Comma Jokes

Funniest Comma Short Jokes

Short comma jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The comma humour may include short semicolon jokes also.

1. What is the difference between a literalist and a kleptomaniac? A comma.
   A literalist takes everything literally. A kleptomaniac takes everything, literally.
2. Commas can change the meaning of a sentence. Example:
   I like to eat apples. ---> I like to eat commas.
3. What's the difference between a cheetah and a comma? A cheetah has claws at the end of its paws, and a comma is a pause at the end of a clause
4. A man has been found guilty of overusing commas The judge warned him to expect a very long sentence.
5. I came home to an intervention put on by my ex-lovers, my mom and my dad. And this is why we need the oxford comma.
6. My girlfriend said she hates being on her period. I told her it was better than being in a comma.
7. Saw a sign at a farm that said, "duck, eggs." I was contemplating the use of the comma when it hit me.
8. Punctuation Matters! I was walking past a farm and a sign said:
   "Duck, Eggs"
   I thought: That's an unnecessary comma - and then it hit me."
9. What's the difference between an ER doctor and an editor? One has patients with comas, the other has patience with commas.
10. Back in the day, excessive use of commas was considered a very serious crime. It usually resulted in a long sentence.

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Comma One Liners

Which comma one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with comma? I can suggest the ones about colon and comb.

1. If not using commas was a crime would it result in long sentences?
2. My three favourite things My 3 favourite things are eating my family and not using commas
3. Things I hate: lists, Oxford commas, and irony.
4. There are 3 things that I love: The Oxford Comma, irony, and missed opportunities.
5. I never learned proper grammar because of the accident. I was in a comma.
6. Jeff, a semicolon, and an Oxford Comma walk into a bar. They both had a great time.
7. If I had a puppy I'd name it comma. Why? Because of its small pause.
8. I love cooking dogs and children. But I hate using commas.
9. My 3 Fevorite Things are: Eating My Cats and Not Using Commas
10. Commas matter Let's listen to the doors.
    Vs.
    Let's listen to the commadoors
11. After years of saving, I finally have a comma in my bank account! $ -1,250
12. I hate recursion, irony, and the Oxford Comma.
13. Which punctuation mark gets the most rest? A comma
14. Commas can really change a sentence For example:
    John is in a hurry
    John is in a coma
15. Why did the period and and semicolon break up? Because they had nothing in comma

No Comma Jokes

Here is a list of funny no comma jokes and even better no comma puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• My friend was in a comma The doctor said "Do you mean coma?" and I replied "No, it's just a short rest."
• What do you call a lizard that can punctuate five times in a row? A comma comma comma comma comma chameleon!
• Did you hear about the poor chap who got smashed in the head by a grammar textbook? He remains in a comma.
• 28 consonants, 3 vowels, a question mark and 1 comma went to court They're awaiting their sentence
• What do you call it when a physician corrects your punctuation? A medically induced comma.
• What's the difference between a comma and a coma? One pauses your sentence, the other pauses your life.
• Learn the use of comma, save a wedding. Do your best man.
  Do your best, man.
• A comma is the difference between "Yesterday, I met the strippers, Donald Trump, and Hillary Clinton."
  and
  "Yesterday, I met the strippers, Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton."
• A lot of women actually turn into good drivers. So, watch out for turning women, good drivers. (Edited and improved with necessary comma added.)
• The Three Simple Things in This World That Give Me The Most Joy In This Life Are… Eating Puppies and Not Using Commas Appropriately.

Oxford Comma Jokes

Here is a list of funny oxford comma jokes and even better oxford comma puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Three Things I Enjoy... Subtle jokes, irony and the Oxford comma.
• An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television getting drunk and smoking cigars. A question mark walks into a bar?
• The inventor of the Oxford Comma has died. Tributes have been lead by JK Rowling, his wife and the Queen of England.
• My three favorite things are the oxford comma, irony, and missed opportunities.
• What three things would you bring if you were stranded on a deserted island? Irony, the oxford comma and a missed opportunity
• I didn't get accepted to Oxford. I got all of my commas from the University of Phoenix.

Comma Grammar Jokes

Here is a list of funny comma grammar jokes and even better comma grammar puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• s**... positions for grammar n**... There was once a book written in ancient India about s**... positions using punctuation marks.
  It was called the comma sutra.
• Did you hear that someone published a s**... guide for grammar n**...? It's called the Comma Sutra.

Share Hilarious Comma Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter

What funny jokes about comma you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean comp jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make comma pranks.