It's my thirty-second birthday.
Zero fucks were given.
Unzip...
Nobody expects the Spanish Acquisition
I mean, wouldn't all those attack helicopters be useful??
Doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.
looks like I'm gonna have to write my name and the date again
...it's called Norton
They left a note on the windscreen. It said, "Parking fine", so that was nice.
It was an apple, and a very bad one at that. It only took one byte for everything to crash.
...was writing a note to his crush before lecture. The student next to him grabbed the note.
The first student tried to grab it back. You can't see that, it's private!
The second student protested, But we're in the same class
She says, "Buy a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen."
An hour later, he returns home with twelve loaves of bread. She asks,
"Why did you get twelve loaves of bread?" Her husband replies,
"Because they had eggs."
Because they let IT go
It came completely out of the green
The Make a Wish Foundation
I think it's A Dell.
Nobody expected the Spanish Acquisition.
and all of a sudden she is not your friend anymore.
It takes screenshots.
I don't know why she took it as an insult.
A man and woman are in a computer programming lecture. The man touches the woman's breasts.
"Hey!" she says. "Those are private!"
The man says, "But we're in the same class!"
they left a note on the car saying parking fine
So I beat my computer at kickboxing.
They don't like things that are "in".
A Dell.
It was an Apple with extremely limited memory: just one bite.
Then everything crashed.
That's the last time I buy A Dell.
Best trade I ever made.
...because they all got vaccinated as children, and obviously turned out retarded.
He takes a cigarette out of his pocket, lights it, and takes a puff.
His wife looks at him angrily and says,
"You really need to stop doing that. Can't you see the warning on the box? It says 'hazardous to health!'"
The programmer takes another puff of his cigarette and says,
"I'm a computer programmer. I don't care about warnings. I only care about errors."
I used to have a girlfriend but she ransomwareο»Ώ.
I WannaCry now... ;(
My girlfriend is imaginary.
My wife is standing & looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to me,'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to give me a compliment.'
I replied, 'Your eyesight's perfect.'
They left a little note on the windscreen that said 'Parking Fine'.
You can always serve as a bad example.
Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Comp? Well, here are the best Comp dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Comp pick up lines to share with friends.