Cockeyed Jokes

Following is our collection of complication puns and graft one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Cockeyed jokes for adults, dirty tonsillectomy jokes and clean reconstruction dad gags for kids.

The Best Cockeyed Puns

I woman had just given birth to a baby boy...

The doctor was holding him and told the parent,"I regret to inform you that your son was born without eyelids." The mother replies," That's terrible. What are we going to do?" The doctor says," I've seen this before, don't worry. We will circumcise him and use the foreskin to make him new eyelids." The father says," Won't that make him cock-eyed." The doctor replies," No, if anything it will give him foresight"

There was a kid that was born with no eyelids.

The doctor was able to use the skin from the circumcision to make him new eyelids.
It went really well other than the fact the kid is a little cock-eyed

Doctor: So your child was born without eyelids.

Mother: Well isn't there anything you can do?

Doctor: Yes, when we circumcise him we can take that excess skin and make him eye lids.

Mother: Will he be okay?

Doctor: Yeah, he will be fine, just be a little cock-eyed.

Cockeyed joke, Doctor: So your child was born without eyelids.

A jewish woman goes to the hospital to give birth to her son.

Unfortunately the baby boy is born without eyelids.

The jewish woman is hysterical and says: Doctor, doctor what am i going to do? My baby boy has no eyelids!

The doctor calmly replies: Missus Levine, don't worry your son is going to be circumcised so we can do a transplant and give him eyelids.

Missus Levine says: Doctor, doctor but I don't want a son that's gonna be cockeyed!

Doctor replies: But Missus Levine imagine what foresight he'll have!

A baby boy was born last week with no eyelids.

They used his foreskin to graft eyelids.

The poor kid is now cockeyed.


(AP) New York - A baby delivered without eyelids had surgery today at Mount Sinai Hospital in Manhattan, NY. Doctors successfully removed the child's foreskin and were able to use the tissue to successfully form eyelids. Doctors said the child will be fine.

Just a little cockeyed.

A young burn victim gets new eyelids made from his foreskin!

Doctors say he will be a little cockeyed.

Cockeyed joke, A young burn victim gets new eyelids made from his foreskin!

A baby boy was born without eyelids. After the circumcision, the doctors used the foreskin to make eyelids.

Now he's cockeyed.

Did you hear about the kid born w/o an eyelid?

When they circumcised him, they used the extra skin to fix his eyelid.

The procedure went fine, he's a little cockeyed now though...

Born without eyelids.

Last week a little boy was born at the hospital without any eyelids. Puzzled the doctors didn't know what to make of it. In a snap of genius, when they circumcised the boy they also replaced his missing eyelids. Only problem is now he's cock-eyed.

A baby was born with no eyes lids...

So the doctors decided to circumcise him and use the skin to craft new eyes lids.

They botched it though and he came out looking a bit cock-eyed.


I knew a kid in grade school who was born with deformed eyelids...

...So they took the flesh from his circumcision to fix his deformity. For the rest of his life he was cock-eyed.

A boy is born without eyelids...

A boy who was born without eyelids is making national headlines as he has just undergone experimental surgery to use his foreskin to craft new eyelids. The surgery was a success and the boy is recovering perfectly. However, he will be a little cockeyed.

An uncircumcised friend of mine had to have plastic surgery on his eyelids after a severe burn to his face and the doctor used his foreskin for the graft...

The doctor was able to save his sight but now he is a little cockeyed.

Burn unit

I asked the doctor what they did with all the foreskins after circumcisions, he told me that years ago they would send them to the burn unit for people with facial burns for eyelid reconstruction. I asked, why did they stop? He says, because ask the patients ended up looking cockeyed

Did you hear about the baby born with no eyelids?

They used his foreskin for an eyelid skin graft.

.

.

.

.

.

***Now the poor guy is cock-eyed***

Cockeyed joke, Did you hear about the baby born with no eyelids?

Needed: Eyelids

A baby is born with no eyelids. The doctors need a solution, and fast. The best solution, and the one they arrive at, is to use his foreskin for his new eyelids. They successfully attach his foreskin as eyelids, with only one complication. Now hes a little cock-eyed.

Did you hear about that baby boy that was born with no eyelids?

The doctors actually used his foreskin from circumcision to construct his eyelids. He's OK, but just a little cock-eyed.

A child was born with no eyelids, so doctors created some using his foreskin

It worked okay, but he was a little cockeyed


A kid was born without eye lids, so they used the spare skin from his circumcision to form some. Everything turned out fine, except...

the doctor said he was a little cockeyed.

My newborn son...

was born with no eyelids. Luckily, the doctor was able to use the foreskin (after they circumcised him) to make eyelids for him. They say he's gonna be ok...he'll just be a little cockeyed.

Poor kid

Was reading the news this morning and saw an article about a kid in Denver born without any eye lids.

The doctor decided that since the parents were having him circumcised, the foreskin could be made into eye lids for the kid.

