The Best 53 Committee Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Committee jokes. There are some committee congress jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these committee leadership puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Committee Jokes and Puns

Somalis at the Olympics...

The Somalian Olympic Committee issued an official apology earlier in the week, after realising that sailing and shooting are separate events.

TIL that curling used to be coed...

But the decision was made to segregate because the committee felt the female members had an unfair advantage, being naturally better sweepers.

What do you get when you cross a cat and a wild boar?

Revocation of your grant money and a stern rebuke from the ethics committee.

Committee joke, What do you get when you cross a cat and a wild boar?

When Canada became independent, a committee was made to name the new country.

The three men included disagreed on all names brought up so far. Finally, they all decided to just say one letter that they could use to add together to make a name they all agreed on.

The first guy said "C, eh?"

The second guys went "N, eh?"

The last guy goes "D, eh?"

And that's how we got the name Canada.

Latest news from the FIFA corruption scandal:

Shock announcement from FIFA's Ethics Committee:

"FIFA has an Ethics Committee"


FIFA Ethics Committee

The Democratic National Committee

Democratic. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Committee joke, The Democratic National Committee

A committee has narrowed the search for a name for the newly hypothesised 9th planet.

It's between Urpenis and Urvagina.

What do you get when you cross a cat and an octopus?

A strong reprimand from the ethics committee and immediate recission of all funding.

I tried donating to the itty-bitty titty committee...

But they don't really need the support

What do you get when you cross an octopus and a lion?

A stern rebuke from the ethics committee and an immediate withdrawal of funds.

You can explore committee chairman reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean committee unanimously dad jokes. There are also committee puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What do you get when you cross a cow and an octopus?

A reprimand from the Scientific Ethics and Integrity Committee and an immediate withdrawal of your grant funding.

The water quality is so poor in Brazil, the Olympic Committee decided to add a new event.

The Defecathlon.

The Somalian Olympics team has just apologised

The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologised to the Olympic Committee after realising that sailing and shooting were 2 separate events!!

A coworker just asked me if I was voted most likely to take a joke literally by my high school yearbook committee...

That wasn't even a real superlative. I swear, this guy...

An old soviet joke.

In a prison, two inmates are comparing notes. What did they arrest you for? asks the first. Was it a political or common crime? Of course it was political. I'm a plumber. They summoned me to the district Party committee to fix the sewage pipes. I looked and said, 'Hey, the entire system needs to be replaced.' So they gave me seven years.

Committee joke, An old soviet joke.

What do you get if you cross a woman with a whale?

Your research funding suspended and a severe reprimand from the ethics committee.

As soon as the inauguration is over, I'm getting a position on Trump's ethics committee.

I'm not political, I just need some quite time alone.

What do get if you cross a Kangaroo with an Elephant?

A stern letter from the scientific ethics committee.


What's a Camel?

A horse designed by committee.

What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo and an Elephant?

A letter from the Scientific Ethics Committee and a withdrawl of your grant money.

Rumor has it that Caitlyn Jenner recently called the Olympic committee to report sexual harassment.

Turns out she was getting fondled by a male track star for the last 50 years.

Why is Roy Moore's Strategic Planning Committee headquartered in Disney's Hollywood Hotel?

He likes to keep his staff in something 12 years old.

Putin: "Russia did not meddle in 2016."

International Olympic Committee: "You certainly won't in 2018."

A German, Frenchman, and Pakistani walk into a bar

"Jeez, we should lower the bar" the Olympic hurdle committee exclaimed.

High command asked a new recruit:

"What do you want to be in the army?"
"Pilot!"
And they sent him to preparatory courses, but they did not like him and told him he would never become a pilot.
So he went to the committee again.
"Where do you want to be in the army?"
"Air defence!"
"Why?"
"If I can't be a pilot, no one else can!"

My dad hanged himself recently. We decided to set up a committee in his honour.

However, we thought it would be inappropriate to have a chair.

The House Intelligence Committee

Shoot, I put the punchline in the title again!

What do you get when you cross a shark and a giraffe?

A stern reprimand from the bioethics committee.

What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

A sternly worded letter from the ethics committee and your funding revoked.

What do you get when you cross an elephant and an octopus?

A visit from the ehtics committee and immediate withdrawal of your funds.

What do you call a committee of emo kids?

A cutting board

What was the name of the political committee that worked to protect the rights of wine enthusiasts?

The Bacchus Caucus

Why did the horse get kicked off the committee?

He always voted "neigh".

What do you get when you cross a baby with an octopus?

An angry letter from the ethics committee and immediate cessation of all funding.

The Olympic committee wanted to name a celestial body after Oscar Pistorius.

But they were denied since he is already a shooting star.

I can't believe all of those women voted yes to pass Kavanaugh out of the Judiciary committee.

Well, I mean they voted no, but to Republicans that means yes.

Saudi Arabia is on the UN Human Rights Committee.

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

What do you call a group of forgetful congressmen?

An oversight committee

Foot Heads Arms Body

The army was deciding on how much weaponry should be provided to each unit and each soldier. For this, they set up a committee and the veteran General Samuel Foot was chosen to be the head of it.

The newspapers got wind of this and published it on the front page.
The headline was "Foot Heads Arms Body."

what do you get if you cross an octopus with a scorpion?

A freeze on your funding, and an immediate visit from the ethics committee.

My local neighbourhood committee leader lost his position recently

Needless to say he was dis-appointed

Horse committee is shutting down

Too many neighsayers.

What do you call a group of federal budget makers?

An add hock committee.

What do you call a group of Karens?

A committee

What do you get when you cross a hamster with a polar bear?

A loss of project funding and a stern telling off from the university ethics committee

What do you call a committee made up entirely of people named William?

A Billboard.

There were two men in a prison in the USSR.

One asked the other: Why are you here?
The other answers: Political reasons.

He asks another question: What political reasons?

The other prisoner answers: I am a plumber, and I got called in to the party committee to fix their sink. And they asked what was the problem and I said: "The whole system is rotten, everything must be replaced!"

What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee with a rhinoceros?

A meeting with the ethics committee and swift removal of your research funding.

What do you get when you cross a bat and a man?

A ban. Specifically, a lifetime ban from the genetics labs, as well as a visit from the ethics committee.

Committee, n.:

A group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be done. -- Fred Allen

I held a committee against horses but it failed to pass through.

All of them were Neigh-sayers.

What do you get if you cross a cow with an octopus?

An immediate cessation of funding and a stern rebuke from the ethics committee

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the committee liberties jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working committee board piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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