The Best 40 Cola Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Cola jokes. There are some cola heineken jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these cola fanta puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Cola Jokes and Puns

Sex with my wife has depreciated like Coca Cola

"Cocaine", "Caffeine", "Light" and now "Zero"

Yeah I got a job at Coca Cola...

It's sodapressing.

Russians Hate Coca Cola

A Russian walks into a store and demands,

-- "Give me a bottle of vodka and a bottle of Coca Cola."

After half an hour, the Russian returns and demands again,

-- "Give me a bottle of vodka and a bottle of Coca Cola."

After one hour, he comes back for a third time and says to the shopkeeper,

-- "Give me a bottle of vodka and a bottle of ... Sprite. It seems Coca Cola makes me sick!"

Cola joke, Russians Hate Coca Cola

Recycler's remorse

Crushing coca cola cans is soda pressing.

How do you stir the politics in a Coca Cola drink?

You add ices.

A local grocery bagger has been bagging cola on top of bread.

Many were concerned that their bread would be flattened. His response to their concerns was "It's fine. They're soft drinks"

What's the difference between domestic violence and Coca Cola?

You can feel the beating, but you can't beat the feeling.

Cola joke, What's the difference between domestic violence and Coca Cola?

Just got a new Job at Coka Kola

Engineering job, and man there is lots of high tech cola industry jargon being tossed around there, soda speak.

A guy was talking to a girl....

Guy: Hey Babe, are you a Coca Cola?

Girl: No, why do you ask?

Guy: Because you Open Happiness

(credit to my friend who successfully used this as a pick up line)

Pepsi had a new idea about how to package their cola

But then they canned it.

What work did the Italian immigrant to West Virginia want to do?

Be a cola miner.

You can explore cola snapple reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean cola pepsi dad jokes. There are also cola puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Why did the colander take a day off?

It was feeling strained.

Whats a frogs favourite drink?

Croaka Cola.

You can use a colander to look at the eclipse

But be careful you don't strain your eyes


Hard to rinse out.

A woman who drank 10 litres of Coca Cola every day has died.

She ate a Mentos and they found her head 3 blocks away

Cola joke, A woman who drank 10 litres of Coca Cola every day has died.

I just saw a video of someone crushing a 6 pack of Coke in a hydraulic press. All that wasted cola made me so sad.

It was soda-pressing

What is a Romulan's favorite soft drink?

Cloak 'a cola.

What would America do if Russia painted the moon red?

Paint Coca Cola over it in white.

I just bought some Coca Cola stocks.

It's nice to have some liquid assets.

A bear walks into a bar and says, "give me a whiskey and.... cola."

"Why the big pause?" asks the bartender. The bear then answered. "I'm not sure, I was born with them."

People never ask how Coca Cola is feeling

They only ask if Pepsi is okay

What's a pirate's favorite drink?

Arrr, sea cola.

It is my first time in court and I heard the judge shouting, "Order!!"

So I replied fried chicken, mac and cheese and cola. Now I'm being escorted out by two officers. I think we are going to a restaurant.

What do you get when you put Cola in an oven?

Baking soda

A horse walks into a bar and orders cola

The bartender: "with a straw?"
Horse: "a lot of straw"


Catch her by her waist

Bring her home

Keep ur hand on her neck

Put ur lips on her lips

& have a

Nice Drink

There's one good thing about being hit in the head with a bottle of Coca Cola

It's a soft drink

How does a pyromaniac react when they get flammable Coco cola for Christmas?

He's soda lighted!

A bear walks into a bar

Bear: Give me a whiskey ... and cola.

Bartender: Why the big pause?

Bear: I was born with them.

Soylent Cola, the soda made from grinding up people, is said to not have a set flavor

They say the taste varies from person to person.

Coca Cola employees can't dance...

But they can Tango.

I like American cola just fine, and Mexican cokes are even better!

But Columbian coke is especially great!

Please stop making new flavors of coca cola.

Either you put the cocaine back or leave it alone.

A bear walks into a bar and says "Give me a whiskey...... and a cola

The bartender says "why the big pause"
The bear said " I'm not sure i was born with them."

If you like Piรฑa Coladas and getting caught in the rain...

getting drunk in the shower would save a lot of time.

A long time worker at a coca cola just lost his job

He is soda pressed now.

You know where they make those little cola cans?

Out in Minisoda

A funny joke

A bear walks into a bar and says, Give me a whiskey and โ€ฆ cola.

Why the big pause? asks the bartender. The bear shrugged. I'm not sure; I was born with them.

The bear in the bar

A bear walks into a bar and says, "Give me a whiskey and ...... cola."

"Why the big pause?" asks the bartender.

The bear shrugged. "Iยดm not sure; I was born with them"

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the cola fizzy jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working cola daiquiri piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes