The Best 25 Comme Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Comme jokes. There are some comme toulouse jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these comme pez puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Comme Jokes and Puns

Comment found on an FB
pic of a new born baby

"Hey kid, Spoiler Alert: Life sucks."

I saw a commercial this afternoon advertising a "certified diabetic shoe fitter."

I really hope he remembers to take his insulin.

I commented on a ELI5 about occam's razor.

My answer wasn't long enough and was flagged by the moderator-bot.

Comme joke, I commented on a ELI5 about occam's razor.

Commercials that never made it to air

Here's my entry:

"Have you had an accident that wasn't your fault and has ruined your life? Next time, use Durex".

I saw a commercial for a fortune cookie maker...

And they say you can't make your own destiny.

While commemorating my father's various physical feats, one friend asked if he was "shredded".

He was cremated.


Each comment thread is a joke, but each user may only post one word.

You may only comment one word, or reply with one word to another comment. Good luck!

Comme joke, Each comment thread is a joke, but each user may only post one word.

Why are commercial flights always cheaper for vultures?

All their luggage is carrion.

To commemorate the disaster in Mecca where a crane fell and crushed pilgrims, Saudi Arabia will build a restaurant at the site.

An IHOP: International House of Pancakes.

A comment on police killing young black men.

Things would get better if everyone lightened up.

What's a commercial fisherman's favorite instrument?


You can explore comme fait reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean comme hace dad jokes. There are also comme puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Why do commercial fishermen use nets?

With only a rod you lose a fish in sea.

Whenever I see a commercial with a woman looking fully relaxed in a tub with 2 round slices of cucumber on her eyes ...

I wonder where the rest of the cucumber is.

The comments about Mitch McConnell looking like a turtle without a shell are particularly apt...

since he's clearly missing his spine.

I became a commercial pilot to overcome my greatest fear.

Dying alone.

One comment and...

I'll quit my job!

Comme joke, One comment and...

A Commercial Airliner Crashes Into The Ground and Flys Off Again.


I was going to comment on a post earlier about handicapped people but I didn't.

All the comments were disabled.

In the comments section.

This is apparently almost always the best joke, so I thought I'd post it for upvotes.

Commercial valu

Gets results with with e-lue beings

Treating ignores empty rughts

Did you see my comment about that deflated balloon?

It really blew up

As a commercial real estate agent, I especially enjoy showing of the shopping centers...

Cause once you've seen one, you've seen a Mall!

You know how TV commercials for burgers places make the burger look much better in the picture than they do in real life?

Yeah, that's Facebook

I just said "No comment" all the way through the police interview.

I didn't get the job.

Amazon's new commercial says working here is like working in the chocolate factory.

Cuz all these HIPAA violations, and unpaid workplace injuries.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the comme vous jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working comme bien piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes