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Comatose Jokes

10 comatose jokes and hilarious comatose puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about comatose that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Happy Comatose Jokes for a Lighthearted Night with Friends

What is a good comatose joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

I told my wife "if ever I become comatose and depend on a machine for my survival, unplug me"

She unplugged the computer.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A cannibal claims that he is turning into a vegetarian.

Now he only eats people in comatose.

Somebody told me to "live everyday like it's your last".

So, I decided I'd stay in bed with life support and act as if I'm in comatose state from now on.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

My wife came out of her coma and looked at me.

She said, "Your forearms don't look any bigger. You have been *m**...* while I was comatose, haven't you?"
"Yes," I replied.
She said, "Which hand did you use?"
I said, "Yours."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What do you call a comatose gay man?

A tomato...
It's both a fruit and a vegetable.

What is a children's television show centered on the imaginary adventures of comatose Christians be called?

Veggie Tales!
Veggie Tales!
Veggie Tales!

a peaceful man was so opposed to war that he upon reading his draft notice he passed out and remained comatose for the duration of the war

he was an unconscientious objector

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What does a comatose gay person and a tomato have in common?

First they were a fruit, now they're a vegetable.

What do you call a room full of comatose people?

A salad.

My feet are really hairy.

Every once in I while I go comatose.

Comatose joke, My feet are really hairy.

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Comatose joke, My feet are really hairy.

Comatose joke, My feet are really hairy.