Colon Jokes

Funniest Colon Short Jokes

Short colon jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The colon humour may include short column jokes also.

1. I dated an English teacher for a few months, but it didn't work out. She didn't approve of my improper use of the colon.
2. Adding a colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence For example:
   Jeffrey ate John's sandwich.
   Jeffrey ate John's colon.
3. A banana a day they said was good for cleaning the colon It was a week before I realised you have to eat them
4. Wife says "sorry I have my period". I said "that's ok honey, that's what the colon is for"!
5. A colon can really change the meaning of a sentence "The marbles fell out of my pocket."
   Vs
   "The marbles fell out of my colon."
6. a Colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence. Jane's friend took a bite of her hamburger.
   vs.
   Jane's friend took a bite of her colon.
7. We should send all of Earth's politicians to colonize Mars. All that hot air would make it habitible quickly!
8. A colon can dramatically change the meaning of a sentence. Example:
   I ate Julie's sandwich.
   I ate Julie's colon.
9. Doctor the operation was a success Patient really?
   Doctor yes, we have successfully removed the colon.
10. someone scolded me for using a semi colon instead of a colon... I just couldn't give a shift

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Colon One Liners

Which colon one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with colon? I can suggest the ones about comma and clause.

1. Doctor: sorry but I had to remove your colon in the surgery.. Me why?
2. Space colonization I: :think: :I: :may: :have: :figured: :it: :out
3. Colon Cologne, the fragrance that takes you beyond Uranus!
4. I can't wait until we colonize space And then it's two worlds one cup.
5. I: went::: to:: the: doctor's:::: today:: I:: have::: colon: cancer::
6. What do you call a doctor that works with Colons? An English professor.
7. If you survive colon cancer Are you only left with a semi colon?
8. The Three Protocols of Sodomination 1. Analyze
   2. Colonize
   3. Rectify
9. If there's one thing my English major girlfriend has taught me, It's what a colon does.
10. Rich people have... Rich people have colon cleanses
    Poor people have taco bell
11. Why haven't white people colonized Mars? There's no one to take it from.
12. I was a surgeon with bad punctuation I got fired for leaving out a colon
13. Sometimes I feel like a semi-colon I don't know where I belong ;
14. What's the best way to end an argument? A semi-colon.
15. What kind of punctuation do you use in a half-assed sentence? A semi-colon.

Colon Removal Jokes

Here is a list of funny colon removal jokes and even better colon removal puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• My English professor had a colonoscopy... Turns out he had colon cancer so he had to have surgery to remove the tumor. Now he has a semi-colon.
• Turns out I have colon cancer. I'm getting part of it removed tomorrow. All I'll have left is a ;
• A programmer had surgery for a stomach problem, and half of his intestines had to be removed. He could never write code after that. He was always missing a semi-colon.
• I had to have 75 percent of my colon removed The only thing I have left is a ;

Colon Cancer Jokes

Here is a list of funny colon cancer jokes and even better colon cancer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Why does a semi colon have that little growth on the bottom? It has colon cancer.
• Daddy, daddy, I have colon cancer. Don't worry, mom only has her P.
• What do you get when you mix a middle aged man with colon cancer? ;

Colon Surgery Jokes

Here is a list of funny colon surgery jokes and even better colon surgery puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• The Pope recently had Colon Surgery. Imagine having to operate on such an important person... The surgeon probably poped himself
• What happened to the Professional Writer who had bowel surgery? He ended up with a semi-colon.

Cheerful Fun Colon Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy

What funny jokes about colon you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean compass jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make colon pranks.