complex Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious complex puns

What's the difference between Donald Trump and a worm?

One of them is a slimy, loathsome creature incapable of complex thought, the other one actually shows up when it rains.

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I have a phobia of over-engineered buildings.

It's a complex complex complex.

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I have an inferiority complex

....But it's not a very good one.

:(

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Why are relationships complex?

Because you're real, but your girlfriend is imaginary

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How to get free internet @ home

I live in an apartment complex so I have neighbors left to right and below me. One day I asked my neighbor if he was interested in splitting the cost of my wifi 50/50 so he could also use it. He agreed. I went on to my other neighbor downstairs and asked him the same thing. Now both my neighbors are paying for my wifi.

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I made a lot of stupid mistakes as a kid.

Now that I'm an adult, I'm making far more advanced and complex mistakes.

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If BJ is Bad Joke then what is B+iJ?

Complex Bad Joke.

And if you didn't find it funny, that's because the Joke part was imaginary.

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I knew a guy who had an irrational fear of overly intricate clusters of commercial buildings.

He had a complex complex complex.

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I have an irrational fear of large intricate corporate buildings.

You could say I have a complex complex complex.

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Two nuns are remodeling a new complex for the blind.

They are painting and get really hot and decide to take off their habits. A little bit later due to the heat they decide to just get completely naked and paint. Later that afternoon there is a knock on the door, in a panic the nuns ask "who is it?" Man replies "blind guy". They breath a sigh of relief and let him in. He walks in and says " hey nice tits where do you want the blinds?"

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CREATE PASSWORD -

"123Bob".

Password must contain no names, be complex and have over 50 characters.

"GameOfThrones"

Password accepted.

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My relationship is complex

part real, part imaginary.

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I'm in a complex relationship

My girlfriend is imaginary.

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I think everyone has a superiority complex

except for me

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Why couldn't the A level student date the IB student?

Because a + ib is complex.

(It's a math joke.)

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I found out my friend is addicted to math.

I should have known. All the sines were there. He had a hard time functioning, and he would go off on tangents all the time. Such a shame - he was in his prime, his life was on a great vector. He wanted to write the next 'Matrix'. But now, he can't differentiate between what is real and what is imaginary. It's so complex. I'm afraid his problems will start to multiply exponentially, and he just doesn't understand the root of it all. Pretty soon he won't be able to integrate at all. And just to add to the trouble, those he defines as 'friends' just want to divide his space between themselves. I'm afraid soon he'll go off into the Great Unknown...

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A multimillionaire goes to a psychologist

So, the multimillionaire is lying there on the couch, and he says, "I have this problem where I buy things. Big things, little things. It doesn't matter if it's a good deal or not. It doesn't matter whether or not I need it. It's the thrill of the purchase. In fact, yesterday I pulled out my wallet, and I bought an entire mall."

So the psychologist thinks for a little while, and finally says, "Then it sounds like you have a shopping complex."

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Boy VS Girl Friends

A Girl is giving directions to her new boyfriend to get to her apartment.
She says: You come to the front door of the apartment complex where I live and look for apartment 14A, and with your elbow push button 14A. Come inside and you'll find the elevator on the right. With your elbow hit 14. When you get out of the elevator you'll find my apartment on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell and I'll open the door for you
The boyfriend says: Dear, that sounds very easy to find, but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow ?
Oh my God!! You're not coming empty-handed, are you?

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I have a superiority complex

It's literally my ONLY flaw.

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So this general contractor...

Is working on the 5th floor of a new apartment complex, he takes a measurement then goes to his tools for his handsaw, only to see that it wasn't with his stuff. After looking around the floor a bit he steps onto the half-built balcony to look down at his truck. Lo and behold, his handsaw is sitting right on his bumper. He's about to walk downstairs to get it when he sees his apprentice approaching the truck. The boss yells and gets his attention, but the apprentice can't seem to make out what he's saying through the distance and all the sounds of construction.

The boss thinks for a second and starts motioning with his hands: first he points to his eye... "I"

Then he points to his knee..."need"

Then he points at himself and makes a sawing motion with his hand..."my saw"

The apprentice considers for a second, unzips his pants and starts masturbating furiously.

The contractor can't believe his eyes, and stares for 5...10...15 seconds then gets fed up, cursing his whole way down the stairs.
When he finally gets to his truck, the apprentice is still there tugging away.

"WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I SAID I NEEDED MY SAW" fumes the boss

"I know" replied the kid... "I said I was coming"

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How many Mexicans does it take to replace a serviceable part of a complex machine?

Just Juan and Emmanuel.

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The customer is always right :)

So a guy is walking around in a recently built, mostly vacant shopping complex and notices that one of the shops on his line is open. He walks in and finds 2 guys at the counter and inquires as to what they are selling. One of the guys decides to be smart and says: "We're selling ass holes". To which the passer by replies : "business must be good, there's only 2 of you left".

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I was always a home builder

but lately I've developed an apartment complex.

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I can't stand Freud...

him and his motherfucking complex.

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Yo mamma is so ugly...

I don't understand your Oedipus complex.

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They had to shut down the T-Rex cloning program at the Oedipus Complex.

It was on the news this morning. Apparently, the entire staff was eaten by mother-fucking dinosaurs.

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I wanted to go out for Valentine's day, but my relationship is complex

I'm real, she's imaginary.

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Your mama is so fat...

The NSA had to build a 2 billion dollar complex to store her weight information.

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So 3 men die and go to heaven...

So three men die and go heaven- a chemist, an idiot, and a mathematician.

When they get to the pearly gates of heaven, St. Peter is standing there, and says "Alright heaven is getting full, so to get into heaven, you have to ask me a question that I do not know the answer to.
The mathematician goes first, and asks St. Peter what the most complex mathmatical equation is. St. Peter pulls out a scroll, and reads the mathematician the equation. The mathematician is whisked away into hell. The chemist goes next. He asks St. Peter the most complex chemical formula, and again, St. Peter pulls out a scroll. He reads the most complex chemical formula, and the chemist is whisked to hell. The idiot goes next. He asks St. Peter for a drill, and a wooden chair. The chair and drill appear in front of them, and the idiot proceeds to drill 6 holes into the seat of the chair, and then sits down on the chair. The idiot lets a huge fart rip. He asks St. Peter which hole he farted out of. St. Peter sniffs each hole. St. Peter then asks "Was it hole number 4?"
The idiot says"Wrong! I farted out of my asshole!"

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Did you hear the joke about thr guy with the Midas Touch and an Oediupus Complex....

It's pure, motherfucking gold!

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Have you heard about the new condo complex for lesbians?

It's all tongue in groove construction. Not a stud in the whole place.

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The Wishing Cliff

There was a cliff in the middle of the desert that if a person jumped off of it and shouted out their greatest desire they would safely land in a large pile of that object at the bottom. Three friends make the trip but are very skeptical. They decide to start out on something simple and safe and work their way up to more complex wishes. The first friend runs and jumps and yells "Money!" And sure enough he safely lands in a pile of money. The second friend gets a little braver and runs and yells "Naked Ladies!" and sure enough he lands right in the middle of an orgy of naked ladies. They saved the biggest wish for last and the two at the bottom looked up in anticipation as the last friend got ready to go. He gets a running start but trips on a rock as he jumps and yells "Oh Shit!"

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If God were an engineer...

3 Engineers are sitting at the bar, having a conversation along the lines of "If God were an engineer, what kind of engineer would he be?"

The Mechanical Engineer: "Obviously he was mechanical. Look at the joints, the complex range of motion, the connective tissue. Mechanical Engineer for sure!"

The Electrical Engineer: "No way. Electrical. Look at that brain! All the nerves, neurons, every little electrical impulse that ties it together! Must've been Electrical!

The Civil Engineer: Takes a sip of his drink. "Nope. I can say for a fact that the human body was designed by a Civil Engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreation area?"

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One evening a husband comes home to his apartment...

...and he's very roughed up. When his wife sees him she asks, "What happened to you?"

"I got into a fight with the apartment complex manager."

"Whatever for?"

"He said he had slept with every woman in the complex except one!"

The woman replied, "I bet it's that snooty Mrs. Gellar on the third floor."

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There's nothing wrong with being a self-made man...

Unless you have an Oedipus complex and a time machine.

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What are the most funny Complex jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Complex? Well, here are the best Complex dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Complex pick up lines to share with friends.

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