The surgery actually turned out really well, kids just a little cockeyed.

So a man had his eye lids burned off in a fire and the doctors used a new procedure to replace them with his foreskin

He came out just fine besides being a little cockeyed.

You hear the one about the kid who was born with no eyelids?

The doctor was able to make new ones for him with the kid's foreskin. When the parents asked if he'll be fine, the doctor replied, "Oh he'll be fine, he'll just be a little cock-eyed."

Did you hear about the baby boy born without eyelids?

Fortunately, doctors were able to use his foreskin to create functional eyelids. While an overall success, the surgery did leave him a little cock-eyed.

My cock-eyed professor had a really bad day today.

His pupils got way out of line.

It made him so angry that he couldn't see straight.

Did anyone else hear about the baby who was born recently, without eyelids? The doctors actually used his foreskin to make a pair of lids for him.

It was an experimental procedure, and it worked great!.... except now he's all cock-eyed.

There was a boy born without eye lids last week!

Doctors were able to make him eye lids out of the foreskin from his circumcision.

They think he will be alright, but he is going to be a little cock-eyed.

Did you hear about the boy born without eyelids?

The doctors said they could give the boy eyelids made out of his foreskin. The only problem is that he would be a little cockeyed.

When I was circumcised they accidentally took a little extra off.

They ended up using it as skin grafts for a pair of twin's eyelids.

Now I'm getting sued by the parents because they're a little cock-eyed.

Did you hear about the baby that was born without eyelids?

Luckily the doctors were able to graft him a new pair from his foreskin. The operation was a success, however now the baby's a little cockeyed.

My friend had to go to the doctor, because all he could see were dicks.

Turns out he was cock-eyed.

My son was born without eye lids

My son was born with out eye lids, so when they circumcised him they used his foreskin as new eye lids.
He's alright now, just a little cock-eyed

A little boy was born with no eyelids..

A little boy was born with no eyelids. The doctor said when we circumcise him we can take some of that skin and make him new ones. As the boy grew up he was able to see just fine, other than being a little cock-eyed!

A baby was born this morning with no eyelids.

So the doctors used the baby boy's foreskin to create functional eyelids.

Doctors say the baby is doing fine, all vitals look good, but he's a little cock-eyed.

I was born without eyelids, so they created them from my foreskin...

Now I'm a little cock-eyed.

My dad has a lazy eye and tells this joke when someone asks about it.

There was a baby boy born at the hospital without eyelids.

So the doctors circumcised him and used his foreskin as eyelids. He's doing fine, he is just a little cockeyed

A Florida boy was born with no eyelids...

The doctors decided to make him some eyelids using his foreskin.

He's a little cock-eyed now, but he'll be fine.

A man goes to the doctors to get his first son circumcised...

A man goes to the doctors to get his first son circumcised. He meets with a pediatrician who says "ya know we used to use the foreskin from the circumcision to do skin transplants for kids born without eyelids... But we had to stop because they started coming out cockeyed"

A baby boy was born without eyelids.

The doctors decided to circumcise him and use the foreskin to create eyelids for him. It all went well except he is a little cockeyed.

Did you hear about that kid who was born with no eyelids?

They made him new eyelids from his circumcision. He's fine, just a little cockeyed.

My son was born without eyelids...

The Dr suggested a new procedure using his foreskin after circumcision to replace his missing lids. The only possible complication was that he would be a little cock-eyed.

I was born with a missing eyelid. The doctors used my foreskin to replace it.

Which is why to this day I see the world a little cockeyed.

I had to have foreskin removed when I was thirteen

My sister was born with no eyelids and the doctor suggested making them out of foreskin.
Worked awesome, she can blink and wink normally. Only thing is that she is a bit cockeyed...

Did you hear about that baby that was born without one of his eye-lids? they used part of his foreskin to replace it.

He'll be alright, just a little cock-eyed.

[NSFW] A baby was born with no eye lids. .

So they used the skin from his circumcision to make them.

They said he'll be alright, just a little cockeyed.

Did you hear about the kid born without eyelids?

Doctors were doing a circumcision anyways and used the foreskin for new eyelids.

Don't worry, he's fine. He's just little cockeyed now.

Did you guys hear about the baby that was born without eyelids?

He's a boy, and the were gonna circumcise him anyway, so the surgeon used the foreskin to make new eyelids.

Don't worry, the baby's doing great. He's just a little cockeyed.

A baby boy was recently born without eyelids...

The doctors, thinking quickly, circumcised the boy and fashioned eyelids from the boy's foreskin. Reports are that the surgery was successful although the boy is now cock-eyed.

*Nsfw* Went to school with a kid who had no eyelids.

They used his foreskin to make eyelids.
He could see fine, he was just a little cockeyed.

^I'll ^see ^myself ^out.

There is an abundance of uncircumcised jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 50 funniest jokes and cockeyed puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any sideways witze you can hear about cockeyed.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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