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Colombian Jokes

21 colombian jokes and hilarious colombian puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about colombian that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Colombian Short Jokes

Short colombian jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The colombian humour may include short addictive jokes also.

  1. Mom, I am very worried... Mom, I am very worried, I have lost 3 kg.
    - But that are great news, You should be very happy.
    Yeah, Say it to my Colombian *friends*
  2. So did you hear that the Colombians voted in a referendum to continue their war? I was like FARC me . . . .
  3. I like my women how I like my coffee. The largest size I can get and preferably Colombian.
    I thought I would post the joke with my punchline instead of plugging it every time this joke is used.
  4. As Colombian authorities chased down drug kingpin Pablo Escobar, his last words before they shot him were: "I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you Medellín kids"
  5. My boss asked me to take a drug test I told him I've already tried most, but I'm always up for some pure Colombian.
  6. Colombian Necktie Did the man with the Colombian necktie like his necktie?
    He couldn't say.

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Colombian One Liners

Which colombian one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with colombian? I can suggest the ones about imported and .

  1. What do they call a talkative Colombian? Hablo Escobar
  2. I lost 5 pounds. That's good for your health! The colombians disagree.
  3. I like my women like I like my coffee... ... Colombian ;)
  4. What do you call a Colombian coffee farmer? A grounds keeper.
  5. What do you call an egyptian sun god with a colombian accent? ShakiRA
  6. Which color do Colombian communists hate the most? *Greengos*
  7. What did the Colombian man say to a girl he had s**... with? I *Medellín* your pants
Colombian joke, What did the Colombian man say to a girl he had s**... with?

Humorous Colombian Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life

What funny jokes about colombian you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make colombian pranks.

"Oh man, Juan Valdez died this morning."

Ok, so it's not a 'joke' joke, but that's what you say. Maybe at work, at the bar with friends. Say it in a lull in the conversation. If you're really good, say it while scanning the paper or a news site.
Some people go, "oh!" And some people say, "wait, the Colombian coffee merchant?" and some people say, "oh my god, he *did?*" People always say something.
And then *you* say, "he did, he was assassinated. Someone from a drug cartel shot him with a golf gun. Bizarre story."
And you leave it there.
And if someone presses further, perhaps mention how terrible it must be to get shot by a golf gun.
And you'll eventually be asked, "what's a golf gun?"
To which you say, "don't know, but it sure made a hole in Juan!"

- Mom, I've lost 2 kilograms and now I'm so worried that I cannot even sleep…

\- Mom, I've lost 2 kilograms and now I'm so worried that I cannot even sleep…
\- Son, don't panic, it's only 2 kilograms, no big deal.
\- Well, there are some Colombians who'd disagree with you mom…

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman... (long joke)

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a Hawaiian and an Alaskan), an Argentinean, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovak, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, an Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uruguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, an Iranian, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Syrian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, an Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a v**... Islander, a Georgian, a Bahaman, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Canadian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Ghanaian, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian, 2 Africans and you...
walk into a fine restaurant.
"I'm sorry," says the maître d', after scrutinizing the group, "but you can't come in here without a Thai."

They walk in the bar

A bartender is working at an upscale bar downtown when all of the sudden, an Englishman, a Dane, a Frenchman, a German, a Russian, an American, a Canadian, a Mexican, a Peruvian, a Brazilian, a Colombian, a Chinese, a Japanese, a Korean, 29 different Africans from all different African countries, and an Indian all walk in to the bar.
And the bartender says to them, sorry gentlemen, but you can't come here without a Thai.
^thanks ^SnW

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

I once knew a Colombian conductor.

He was arrested for the m**... of a passenger and in his confession he said he did it because the passenger was wearing pink shoes. I never would have thought that he was capable of something like this, but I must admit he had a locomotive.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What did the Colombian druglord say after being caught by the local youngsters?

And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you Medellín kids.

Colombian joke, My boss asked me to take a drug test