Comeback Jokes
100 comeback jokes and hilarious comeback puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about comeback that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Can't think of a good comeback? Look no further! This article has a list of the best comebacks for old jokes, bald jokes, name jokes, mean comebacks, and more. Whether you're trying to one-up your boyfriend or just looking for clever comebacks, you'll find what you need here.
Quick Jump To
- Short Comeback Jokes
- Comeback One Liners
- Comeback To Your Mom Jokes
- Comeback To Old Jokes
- More Comeback Jokes
Funniest Comeback Short Jokes
Short comeback jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The comeback humour may include short reunion jokes also.
- Why is spiderman so good at comebacks? Because with great power comes great response ability.
- I watched Into The Spiderverse and I wondered how Spider-Man always comes up with his witty comebacks. Then it it me with great power comes great response ability.
- So my wife said to me, "I swear, it's like all men share one brain" I wanted to think of a clever comeback, but it wasn't my turn to use the brain
- Why does spiderman always have the best comebacks? With great power comes great response ability!
- I love what you’ve done with your hair. How do you get it to come out of your nostrils like that?
- I see no evil, and I definitely don’t hear your evil.
- I know you are but what am I?
- Don’t worry, the first 40 years of childhood are always the hardest.
- Your face is just fine but we’ll have to put a bag over that personality.
- I’m not insulting you, I’m describing you.
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Comeback One Liners
Which comeback one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with comeback? I can suggest the ones about recovery and welcome back.
- Why is Jesus easy to insult? It takes him 3 days to comeback.
- What's a comeback that's twice as good as "no u"? No w
- Your face makes onions cry.
- You’re the reason God created the middle finger.
- I’m not a nerd, I’m just smarter than you.
- I heard reincarnation... ...is making a comeback.
- Oh my god! It speaks!
- Your secrets are always safe with me. I never even listen when you tell me them.
- I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
- They say invisible ink is making a comeback I can't see it happening
- When does a joke become a dad joke? When it goes out for milk and doesn't comeback.
- You have so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongue is in jail.
- Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
- You just might be why the middle finger was invented in the first place.
- You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel.
Comeback To Your Mom Jokes
Here is a list of funny comeback to your mom jokes and even better comeback to your mom puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Don't repeat what I insulted you with. If I wanted my comeback I'd wipe it off your moms face.
- Are you waiting for my comeback? You can scrape it off your mom's teeth
Comeback To Old Jokes
Here is a list of funny comeback to old jokes and even better comeback to old puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you say to old people in Australia as a comeback? ƃuɐɹǝɯooq 'ʞO
Quirky and Hilarious Comeback Jokes to Let the Chuckles Begin.
What funny jokes about comeback you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean revenge jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make comeback pranks.
What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
30 pounds. (and then the female come-back):
What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? 45 minutes!
Romney was asked about the Chinese going to the moon...
He responded that when they are up there, they will be able to see the flag we planted over 40 years ago. This is a pretty clever comeback. But the last laugh is on us. The US flags are now all beached white due to the unprotected exposure to the sun's UV radiation. This means the Chinese will think the French made it first.
Why doesn't Jesus participate in Battle Raps?
All his comebacks take three days..
Want to hear a good comeback story?
Brokeback Mountain.
Funny comeback from a student
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's
cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his
father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
comeback is real!
A professor and a fool
A professor was walking along a very narrow hall when he came face to face with a rival.
The passage way was too narrow for two to pass.
The rival, pulling himself up to his full height, said with a sneer,
I never make way for fools!
Smiling, the Gracious Professor stepped aside and with a bow replied, I Always Do.
I heard Plexiglass coffins are making a comeback, but...
Remains to be seen.
Comeback Joke
* nerds phone rings in class *
Cool Guy - awww, was that your mommy?
* whole class laughs *
Nerd Guy - nope, it was yours.
* whole class is silent *
Don't call it a comeback..
.. It's mostly in your hair.
"Sorry someone hacked my Facebook"
The best comeback when coming out fails.
