Complaint Jokes
65 complaint jokes and hilarious complaint puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about complaint that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
A perfect way to tell it like it is - Complaint Jokes! Get in on the newest customer complaint trend sweeping the internet and find out where to take your grievances directly. Learn what's at stake when you approach the complaint department, the impact of leaking allegations, and more. Start reading now!
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Funniest Complaint Short Jokes
Short complaint jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The complaint humour may include short lawsuit jokes also.
- What is the quietest place on Earth? The complaint department at a parachute packing company.
- Went to the gym earlier, and while working out I noticed a hole in my trainer... just big enough to get my finger in. Anyway....she filed a formal complaint and I'm banned for life
- A teenage girl went to visit the doctor for her cough complaint. The doctor examined her with his stethoscope. 'Big breaths' he said. 'Yeah, and I am only thixteen' she replied.
- I purchased some noise canceling headphones... I thought people would find them annoying but so far I haven't heard any complaints.
- So Hawaii recently made a new law in regards to noise and the increase of noise complaints due to an uprising in loud laughter. They now have to use a low ha
- Being a 6'3 comedian... a lot of my jokes revolve around short people. However, after receiving multiple complaints, ive decided to stop making short jokes now.
I'm above that. - So Lena finishes dead last in the breastroke... She immediately filed a complaint with the officials, because the other girls were using their arms.
- My wife is not happy with me and said that I'm 'too formal'. I've sent her a letter of complaint...
- I got complaints about my dog chasing people on bikes I didnt know my dog could ride a bike
- Investigation finds rise in complaints regarding worker incompetence at Quiznos locations > "Whoops, wrong sub"
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Complaint One Liners
Which complaint one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with complaint? I can suggest the ones about protest and compliment.
- A feminist and a Muslim walk into a bar. - comedy removed due to complaints -
- I hosted a silent disco party in my apartment I got a complaint from the mime next door.
- What do you call a random complaint in Star Wars? A General Grievance.
- What do you call a cockroach filing a complaint? A Bug report
- Where do you go to get fresh complaints? The whinery.
- An atheist walks into heaven... ...goes immediately to the complaint department.
- Where does lumber go to file complaints? The Board.
- Complaints via email or texts should be called "Read Whine"
- If I had a $ for every complaint I've seen this week about the FCC...
- I got a noise complaint for playing my drums late at night. Now I just play piano.
- What was the head hunter's complaint about his career path? He couldn't get ahead.
- What is the best way to write a complaint to the NSA? Save a draft on your email.
- What do you call a group of Karens? A complaint.
Complaint Department Jokes
Here is a list of funny complaint department jokes and even better complaint department puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Our complaint department manager is Helen Waite. So if you have a complaint go to Helen Waite.
Customer Complaint Jokes
Here is a list of funny customer complaint jokes and even better customer complaint puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- The arrogant baker declared 'You'll never hear a complaint about my doughnuts outside this shop window' The customer agreed 'It must be the double glazing'
Playful Complaint Jokes to Add Joy and Laughter to Your Group
What funny jokes about complaint you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean appeal jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make complaint pranks.
Pinocchio has been getting complaints from his girlfriend....
Pinnochio had been getting complaints from his girlfriend. "Every time we make love," she said, "I get splinters. "
So
Pinocchio went back to his maker, Gipetto the carpenter, for advice.
"Sandpaper," said the carpenter. "That's what you need. " So
Pinocchio took some sheets of sandpaper and went home. A few weeks later the carpenter bumped into Pinocchio again. "How are you getting on with the girls now? " he asked. "Who needs girls? " said
Pinocchio."
What was the under-appreciated, often-exploited kitchen contractor's complaint?
I'm always taken for granite!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Hair Fragrance
Every day at the office, a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady standing at the coffee machine, inhales a big breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice.
After a week of this, she can't stand it anymore, takes her complaint to a supervisor in the personnel department and states that she wants to file a s**... harassment grievance against him.
The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled by this decision and asks, "So what's s**... threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?"
The woman replies, "It's Keith, the midget."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Mod Announcement: Due to complaints from our fair-haired readers, blonde jokes are no longer allowed...
...because they couldn't read them.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Sales Man
A man carrying 6 babies in a train. A lady sitting next 2 him asked,"are these ur babies?
"No I'm a c**... salesman & these are Customer Complaints..
The police knocked on my door the other night...
...and informed me that they were there to take my dog away. Apparently there had been complaints that he was chasing down and barking at my neighbors' son on his bike.
I happen to know, however, that my dog doesn't ride a bike.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three year old goes to prison.
A police officer was investigating a noise complaint coming from a daycare in downtown Detroit. The officer realized that it was just a three year old kid k**... and screaming because he didn't want to nap during nap time. The officer charged the child with resisting a rest, and took him to prison.
A man enter a resturant
A waitress walks towards him and says, "I'm sorry but you can't eat here we have had a lot of complaints due to your behavior".
The man replies, "I'm sorry, you must confuse me with someone else, i've never been here before". "I'm so sorry sir, what do you want?". The man then answers "Just the usual, please"
A man by the name of Ronald Bates came home to find his butler being arrested...
"What in the world could my butler have done to be arrested?" Bates asked the police officer handcuffing the butler.
"We had a complaint from you next door neighbor that he was yelling obscene remarks," the police officer replied.
"Obscene remarks?!?! What was he saying?!?!"
"The neighbors say that, for a few minutes on end, he kept yelling 'Masturbates,' 'Masturbates!'
Magic Elixir of Life
A man was walking through Sarasota selling door to door what he claimed to be the "Magic Elixir of Life."
Of course there were complaints and the police arrested him. They ran a background check of him and found the man had quite a long record of such dealings. He was first arrested for that type of crime in England . . . . in 1660.
Al Sharpton goes to Best Buy
Al Sharpton heads into best buy and is browsing the appliance section. He calls over a young white male employee.
Al: Hey young man, I'd like to register a complaint.
Best Buy Guy: What seems to be the issue sir?
Al: Well you see son, all of these washers are white! This is outrageous!
Best Buy Guy: (opens the lid and points inside the machine) Well if you look inside sir, you'll see that all the agitators are black.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Customer complaints
A 20 something gentleman is at the airport and tries to buy a 15 tickets. She looks behind the man to see 14 children behind him. She asks if they were all his. He says no that he works for t**... and they were all customer complaints.
An office worker opened his pay envelope to find
his check was short $100. He called the accounting department to voice his complaint.
"You're right, we made a mistake," said the clerk, "but last week we overpaid you $100 and we didn't hear you complaining then."
"Look," said the man, "I can overlook one mistake. But two weeks in a row?"
I'm going to be filing a complaint with the shampoo company...
My girlfriend recently dumped me and this "No Tears" stuff isn't working at all.
I was at the gym the other day....
I was at the gym the other day and I noticed a hole in my trainer big enough to put my finger in !.
Anyways he made a formal complaint and now I'm banned for life.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
World War 2 fans have their own set of complaints....
"I can't believe h**... blew an 11 country lead!"
I went to the gym and found a hole in my trainer big enough to get my finger in...
She raised a complaint and now I'm banned for life.
Everyone knows Charles Dickens as a famous author of great classics. Lesser known is his short-lived Apple Cider business. He had to close it after complaints of unexpected pregnancies.
It may seem strange, but what do you expect when you have Dickens Cider?
A group of Cytologists are arrested...
and are thrown into jail. Since these are privileged folks, they're put into a special jail where they live a single common living space, without separate rooms.
The cytologists start submitting complaints immediately to the state. Because without cells, it doesn't meet living conditions.
Inner Strength
If you can start the day without caffeine,
If you can resist complaints and excessively loud people,
If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,
If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,
If you can relax without liquor,
If you can sleep without the aid of drugs...
If you can do all of these things, then you are probably a dog
I didn't quite get my girlfriend's complaints about my passion for Grease songs...
So I asked her to tell me more, tell me more.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
New cuisines
I went to a Chinese/ German fusion buffet today for lunch. I had the Szechuan Schnitzel with sweet and sour k**.... It was pretty good. My only complaint is that an hour later I was hungry...
For POWER!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Every day a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady at the coffee machine, inhales a big breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice.
After a week of this she can't stand it anymore, takes her complaint to a Supervisor in the personnel department and asks to file a s**... harassment grievance against him.
The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled, and asks: What's threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?
The woman replies: It's Frank, the midget.
Me, on the phone: I have a complaint. Every time I make a sandwich, it's always too dry.
Guy on the other end: Sir, that's not what we do at the Mayo Clinic.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Every day a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady at the coffee machine
He inhales a big breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice.
After a week of this she can't stand it anymore, takes her complaint to a Supervisor in the personnel department and asks to file a s**... harassment grievance against him.
The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled, and asks: What's threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?
The woman replies: It's Frank, the midget.
A man went to the doctor for a routine checkup
He was generally well, just thought it was a good idea to check in. The doctor, however, immediately reached for the covid swab.
"I'm going to test you for Covid19" the Doctor said.
"But I'm well, no complaints, why would you do that?" Replied the man.
"Well..." The doctor started, his gaze narrowing. "Loss of taste is a known symptom of the virus, and you're wearing Crocs."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man boards a plane with six kids
After they get settled in their seats, a woman sitting across the aisle leans over to him and asks, "Are all of those kids yours?" He replies, "No, I work for a c**... company, these are customer complaints."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a gathering of Karen's?
What do you call a gathering of Karen's?
A group of Karen's is called a complaint!
Mr. Green is reading a newspaper by the pool.
A lifeguard walks up and quietly says "Mr. Green there have been some complaints by the other guests."
Mr. Green puts down his paper. "Well I'm sure there isn't much of an issue."
The lifeguard continues, "it appears someone has been peeing in the pool."
"Everyone pees in the pool." Mr. Green stated plainly.
The lifeguard shouts "from the high dive Mr. Green?!?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I made a smoking s**... playlist for me and my girlfriend
Her complaint was that it was only 30 seconds long.
A study by the Bureau of Consumer Protection has determined that the most common first name on consumer complaints is actually "Sharon."
My kindergarten teacher was right. Sharon is Karen.
I'm learning sign language…
Not sure if I'm any good at it, but I never heard any complaint.
