Collie Dog Jokes

36 collie dog jokes and hilarious collie dog puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about collie dog that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Collie Dog Short Jokes

Short collie dog jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The collie dog humour may include short collie jokes also.

  1. I've finally taught my dog to fetch a glass of red wine. He's a Bordeaux Collie

    And yes, he paws it himself...
  2. What do you get when you cross a border collie with a pit bull? A dog that is smart enough to bury the bodies.
  3. What do you call a sad dog ? A Melan-Collie.
    What do you call a sadder dog ?
    A Chi-Waah-Waah.
  4. My dog got a cantaloupe stuck on his head Ever since then he's been a little melon collie.
  5. I'm not sure how to feel about this... but I was sold a herding dog for my cantaloupe patch. He's a little melon-collie.
  6. What kind of dogs will patrol the Trump wall? Border Collies!
    I just came up with this after not sleeping for 30+ hours. Sorry for the cheesy goodness.
  7. If dogs were plants, what would they be? Collie-flowers
    I'm gonna go shoot myself in the head now
  8. My dog is sad after eating her favorite fruit and getting wet from the juice. She's a watered melancholy watermelon collie.
  9. A lot of people didn't know that Mozart's dog started to turn into a piece of fruit. He composed a piece about it. It was a melon-collie tune....
  10. A talented artist sculpts a dog out of melons. After it looks perfect, he takes a picture of it, then starts eating it. He is suddenly very sad.

    He was full of *melon-collie*.

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Collie Dog One Liners

Which collie dog one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with collie dog? I can suggest the ones about border collie and hound dog.

  1. What's half fruit, half dog and is rather sad? A Melon Collie.
    ...I'll get my coat.
  2. What do you call a sad dog that likes to eat fruit? A melon-collie.
  3. I love my dog, but he's very unpredictable. He's a borderline collie.
  4. What do you get when you cross a sad dog and a fruit salad? A Mellon Collie
  5. What's Donald Trump's favorite dog breed? A close-the-border collie.
  6. What kind of dog did the sad cantaloupe get? A melon collie!
  7. What do you call a sad dog? A melan-collie
  8. Why was the dog that looked like a canteloupe sad? She was a Melon-Collie
  9. I've trained my dog to bring me red wine.
    It's a Bordeaux collie.
  10. Border collies are not very i**...... You know what dogs *are* i**...?

Collie Dog Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about collie dog you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cat dog jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make collie dog pranks.


At the end of the day, a border collie reported back to the grazier, "All fifty sheep accounted for, boss!"
"Wait, I only have 48 sheep!" he replied.
"I know," said the dog, "but I rounded them up."

A farmer wanted to know how many sheep he had...

So he asked his border collie to count them from him.
The dog ran off counted the sheep and ran back to the farmer.
"So how many sheep do I have?" Asked the farmer.
"40" said the border collie.
"How can there be 40?" Asked the farmer. "I only bought 38."
The dog replies, "I rounded them up."

A guy walks into a bar

A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of red wine. The bartender's therapy dog leaps to his feet, races across the room, runs down the stairs to the wine cellar and within moments returns with a lovely bottle of cabernet savignon in his jaws which he drops gently at the bartender's feet. "Wow, that dog is amazing," the guy says. "What kind is it?" "Oh, he's nothing special," the bartender replies. "Just a bordeaux collie."

A farmer wants to know...

A farmer wants to know how many sheep he has in his field, so he asks his border collie to count them. The dog runs into the field, counts them and runs back to the farmer. The farmer says, "How many?" The dog says, "40." The farmer is surprised and says, "How can there be 40 - I only bought 38!" The dog says, "I rounded them up."

My neighbor has a 15 acre farm, he breeds dogs to do work on them. He grows cantaloupe, and come harvest time the dogs sniff out the ripe ones and bring them back to the barn.

He says the breed are Melon Collies

Two dogs and a cat appeared in heaven

Two dogs and a cat appeared in heaven and were seeking admission. God Himself decided to hear their appeal from His judgement seat.
The St Bernard said "I was a valued rescue dog and helped find those nuns after the avalanche."
"Fine then, you're in," said God.
The collie said, "I was always faithful to my master and brought the family together when they were down."
"Sounds wonderful," said God. "Welcome."
Then it was the cat's turn. "Why should we let you in?" asked God.
"Well actually, I think you're in my chair."