The Best 62 Communication Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Communication jokes. There are some communication navigation jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these communication systems puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Communication Jokes and Puns

I love in horror movies how the person yells out "

Hello?!" as if the killer is gonna say "Yeah I'm in the kitchen, want a sandwich?"

What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?

If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!

Wife asked her husband to give her the newspaper.



Husband: "How backward you are? Technology has developed so much and you are still asking for the newspaper... Take my iPad..."

Wife took the iPad and killed the Cockroach.

Husband faints.

Moral: Whatever the wife asks, give her without argument. Show your smartness in office, not at home.

Communication joke

A nursing assistant, a floor nurse and a charge nurse from a small nursing home were taking a lunch break in the break room.

In walks a lady dressed in silk scarves and wearing large polished-stone jewelry.
"I am Gina the Great," stated the lady. "I am so pleased with the way you have taken care of my aunt that I will now grant the next three wishes!"
With a wave of her hand and a puff of smoke, the room was filled with flowers, fruit and bottles of drink, proving that she did have the power to grant wishes before any of the nurses could think otherwise.
The nurses quickly argued among themselves as to which one would ask for the first wish.
Speaking up, the nursing assistant wished first. "I wish I were on a tropical island beach, with single, well-built men feeding me fruit and tending to my every need."
With a puff of smoke, the nursing assistant was gone.
The floor nurse went next. "I wish I were rich and retired, and spending my days in my own warm cabin at a ski resort with well-groomed men feeding me cocoa and doughnuts."
With a puff of smoke, she too was gone.
"Now, what is the last wish?" asked the lady.
The charge nurse said, "I want those two back on the floor at the end of the lunch break."

Judge: "You are sentenced to 2 years of solitary confinement"

Me: "Thank you."


Saying the same thing over and over again but expecting different results is called parenting.

Q: What do you call a smart blonde?

A: Bigfoot, because they don't exist.

Communication joke

Yo mama is so stupid when you asked her to grab McDonald's she brings the building home.

Got said, "Let there be light!"

Chuck Norris looked at him and said: "Say please."

Little Johnny walks into his parent's room one night to find them having sex.



"Mom? What are you doing?" he asks his mom.

"Making a cake" his mom replies.

Later that week, Little Johnny walks asks his mom in the car "Were you and daddy making a cake on the couch" he asks.

"Yeah. Why?" his mom asks, confused and worried.

"Because I licked the icing off the couch! It was delicious!" he responded.

They say sex is a killer...

Do you want to die happy?

You can explore communication transmission reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean communication environmental dad jokes. There are also communication puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Peter approaches the gates of Heaven.



"Knock knock," says Peter.

Miraculously, someone answers him.

"Who's there," a voice in the distance asked.

"God," says Peter.

"God who," asked the voice?

"GOD DAMMIT open these gates!

I've been a good neighbor, loved my wife and lost my virginity, twice!"

Please, keep talking. I always yawn when I am interested.

The biggest difference between men and women is what comes to mind when the word 'Facial' is used.

Before I criticize a man, I like to walk a mile in his shoes.

That way, when I do criticize him, I'm a mile away and I have his shoes.

I hate the part of the conversation where the other person says things.

Communication joke

Q: what did one lumber jack say to another lumber jack? A: "I need to axe you a question."

My name is John but you can call me tonight.

What is it? "It" is a pronoun.


A wise man once said... Nothing, he only listened.

What's your best non swearing insult? I hope you step on a lego.

I once meet an honest, caring, politician that listened when I spoke and tried to help the country.

Then I woke up.

Q: What did the full moon vampire say to the other full moon vampire?

A: See you next month!

Why shouldn't you tell an egg a joke? Because it might crack up!

What are a blonde's first words after graduating college? "

Would you like fries with that?"

Wife to husband: "I'm pregnant!"

Husband: "You're kidding me!"

If I tell you I'm thinking about you, don't get too excited, because I'm also thinking about nachos.

Fat Penguin. Excuse me?! I just wanted to say something that breaks the ice...

Every time you open your mouth, some idiot starts talking.

I had prepared for a battle of wits but I see you came unarmed.

Google is definitely a woman, it starts suggesting things before you can even finish your sentence.

What did the dog say when he rubbed sandpaper on his tail? Rough, rough!

Sorry I didn't respond to you just now. I was doing something productive and not wasting my precious time with your lowlife speeches.

Talking to women

A newlywed man was talking with an old war veteran about what to excpect in his upcoming marriage. After talking about several different topics the veteran turns to the newlywed and says the most complicated thing that you will come across in marriage is communication. Puzzled the newlywed askes why that is so. The veteran explains by saying that talking to a woman is a lot like walking in a minefield. You hope its clear but you never know when you are going to set her off.

Winds of 108mph, structural damage, flying debris, massive depression, icy blasts, communication difficulties, untold misery and suffering...

Yes, I forgot our anniversary again.

The three modes of communication

Telephone,
Telegraph and
Tell a woman

There have been so many recent terror attacks in the US

It *almost* makes you wish we had some kind of national agency that could monitor people's communication and act to stop things like this before they happen

"My first son has a PHD in arts, my daughter has two degrees in communication and jornalism and my youngest son is a burglar."

Friend: "Wow a burglar? You should kick him out!"

Dad: "Nah... he is the only one who makes money."

What are the three fastest forms of communication?

Telephone, telegraph, tell a woman.

The key to marriage is communication.

Don't have any, so you can't fight about what was said.

Have you seen Stephen Hawking's new communication device?

It really speaks for itself.

I told my wife that I think we have communication issues.

She hung up on me!

I got fired from work today..

My boss said my communication skills were awful.

I didn't know what to say to that.

I'm developing some flash cards to improve communication and understanding with my dog

Not much to speak of yet, I just have a handful of ruff sketches.

My supervisor said I'm getting a poor appraisal because my communication skills are so weak

I didn't know what to say to that

Sex with my wife is like the England World Cup squad

neither of us know why we're there or what we're doing, there's little passion or communication and we rarely even make it past the first stage.
It's often accompanied by lots of unnecessary noise, horrible dribbling and never a clean sheet.
It's always over far too quickly and when it does end we know it'll be at least another 4 years before it happens again.

Name the 3 fastest means of communication.

Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman

What are the three fastest means of communication?

1) Television

2) Telephone

3) Telawoman

After building the wall, Trump to build an electromagnetic barrier to prevent foreign bees from entering the U.S. by sending waves that interfere with their communication.

Trump is strictly against Global Swarming

Rob and Samantha ...

Rob and Samantha Henders just got married but they were having some communication issues – that's a nice way of saying they were fighting. One day, they were in the car driving down a country road, each not saying a word after a particularly intense fight.
As they passed a barnyard of mules and pigs, Rob sarcastically asked, "Are they relatives of yours?"
"Yes," Samantha replied. "I married into the family."

[Interview] Boss: I see you majored in communication.

Man: No. Miscommunication.

Boss: But your CV clearly says 'Communication'.

Man: See?

How do you communicate with a fish?

You drop it a line.

If you ever get locked out

Sit down and talk to the lock calmly,

Because communication is key.

A man was locked out of his apartment

He started talking calmly but firmly to the lock...
Because end of the day, communication is key.

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk to your lock calmly.

Because communication is key.

If you ever get locked out of your house,

talk to your lock calmly. Communication is key.

Stung...

A woman goes to the doctor looking fantastic: hair and makeup done by a professional, Gucci heels, Versace dress and Prada purse.

"I've been stung by a nasty insect of some kind," she tells the doctor, "...but I'm ashamed to tell you where."

"It's okay," says the doctor. "Our communication is privileged; I won't tell anyone."

"Okay," says the woman. "It was at Walmart."

What is Thor's favorite method of communication?

Norse code.

In 1862, Australia implemented a telegraph system that stretched from south Australia to Indonesia and beyond. Effectively becoming Australia's first internet.

And the speed of communication hasn't changed since.

Fedex

Fedex is like my ex, no communication, no respect for my stuff, it never seems to come and somehow it makes me think it's my fault.

My wife is always saying Communication is the most important thing in our relationship.

Then why do I have to spend all day figuring out why she is pissed?

Got home unannounced from college to find my parents had taken a vacation and not left the keys behind. Not a problem though, all I've got to do is talk to the door lock...

... because communication is key

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the communication electronics jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working communication device piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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