asked him to be a classical composer in the school play ? I'll be Bach
- Do you know which classical composer was also really into motocross? Braaaaaaahms, Braaaahms, Braaaaaaahms ... Brr Brr, Braaaaaaahms!
- Did you hear about the guy who tripped over his collection of classical composer statues? They said he Baroque his Bach.
- Would you like my movie about a classical composer travelling through time? I'm calling it "Bach to the future" for now.
Composer Name Jokes
Here is a list of funny composer name jokes and even better composer name puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Someone asked me to name my favorite composer... It made me Bach. I couldn't get a Handel on it. I had to make a Liszt.
- So I phoned my friend to ask him why he's been calling me the names of different composers, but he didn't answer... He hasn't called me Bach yet.
- I just remembered the name of the cellist who composed the song "Carpe Diem" #YOLO Ma
Witty Composer Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about composer you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean producer jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make composer pranks.
A goose's beak is composed of hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen and potassium.
HONK
Shortly after Mozart's death, all his music started disappearing but people couldn't figure out why.
Turns out he was just de-composing in his grave.
Strange music
In Vienna, the great composer Mr. Beethoven had recently died and been buried in the city cemetery, with much mourning by the Viennese citizens.
A few nights after the burial, the town drunk is stumbling on his way home through the cemetery. All of a sudden he hears some very strange-sounding music wafting up from Beethoven's fresh burial plot. Terrified, the man runs through the streets, screaming about ghosts in the graveyard.
Pretty soon he's gathered quite a crowd around the grave, all muttering to each other about devils and ghosts. Finally one man makes his way to the front of the crowd, squats down by the grave, and listens.
"Why... that's Beethoven's Ninth Sympony, but... it's playing backwards!" He listens some more. "There's his Eighth Symphony, also backwards! ... And the seventh.... sixth..."
Finally he stands up and addresses the crowd. "My good people, you have nothing to fear. This is simply Mr. Beethoven decomposing."
Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone are planning a costume party
and the theme is composers. Bruce tells the other stars, "I'll dress up as Mozart". Sylvester responds, "I'd be a great Beethoven". As the two are planning their costumes, Arnold checks the time and notices he's late for an appointment. As he hurries out the door, Bruce and Stallone ask "Hey, Arnold, who'll you dress up as? Arnold responds, as he walks out of the room, "I'll be Bach".
Be verbs.
The teacher asked the class to stand one by one and compose a simple sentence using appropriate be verbs.
"She is beautiful", said Kate.
"My dogs are fat", shouted Mark.
"I is...", stuttered Joe when the teacher interrupted.
"You always say 'I am'. Never say 'I is'", said she.
As fast as he could, Joe uttered,
"I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
THE GOVINATOR
Jean Claude Van Dam, Steven Segal, and Arnold Schwarzenagger all decide to go out trick-or-treating as musical composers for Halloween. They go into a costume store and look for masks. Jean Claude sees a costume that he likes and says, "I think I'll go as Beethoven." Steven Segal sees a costume that grabs his attention and says, "I'll be Mozart." Arnold had a tough time finding a costume that he liked, but he eventually found one that appeased his interest. He picks up a costume and said, "I'll be Bach."
Every time a famous music composer dies...
... he starts decomposing.
Steven Spielberg, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone are in a bar
After a few drinks Steven says he's thinking about making an action movie about classical composers
Sylvester says "I wanna be Mozart!"
Arnold says "in that case...I'll be Bach"
So there's this school play...
Sylvester Stallone, Chuck Norris, and Arnold Schwarzenegger have to put on a play featuring their favorite musical composers. They each toil over who they will play, until the next day they meet.
Stallone goes first.
"I'll be Mozart"
Next up is Chuck Norris.
"I'll be Beethoven".
Happy that no one picked his composer, Arnold announces "I'll be Bach".
You know the old saying: If it ain't Baroque...
...then it was probably written by more experimental composers after ~1760.
Did you hear that they're producing an action movie about a team of crime-fighting composers?
They already approached Arnold Schwarzenegger about playing fellow Austrian Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, but he said "no, I'll be Bach!"
A grave digger...
A grave digger hears a story about how Mozart had an unfinished song folded up in his coat pocket when he was buried.
The grave digger goes to the cemetery where Mozart was buried, and starts digging at the composer's grave.
The grave digger hits the coffin.
The grave digger opens the coffin, and sees Mozart holding the unfinished piece, and erasing each note on at a time.
The grave digger yells, "What are you doing?!"
Mozart responds with, "Decomposing."
Man achieves legendary status in composing music while being DEAF. But who is he?
ClickBeethoven
Some actors were planning to make a movie on famous composers
Arnold Schwarzenegger, Leonardo DiCaprio and Tom Hanks were all making a movie about famous composers. Leo said, "I'd like to play Beethoven." Tom said, "I'd like to play Mozart." Arnie said "I'll be Bach"
Did you know Kevin Spacey was a composer?
His most famous song is titled *Drunk Mistake* in A minor.
What is Beethoven doing now?
De-composing
"My favourite musical composer has gone missing!"
"Don't worry, I've got your Bach"
What's the difference between JR Smith and a bad music composer?
One of them still knows the score
A catholic choir is composing their own material.
Sweet Gsus, but I think what we need here is A minor.
The Librarian
What time does the library open? the man on the phone asked.
Annoyed, the librarian composed himself before he answered.
9 am, came the reply. And what's the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?
Not until 9 am? the man asked in a disappointed voice.
The librarian began to get angry.
No, not until 9 am, said the librarian. Why do you want to get in before 9 am?
Who said I wanted to get in? the man sighed sadly. I want to get o
A border patrol official comes into the Oval Office and says to Trump...
"Sir, because of the trauma of being separated from their parents, three Brazilian children fell deeply sick last night." Trump looks absolutely devastated. He sinks back in his chair, murmuring "oh my god" to himself over and over. Then he composes himself and says: "Okay. Just remind me, how many are there in a brazillion?"
This guy said he was going to compose an atheist theme song ....
I suggested, "Don't START believing".
That's a lot of zeros
An aide comes into the Oval Office and says to Trump:
"Sir, three Brazilian solders were killed in Afghanistan last night."
Trump looks absolutely devastated, nobody's ever seen him like this.
He sinks back in his chair, saying oh my god over and over.
Then he composes himself and says:
Okay. Just remind me, how many are there in a brazillion?"
Arnold Schwarzenegger's girlfriend broke up with him
Arnold Schwarzenegger's girlfriend broke up with him in hopes that it would be enough to stop him from dressing up as classical composers for halloween.
But deep down, she still knew that he'd be bach.
A farmer bragged to his friend about his smart chickens
"How do you know they're smart?"
"They love classical music! That's smarty-pants music right there."
"And how do you know that's what they like?"
"Every morning, I say to the chickens 'What music for today?' and they ask for their favorite composer: 'Bach, Bach, Bach!'"
Sylvester Stallone, Chuck Norris and Arnold Schwarzenegger are sitting in a restaurant, and Sylvester Stallone is like: "Guys, we should make a movie with the three of us, but I'm all out of ideas at the moment, I'm kind of bored with the standard action flicks."
Chuck says: "Don't you have any ideas?"
"Yeah, this may sound silly, but I was actually thinking about doing a movie on great classical composers"
That's when Arnold trows himself in the conversation and says: "That sounds like a great idea! Sylvester, you can be Mozart, and Chuck can be Beethoven!"
"And who will you be, Arnold?"
"I'll be Bach."
There was a time where all musicians and composers were broke
It was during the Baroque period.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
General approaches the Bugler
The General went to the company Bugler.
I understand that you're something of a composer. One of my senior officers has been run over by a tank, and I'd like you to write a f**... dirge for him.
No sweat.
What key will you compose it in?
It would be fitting to use A flat major.
Rest in Peace
A well known Hollywood actress died in an accident and her numerous friends got together to hire the country's highest paid poet to compose an epitaph for her.
When the stone was laid across the top, it read:
"At last, she sleeps alone."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why are sports bets i**... for the composer?
He arranges the score
Which company should hire Amber Heard as their next model ?
Pampers
Ps Original composed by me if anyone cares
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a hungarian Composer with one leg shorter than the other?
Liszt.
I went to Germany, stood outside a famous baroque composer's house, and pondered the meaning of life.
That's what you call thinking outside the Bach's.
Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger are talking about making a new film together.
Sly: I wanna show the world that we're more than just action movie stars. I wanna make a movie about classical music and classical composers. I know you guys love that stuff too. What do you think? Will you help me make a movie about it and show the world how cultured we are?
Bruce: I could play Beethoven. I've always wanted to play a tortured genius
Sly: You would be great. And I'll be Tchaikovsky. What about you Arnie?
Arnie: I'll be Bach