Funny Comeback
Teacher: where is your homework?
Kid: at home.
Teacher: why is it at home?
Kid: it's called HOME work for a reason.
Teacher: are you being smart with me!
Kid: this IS school isn't it? Aren't you supposed to be smart.
I thought my witty comeback was completely original....
Turns out it was a riposte.
I'm investing all my money in boomerangs
I feel like they are going to be making a comeback
I heard Rick Astley was going to make a comeback.
I guess he never gave up.
My dad says I'm lazy.
I'll make a comeback soon.
My nephew was driving me crazy with his juvenile comebacks to everything I said, so I pushed him into the campfire.
Roasted!
What is slowly making a comeback?
The autistic child i just insulted.
Heads up!
I heard boomerangs are making a comeback.
Funny Comeback
I go into McDonald's and there is this fat girl making fun of this mentally disabled kid*
Me: you know, that could happen to any of us. You don't belong making fun of someone like that, what's wrong with you?
Girl: god gave me a mouth to speak and I'm going to use it
Me: well god also gave you a mouth to eat, you abused that privilege.
Girl: -speechless-
Me: oh and you might want to wipe that ketchup off your chin
Girl: *goes to wipe chin*
Me: no, your other chin
My wife insulted me saying I s**... at finishing stories.
That's when I hit her with the sickest burn / comeback of all time.
You’re a grey sprinkle on a rainbow cupcake.
If your brain was dynamite, there wouldn’t be enough to blow your hat off.
You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel.
Light travels faster than sound which is why you seemed bright until you spoke.
We were happily married for one month, but unfortunately, we’ve been married for 10 years.
I’ll never forget the first time we met. But I’ll keep trying.
I forgot the world revolves around you. My apologies, how silly of me.
I only take you everywhere I go just so I don’t have to kiss you goodbye.
Hold still. I’m trying to imagine you with personality.
Our kid must have gotten his brain from you! I still have mine.
The only way my husband would ever get hurt during an activity is if the TV exploded.
You look so pretty. Not at all g**..., today.
It’s impossible to underestimate you.
Her teeth were so bad she could eat an apple through a fence.
Keep rolling your eyes, you might eventually find a brain.
You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room.
Don’t worry about me. Worry about your eyebrows.
You are the human version of period cramps.
If you’re going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty.
You are like a cloud.
When you disappear it’s a beautiful day.
I’d rather treat my baby’s diaper rash than have lunch with you.
I may love to shop but I will never buy your bull.
You are so full of s**..., the toilet’s jealous.
Check your lipstick before you come for me.
It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack and said, I’ll take it!
Go back to Party City, where you belong!
Child, I’ve forgotten more than you ever knew.
Sister : You're Adopted.
Me : At least i was Wanted.
World's best comeback?
I walked across a bridge
And as I got to the other side I threw my boomerang, but it never came back. So as I was walking back across the bridge I was wonder, "why didn't it comeback" then all of the sudden
It hit me
I used to be in a band called boomerang
We're about to have a big comeback.
Reincarnation
Apparently reincarnation is making a comeback.
Reincarnation
Did you hear about reincarnation? I heard it's making a comeback.
Request, Best comeback and or witty response when you ask for a cup of water or something free at a restaurant/business and they reply jokingly back that'll be a thousand dollars.
I always just laugh, but there has to be something good to say back.
I've decided to invest in boomerangs
They're not too popular now, but I'm betting they'll make a comeback!
What's the difference between a magical girl's comedy sketch and a female dog's snappy comeback?
One's a witch's bit and the other is a b**...'s wit.
I can do anything better than you
Three Vampires trying to outdo one another. The first went away, come back with blood trickling out the side of his mouth. "I killed the whole family. The 2nd one went and comeback with even more blood. I killed the whole town. 3rd one goes away. Comes back, his whole body is saturated with blood. Wow look at you.
He goes, "You see those bunch of trees down there".
They go "Yes".
He goes "Well I f**... didn't".
