Complaints Jokes

Following is our collection of unheard puns and allegations one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Complaints jokes for adults, dirty merciless jokes and clean chores dad gags for kids.

The Best Complaints Puns

A feminist and a Muslim walk into a bar.

- comedy removed due to complaints -

Mod Announcement: Due to complaints from our fair-haired readers, blonde jokes are no longer allowed...

...because they couldn't read them.

Pinocchio has been getting complaints from his girlfriend....

Pinnochio had been getting complaints from his girlfriend. "Every time we make love," she said, "I get splinters. "
So
Pinocchio went back to his maker, Gipetto the carpenter, for advice.
"Sandpaper," said the carpenter. "That's what you need. " So
Pinocchio took some sheets of sandpaper and went home. A few weeks later the carpenter bumped into Pinocchio again. "How are you getting on with the girls now? " he asked. "Who needs girls? " said
Pinocchio."

Customer compliants

A man boards a plane with six kids. After they get settled in their seats, a woman sitting across the aisle leans over to him and asks, "Are all of those kids yours?" He replies, "No. I work for a condom company. These are customer complaints."

A Man Got On A Plane...

A man gets on a plane with six children. A woman leans across the aisle and asks "Are all those children yours?" He answers, "No, I work for a condom company. These are customer complaints."


Inner Strength

If you can start the day without caffeine,

If you can resist complaints and excessively loud people,

If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,

If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,

If you can relax without liquor,

If you can sleep without the aid of drugs...

If you can do all of these things, then you are probably a dog

Being a 6'3 comedian...

a lot of my jokes revolve around short people. However, after receiving multiple complaints, ive decided to stop making short jokes now.

I'm above that.

A Boy giving Complaints.

Kid: mom, some kid is calling me gay

mama: Hit him, in the face.

Kid: I cant

Mom: Why?

Kid: Cause, he's so Cute!!

My dog likes to chase people on a bike.

I got frustrated from all the complaints so I took the bike away from him.

I got complaints about my dog chasing people on bikes

I didnt know my dog could ride a bike

World War 2 fans have their own set of complaints....

"I can't believe Hitler blew an 11 country lead!"


Investigation finds rise in complaints regarding worker incompetence at Quiznos locations

> "Whoops, wrong sub"

The police came to my house after getting complaints about my dogs chasing people on bikes.

I told them that's ridiculous. My dogs can't ride bikes.

A man went into a cafe and sat his six children at a table...

A woman asked him, "Are all of those children yours?"


"No, I work for a condom company...these are customer complaints."

Magic Elixir of Life

A man was walking through Sarasota selling door to door what he claimed to be the "Magic Elixir of Life."

Of course there were complaints and the police arrested him. They ran a background check of him and found the man had quite a long record of such dealings. He was first arrested for that type of crime in England . . . . in 1660.

I didn't quite get my girlfriend's complaints about my passion for Grease songs...

So I asked her to tell me more, tell me more.

The police knocked on my door the other night...

...and informed me that they were there to take my dog away. Apparently there had been complaints that he was chasing down and barking at my neighbors' son on his bike.

I happen to know, however, that my dog doesn't ride a bike.

Everyone knows Charles Dickens as a famous author of great classics. Lesser known is his short-lived Apple Cider business. He had to close it after complaints of unexpected pregnancies.

It may seem strange, but what do you expect when you have Dickens Cider?

A man hires a $10 hooker and gets crabs...

He goes back with the hooker and complaints , she says "what were you expecting for 10 bucks? Lobster?"


I get complaints that my dog is chasing people on bike

I didnt take this as a problem until i realized he has been using my motorcycle

Customer complaints

A 20 something gentleman is at the airport and tries to buy a 15 tickets. She looks behind the man to see 14 children behind him. She asks if they were all his. He says no that he works for Trojan and they were all customer complaints.

The Sales Man

A man carrying 6 babies in a train. A lady sitting next 2 him asked,"are these ur babies?
"No I'm a condom salesman & these are Customer Complaints..

The U.S. postal services came out with a new Donald Trump stamp. Although they received many complaints that they were defective!

After polling the public on how the stamp is defective, they figured out nothing was wrong with the stamp at all!

The americans were just not spitting on the right side!

A group of Cytologists are arrested...

and are thrown into jail. Since these are privileged folks, they're put into a special jail where they live a single common living space, without separate rooms.

The cytologists start submitting complaints immediately to the state. Because without cells, it doesn't meet living conditions.

Dear Algebra

Please stop asking me to find your X, who left you and I don't know Y. Constant complaints will result in elimination.

Where do you go to get fresh complaints?

The whinery.

A man boarded a plane with 16 kids

Attendant: Welcome sir, are all of them your kids. You surely have a big family

Man: Nah, I work for a condom company. These are consumer complaints

Where does lumber go to file complaints?

The Board.

I have many complaints about women with kitty rings

and that's just scratching the surface

This guy kept telling people Reagan National Airport was wayyy too loud...

but the complaints fell on deaf ears.

A man enter a resturant

A waitress walks towards him and says, "I'm sorry but you can't eat here we have had a lot of complaints due to your behavior".
The man replies, "I'm sorry, you must confuse me with someone else, i've never been here before". "I'm so sorry sir, what do you want?". The man then answers "Just the usual, please"

The Police Were Called To The Circus...

...to arrest the whole of the Prague trampoline team after complaints that six Czechs has bounced.

Humans first started practicing circumcision over 15,000 years ago.

There were a lot less complaints once they mastered it.

Complaints via email or texts should be called "Read Whine"

"We've had complaints about you," said my boss.

"What are they?" I asked.

"They're what people make when they aren't happy with something," my boss replied.

Two strippers at a night club had a routine together...

...but their dance moves and styles were so off, they often got complaints from the patrons. After being confronted by their manager, one stripper said to the other, "We just gotta get our act right. We gotta learn t'werk together."

Why doesn't anyone listen to complaints by Furries?

Because they only have furs twirled problems.

There is an abundance of assembly jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 37 funniest jokes and complaints puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any management witze you can hear about complaints.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes