The Best 49 Competitive Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Competitive jokes. There are some competitive vie jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these competitive contest puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Competitive Jokes and Puns

We're pretty competitive

My brother and I sometimes laugh on how competitive we can be, but I laugh more!

A new craze sweeps an Eastern European nation

Though Transylvania is mostly rivers and mountains, a new outdoor sport is achieving newfound popularity. Folks have been flocking to the calmer parts of the Olt and Danube to try out for a crew, the competitive paddling fad usually found in lakes. In fact, the sport has spread from the region to the whole country.

Truly, the nation has Ro-mania.

Do competitive origami artists ever fold under pressure?

Competitive joke, Do competitive origami artists ever fold under pressure?

My friend and I were finally able to laugh off how competitive we are with each other.

But I laughed harder.

My brother and I laugh at how Competitive we were as kids.

But I laugh more.

Why did the competitive deep-sea diver lose the big competition?

He couldn't handle the pressure.

What do you get with legalized prostitution and a highly competitive marketplace?

The best bang for your buck.

Competitive joke, What do you get with legalized prostitution and a highly competitive marketplace?

My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are

But I laugh more.

new way to pay

A company in India is coming out with a competitive PayPal alternative called PayMyFriend.

You know what the definition of "competitive" is?

Finishing first *and* third in a circlejerk.

I don't want to be racist....

so stop trying to make me to take up competitive running!

You can explore competitive medal reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean competitive hearthstone dad jokes. There are also competitive puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

"Oh my god! Sarah Jessica Parker is a competitive sprinter?!"

"Greg, calm down! This is just the Kentucky Derby."

My girlfriend and I joke about which of us is more competitive.

But, I joke about it waaaay more than her.

To get in shape, I need to pick up a sport as a hobby...

I was thinking about competitive eating.

I'm not a competitive person

I'll be the first to admit it.

"You snooze, you lose."

-Competitive insomniacs

Competitive joke, "You snooze, you lose."

You're a rising star in the competitive masturbation circuit who's in LA for the WBC (World Bate Championships).

Don't choke.

Everyone jokes about running away and joining the circus. But I hear they have a great 401K program and competitive benefits.

Too bad the pay is peanuts.

What do competitive butchers say to each other?

I will beat your meat!

My friend and I sometimes laugh at how competitive we are.

I laugh more.

My friend made a flute out of a carrot...

It was impressive, and if you gave her some sheet music, she would show you just how well it played.

My other friend, who's a bit competitive, made an oboe out of corn. He said he could play anything by ear.

It's a good thing mutual masturbation isn't a competitive sport...

...because I'd always beat you.

My dad was so Competitive that on his death bed, as he breathed his last

He said, "Staring contest... GO."

The competitive seamstress guild is accepting applicants.

Despite all the race conditions since they went global, they do get a lot of stuff done concurrently.

TIL cow tipping is an urban myth.

Apparently, the farmers just pay them a competitive wage.

I'm filming a documentary about high-stakes competitive beekeeping

I'm thinking about calling it "Game of Drones."

The Academy Awards have introduced a new category for the upcoming Oscars ceremony.

"Best Acting for shocked response to Weinstein revelations" is full of very competitive entries .

Why are most Taiwanese people competitive and ambitious?

Because of their Taipei personality.

My family are very competitive

In our secret Santa, winner takes all.

Why is Finland the most competitive country in the world?

You can't find a road, store, or park without a Finnish line.

I tried competitive eating once.

I was doing pretty well but I choked toward the end.

My wife says that I'm too competitive and its driving her insane

I told her I already knew that

Two guys from New York go on a cross-country trip and end up walking into a bar in Kansas.

After a few too many drinks, one of the guys asks the bartender, "Hey, can you tell us how to go cow tipping?" "I'm sorry, gentlemen. Cow tipping is simply an urban myth," the bartender explains. "The farmers actually pay them a competitive wage."

I always wanted to be a competitive eater

Unfortunately, I just never had the stomach for it


Judge: What made you go to the prison?

Criminal: Competition, Sir!

Judge: Competition?

Criminal: Yes, Sir, I made the same coins as the government did.

I hear Chinese tourists are aggressive and competitive.

They must have Taipei personalities.

There's a competitive gaming team called the Silver Snipers, consisting of old guys between 62-81 years old. So, are they any good?


My boyfriend and I always laugh about how competitive we are

But I laugh harder

I entered a pun competition

Being a competitive sort, I scoured my brains for my very best puns, sorting them and analysing them by punningness, and finally submitting my very best top ten puns. I was sure I would win, or at least one would make the medals table.

But unfortunately no pun in ten did.

A university has been accused of not having enough people of colour on their competitive speech recital team.

To tackle the problem they took a bunch of students and covered them in body paint.

They now claim they have achieved their dye varsity quoters.

Why do women hate me?

Cause I'm very competitive and always want to come first.

A new Vietnamese restaurant opened across from another, and the owners have been throwing competitive deals all week.

It was a Nguyen-Nguyen situation.

Competitive lumberjacking will never be a sport as it isn't a matter of skill

It just comes down to whoever has logged the most hours

If competitive lumberjacking is a sport...

...then Pinocchio would be a hall-of-famer.

Pete: hi, I'm Pete

**Peter:** hi, I'm Peter

**Me, super competitive:** I'm Petest

A lot of people thought bio-warfare was overpowered.

That's why it was banned from competitive use.

My brother and I often laugh at how competitive we are

I laugh more

I've had 3 years of casual sex

I guess I'm finally prepared for competitive sex.

My wife and I often laugh about how competitive we are..

..but I laugh more.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the competitive farthest jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working competitive winner piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes