Community Jokes
122 community jokes and hilarious community puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about community that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Check out this article to explore the funniest community jokes from inside and outside the community. Learn about the background and history of the community, from community college to community service. Discover the best jokes from the community whiteboard and even from the trids and Presbyterian community. Also, find out what the community is rightfully running!
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Funniest Community Short Jokes
Short community jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The community humour may include short church jokes also.
- One man in the crowd then yelled Yes, but is it the Catholic god you don't believe in or the Protestant one?
- Jussie smollet had to pay 10,000 to chicago and do community service to get his charge dropped... I hope he isnt beating himself up over this
- A photon checks into a hotel. The bellhop says "can I take your bags?"
"No," she answers, "I'm traveling light."
*(I'm new to the community, this is best I've got, I'm sorry)* - I was arguing with a flat Earth believer We argued about how many members the flat Earth community had. He said "We have members all around the globe".
- Did you hear the one about the LGBTQ2S+ community? They're working together to build the perfect password
- I have a lot of friends in the LGBTQ+ community and I kept asking them what it stands for I couldn't get a straight answer
- I helped my Community Theater put on a play about a Bakery. I wouldn't say I was the star... But I did play a roll
- Trump used to love the LGBTQ community... Until he found out it doesn't stand for "Loans Given By The Qataris"
- Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.
I love supporting the community. - The most toxic substances known to mankind. 1. Arsenic
2. Cyanide
3. Polonium
4. Mercury
5. The League of Legends community
Share These Community Jokes With Friends
Community One Liners
Which community one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with community? I can suggest the ones about neighbor and association.
- In my community we have a neighborhood watch, It's actually more like a clock tower.
- Why can't you argue with the LGBT community? Because they're not thinking straight.
- First Stephen Hawking, now Avicii? Tough year for the Electronic community.
- What do you call a poor Italian community? a spaghetto.
- What do you call a sad community of melons? A melancholy melon colony.
- A hole was discovered in the fence of a nudist community. Police are looking into it.
- The Flat Earth Community has supporters all around the globe.
- All cars support LGBT community. Afterall, they all have a trans mission.
- Why was the young Amish woman banished from her community? Two Mennonite
- What do you call an ant that's been shunned by his community? Socially dist-ant
- I'd like to give a shout out to protons- for keeping our community positive.
- Generation Z is best known for being hard-working ...within the Minecraft community.
- My pharmacist is very well respected... she's a real piller of the community.
- The scientific community has finally agreed to rename the planet Uranus to Urmama
- What do you call a pirate that goes to community college? Captain Blackboard
Community Service Jokes
Here is a list of funny community service jokes and even better community service puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I've been issued Community Service.. I was assigned the Recycling Program . I figured I'd start here since there's a lot of reused content which would reduce my searching.
- Tourist in America I was going to take my wife to visit all the sites where they protested the police shooting of innocent black men. But i've only got 6 months...plus community service.
- What do criminal courts in Spain call community service? Manuel labor
- I wanna do some community service this Thanksgiving... So I'm gonna go to the Indian reservations and hand out blankets
Community College Jokes
Here is a list of funny community college jokes and even better community college puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What's the difference between a blonde and a community college Well, they are both pretty easy to get into, but I don't have 3 community colleges under my basement. That would be ridiculous.
- Did you know that Vanilla Ice is now working as a computer literacy instructor? He's at the community college teaching word to your mother.
- I met my exgirlfriend while I was attending college... ... I went to the local community college, but she went to the Christian University of North Texas which explains a lot.
- The benefit of taking a job as an accounting teacher in a community college You never have to guess if you'll be broke.
- Girl, are you a community college? Because you're cheap, easy to get into, and people will settle for you if they can't do any better.
- My community college has a student lounge. My parents call it the living room.
- My Journey from $60k College Debt to $115k Net Worth & 816 credit score. And all thanks to this community! I started stand up and got beat up. Settlement has been a blessing!
- What's the difference between a blonde and community college? I don't have three community colleges under my basement
- My wife and I saw the local community college bus at Walmart yesterday and she said look, they are having a field trip. I said nah, they are having a career fair.
Comical Community Jokes to Spread Joy and Laughter
What funny jokes about community you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean culture jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make community pranks.
Why is everyone criticising EA?
I've only ever known EA as an excellent video game company and pioneer of the early home computer games industry. EA has always had my enjoyment as their primary concern and their community involvement is phenomenal.
($50 has been deposited into your Paypal account, remember to delete this part of the message before posting it).
What do you call an Optomitrist who is very highly thought of in his community?
Respectacle
The mailman
A mailman gets a new route in a rural community. Walking up to a isolated little farmhouse, he sees a woman out back getting hammered by a goat.
He looks at the kid sitting on the porch, and asks him "Hey kid, doesn't it bother you, what your mom's doing back there?"
The kid looks at him and says "NAAAAAAA!"
k**... Pastor
An Alabama pastor said to his congregation, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux k**....
This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who said this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family."
No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression." Again, all was quiet.
Then, slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop a runaway train rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, "Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux k**.... I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets."
An Atheist tourist was walking around Belfast ...
An Atheist tourist was walking around Belfast and noticed all the community centre events for either Catholics or Protestants. After checking out yet another board, he asked a staff member:
Atheist: "What do you do in this town if you're an Atheist?"
Staff member: "Well sir, that depends on whether you're a Catholic atheist or a Protestant atheist."
Math in the real world
Basic Math is the subject I teach at a small community college in western North Carolina. I call one part of the curriculum Practical Applications for Living in the Real World. The day after I presented a lesson on simple and compound interest, one of my older students approached me in the hallway. "You really taught me a great deal about my life yesterday," he said. "I realized I've been struggling with a lack of interest, compounded daily, for thirty years."
I recently learned that bison of eastern new york who are bullied by bison of the same region mimic the behavior upon the remainder of the community. In other words...
Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.
I'm having second thoughts about booking time to visit an Indian community.
I guess I'm having reservation reservation reservations.
In honor of Leif Erikson Day...
Leif Erikson returned to his village after many years sailing the ocean and discovering new lands. When he arrived home, he noticed his name was no longer in the town records. Puzzled, he visited the census-taker to inquire about the error.
"I've been a dedicated member of this community for many years. Why am I not on the town list?" he asked.
"I'm sorry about the mistake, Mr. Erikson," replied the clerk, "I must've taken Leif off my census!"
If you were to second guess your decision on booking a trip to a Native American community...
That would be a reservation reservation reservation!
I told my dentist to make my teeth whiter..
so he named them Logan and moved them to a gated community.
Why God never got a PhD
1. He had only one major publication.
2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English.
3. It has no references.
4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal.
5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself.
6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since
then?
7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.
8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results.
9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing.
10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his
subjects.
11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from
the sample.
12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book.
13. Some say he had his son to teach the class.
14. He expelled his first two students for learning.
15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students
failed his tests.
16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.
Donations
Son: "Dad, there is someone at the door to collect donations
for a community swimming pool."
Father: "Okay, give him a glass of water."
A priest is doing some community work downtown...
...when he is propositioned by a h**....
"Hey Father, I'll give the best b**... of your life for $10."
Confused, the priest replies "No thank you, my dear."
Later, back at the church, he approaches one of the nuns.
"Sister, this is kind of embarrassing, but what's a b**...?"
"Oh, you know," says the nun, "$10, same as downtown."
What street in Paris is well-known for its t**... community?
The Rue Paul.
A man's dog dies
A fine elderly Catholic gentleman lived alone in Southwest Florida in an upscale gated community except for his beloved dog that he had for a long time.
The dog finally died and the gent went to the parish priest, saying "Father, my dear dog is dead. Could you possibly be saying a Mass for the poor creature?"
Father Patrick told the grief stricken man "No, we can't have services for an animal in the church, but I'll tell you what, there's a Baptist church down the road, and no telling what they believe in, but maybe they'll do something for the animal."
The old fellow said "I'll go right now. Thank you Father...By the way, do you think $50,000 is enough to donate for the service?"
Father Patrick replied
"Why didn't you tell me the dog was Catholic."
What do the LGBT community and computers have in common?
Most people over 50 are scared of them and think they are destroying the fabric of society!
How did the medical community come up with the term "p**..."?
"Mad Cow Disease" was already taken.
Unfortunate sign in discount warehouse near a retirement community:
Shop till you drop!
Altoids has begun marketing to the LGBT community.
Their new mints are bi-curiously strong.
People doubt me when I mention how accepting Canada is towards the LGBT community.
But it's Trudeau.
Two nuns are biking back to their convent
after a long day out nunning about in the community.
They take a different route than normal, and after a while, one says to the other: "You know, I've never come this way before."
The other replies: "Yes, it must be the cobblestones"
A man came to my door today, and asked if I would donate to building the community pool
So I gave him a glass of water
I'm playing Monopoly with Donald Trump and Hilary Clinton...
Trump grabbed Community Chest as fast as he could, is building hotels on properties he doesn't really own and is refusing to pay income tax
Clinton started out with a house on Illinois Ave, somehow always has a "Get out of jail free" card and keeps saying she respects any opponent holding Vermont Ave
However, in the end, I have a feeling neither will be satisfied until they get a house on Pennsylvania Ave
Double positives
One day, during a lesson at the community college, the professor is explaining how a double negative will always be positive but a double positive can never be negative.
To which his student replies "yeah right"
What's the difference between a Tupperware store and the gay male community?
In a Tupperware store, there's an equal number of tops and bottoms
What's the LGBT community's favorite s**... position?
Sixty-*Nouns*
Did you hear about the teen s**... figures throughout the Muslim community?
It's exploded in the past few years
Florida Retirement Community...
A little old lady was sitting on a park bench in The Villages, a Florida Adult community.
A man walks over and sits down on the other end of the bench.
After a few moments, the woman asks, "Are you a stranger here?"
He replies, "I lived here years ago."
"So, where were you all these years?"
"In prison," he says.
"Why did they put you in prison?"
He looked at her and very quietly said, "I killed my wife."
"Oh!" exclaimed the woman. "So you're single?!"
A teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents.
They were appalled by his leather jacket, motorcycle boots, tattoos, and pierced nose. Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern. "Dear," the mother said, "he doesn't seem very nice."
"Oh please, Mom," the daughter replied. "If he wasn't nice, why would he be doing 200 hours of community service?"
He's a good boy.
A teenage girl is having a heated argument with her mother about her boyfriend, whom the mother does not like at all. "You can ground me, you can take my cell phone, but I am still seeing Roger". "I don't think he's any good" said mom. "He is too a good boy, why else would he be doing 200 hours of community service?".
Dear keyboard manufacturers, I'm writing to request a redesign so that g and t wouldn't be right next to each other
r**...
Why are rainbows used as a symbol to represent the gay community?
Because they're not straight.
Why do quantum computers make terrible community leaders?
Because you can never be sure of their true values.
Once upon a time
...there was a Chieftain who presided over a community that lived in the steppe, where everything was grassland as far as the eye could see, and almost no trees grew. Because of its rarity, wood was prized, and this Chieftain happened to own a large, ornate chair made of wood that was his most priceless possession.
Now in this community it was c
I told my ex to join the anti-vax community.
Clearly, he needs to be surrounding by other people who don't last long.
My b**... community took me to court for not being h**... enough. I got off with just a slap on the wrist.
So I lost the case.
It's flu season and I just saw 3 homeless people caring for each other.
They were giving each other flu shots under the overpass. What a caring community we live in God Bless.
Trump Supporters are demanding to join the LGBTQ+ community.
They say they identify as Non-Bidenary
My local church went bankrupt and someone turned it into a gun range.
