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Comcast Jokes

46 comcast jokes and hilarious comcast puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about comcast that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Comcast Short Jokes

Short comcast jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The comcast humour may include short download jokes also.

  1. How to win the war on drugs 1) legalize all drugs.
    2) require that all drugs be purchased through Comcast customer service.
  2. In the next Marvel movie I hear that Ironman, Captain America and the others will team up to battle Comcast . It is called Avengers Xfinity Wars!
  3. I've been a bad girl, she said, I need to be punished. So I signed her up for a Comcast account.
  4. Why are prisons banned from using Comcast Xfinity? Because then their cells would have no bars.
  5. My friend asked out a girl that works for Comcast "Do I need to schedule a date window? Like sometime between 1 and 3 or 6 to 9?"
    Made me laugh, thought you guys might enjoy it too
  6. Comcast opens an airline. The airplane only goes full speed to certain, partner airports and if the airplane flies further than expected, you're charged per mile.
  7. Prostitution is a more honest business than Comcast... ...Although they both get paid to screw people.
  8. Why is the founder of Comcast going to purgatory? He met St. Peter at the pearly gates and St. Peter said was, "Please hold. Your soul is very important to us."
  9. The average person spends about 6 months of their life waiting at a stop light, 25 years of their life sleeping... and 3 years of their life waiting on the phone with Comcast.
  10. The only time Comcast is fast is... when they're driving away from your house after an installation.

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Comcast One Liners

Which comcast one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with comcast? I can suggest the ones about upgrade and combine.

  1. What goes up, and never comes down? Your Comcast Bill.
  2. Today I got a good deal from Comcast.
  3. Comcast supports net neutrality
  4. What's the worst part about having Comcast internet? Loading...
  5. Comcast's Customer Service ba dum tsss
  6. The CEO of Comcast dies and goes to heaven...
  7. What was Hitlers only regret? Not working for Comcast.
  8. A message from Comcast... Thank you United Airlines!
  9. Why does everyone hate Comcast so much? ill let you know in a bit, I'm on hold
  10. Comcast took away my favorite channels I'm in tiers
  11. What do Comcast and and an M1 Garand have in common? Ping.
  12. Comcast Technical Support
  13. Why did North Korea lose Internet? Because they switched to Comcast.
  14. Unpopular opinion: I like Comcast
  15. Why do Native Americans wear feathers? So they don't get accused of working for Comcast

Comcast joke, Why do Native Americans wear feathers?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about comcast can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of comcast puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Amusing & Witty Comcast Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun

What funny jokes about comcast you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean ads jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make comcast prank.

What's a pirates least favorite letter?

Dear sir,
Your internet service has been disconnected due to terms of service violations and excessive downloading. Please return modem and accessories to your nearest Comcast location.
Sincerely,
Comcast

A man gets his Comcast bill through the mail.

He calls Comcast and complains that he has an eye problem. The operator asks "what does the eye problem have to do with paying your bill?" The man responds, " well, I don't see myself paying this bill."

Have you heard of the new s**... position called the "Comcast"?

You stay in for the entire day but nobody comes.

Dunno why people like to associate Comcast with the n**...

It's not like they're the fascist out there.

[OC] So a Comcast technician asks a woman on a date

Surprisingly, she says yes. He says "Great! Be at your house on Tuesday and I'll pick you up anywhere from 11am to 6pm." - Inspired by my recent internet installation experience.

Comcast's newest commercial really gave me a laugh.

They boasted their fast internet speeds, lower prices, and amazing customer service. Not to mention how they boasted supporting net neutrality.
Are there two companies named Comcast?

What's a pirates least favorite letter

Dear user,
your internet access has ben cut of due to i**... usage
yours truly
comcast

Why doesn't McDonald's sell snails, Home Depot sell software, or Comcast sell s**...?

McDonald's is a fast food restaurant.
Home Depot sells hardware.
Comcast doesn't charge extra to screw you.

I should get an award for the worst internet.

It wouldn't be special because of the other 300 million Americans who also have Comcast though.

Made a lot of friends on Valentines Day!

All of them girls! Strangely the phone numbers don't exist or connect to comcast.
New friends are fun!

What do Comcast and n**... have in common?

Comcast joke, What do Comcast and n**... have in common?

jokes about comcast

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these comcast jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.