The community didn't like it, but it already had pew pew pews.
Ivy League School Principal, Mr. Marquez, and Community College Principal, Mr. Davidson, were arguing that their respective students were the most fearless.
Ivy League school principal called his students and asked them to jump in sea full of sharks.
They jumped.
Principal said: See the guts…
Community College principal called his students and asked them to jump.
They said: "Have you completely lost your marbles, Mr. Davidson?"
Principal said: See the guts.
A gay woman, a working class white guy, an old Jewish lady, a disabled man and a young black lady all walk into a bar.
What a wonderful example of a well-integrated community.
There was a pun competition going on in the local community.
I decided I might have a go at it since I am pretty good with puns. The rules were simple: we all had to tell 10 puns. I got on stage and gave it my best shot to wow the judges. Sadly, no pun in ten did.
Some say cake is for special occasions
I say it is for exploiting the reddit community for upvotes!
A teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents.
They were appalled at his spiky hair, pierced nose, tattoos and a bad attitude. Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern. "Honey," the mother said, "he doesn't seem very nice."
"Of course he is," the daughter replied. "If he wasn't nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?"
I recently found out that the Origami school in our community is about to close for good...
I'll update more on this as it unfolds.
Homophobes assume that because I'm in the LGBTQ+ community I must have some kind of gay agenda.
... How many times do I have to explain to them? I'm non-binary! I don't have agenda at all!
Did you know that Brian May, the guitarist from British rockband Queen, has a PhD on Astrophysics?
Yeah, he started his schooling before Queen formed, and achieved his PhD in 2007. One of his dissertations is heavily criticized by the science community though, and it's because he has an odd theory of what causes the Earth's rotation.
You see, he thinks that 'Fat Bottomed Girls make the Rockin World go round.'
Two Polish Rocket Scientists Announce to the World They're Going to the Sun in a Spaceship
The entire world wide scientific community swiftly points out that the Sun is too hot for such a journey and they'd quickly burn up to which they replied very smugly: "Ah SEE! We've thought of this and have a plan!.....We're going at NIGHT!"
I do not mean to offend anyone and my apologies to the Polish, I grew up in the '60's with a mix of Russian, Czech, Hungarian, Pole parents, relatives and friends and this is mild to the s**... we dealt ourselves and friends back then. ;)
I heard that alcoholism is a big problem in the ghost community…
They are all really into boos
I just came up with this, this community can always use fresh/not reposted material.
I accidentally knocked over a headstone while walking through a cemetery.
I've made a grave mistake.
What do you get when you cross a lion with an octopus?
A stern rebuke from the scientific community and a immediate withdrawal of funding
I'm part of a local community group, and recently people have been asking for leftover moving boxes
Each time I want to say the boxes that hold still are more practical
A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents.
They're appalled by his haircut, tattoos and piercings.
The boy leaves and the girl's mom remarks, Dear, he doesn't seem to be a very nice boy.
* Oh, come on Mom! If he wasn't nice, would he be doing 300 hours of community service? *
I heard Microsoft tried to change the file path separator in Windows
but it received tons of backslash from the community.
--
Source: Aaron Peterson, Twitter.
Emergency measures
On behalf of the international community, as a humanitarian measure, we demand that President Putin be admitted to art school on an emergency basis.
I tried to join a local butter of the month club here in our small rural community, but for some reason, they rejected my application.
I'll tell you, I've never felt so margarin-lized in my life!
Not a joke but a thanks to this community
I'm so glad this sub exists, I crack these jokes all the time to my gf and she loves them. Thanks for all the creativity here!
The vampire hunters' association had a community outreach program
they had to appeal to stakeholders.
A teenage girl brings home her boyfriend to meet her parents
Her parents are disgusted by the boyfriend's crazy haircut, excessive tattoos and piercings.
After dinner, the girl's mom tells her, "Honey, he doesn't seem to be a nice boy. Are you sure about this?"
"Oh please mom." the girl begged. "If he wasn't a nice person why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?
