Following is our collection of Cocaine jokes which are very funny. There are some cocaine narcotics jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these cocaine colombia puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
I would not have to sell cocaine anymore.
"Cocaine", "Caffeine", "Light" and now "Zero"
It only has one line.
I just like the smell.
Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.
Too soon?
I just love the way it smells.
And certainly whenever I make love it involves the death of an orphaned Columbian street child.
- Credit to Frankie Boyle
Unless it's dissolved in water.
Police Let It Go With A Warning
enough to kill 2 1/2 men.
a buttload.
You can explore cocaine quackhead reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean cocaine crackhead dad jokes. There are also cocaine puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
I think it's because he was caught with a bag of cocaine. But regardless, our boss told us to keep our noses out of it.
always sticking their business in other people's noses.
Eric Clapton wouldn't drop a bag of cocaine out the window
So I bought a 100 ft straw.
A punchline
Cocaine
It's not all it's cracked up to be.
Right under the children's noses
I can't remember all of it, but the last line's a killer.
"10 kilograms you say?"
"Yeah, 5 kilograms"
I said, "Who is it?" and they told me that it was the police. I asked them what they wanted and they said that they wanted to investigate my property for marijuana.
I said, "I haven't got any. Now be on your way."
"Well then," they said, "what harm is there in us checking?"
I said, "Because you might find the cocaine."
It's not all it's cracked up to be.
Snort stories
White powder!
White, chopped into a fine powder, and flushed down the toilet once the police realize what I did and bang on my door.
... with none of the teeth!
- Do you drink?
- Never, only water.
- You smoke?
- Oh no, my body is a temple
- Do you have crazy nights out dancing while doing cocaine and coming back home to have unprotected sex with multiple partners?
- Never, I'm single and abstinent.
- I see. So could you explain me exactly why you want to live old?
"Excuse me, I just need the toilet," I said, excusing myself from the table.
"Don't forget to spray the air freshener!" joked the dad.
I said, "No need. Cocaine doesn't smell."
"White Powder!"
So the other day I went to the doctors for an annual checkup, before we started he asked "have you been doing any drugs?", I replied with "does love count as a drug?", he said "love is the strongest drug out there!", I then said "that's good cause I'm in love with cocaine!".
Apparently cocaine isn't a valid answer.
Crackalackin
Eric Clapton wouldn't let a pound of coke fall out of a window
Enough to kill two and a half men.
One of the teachers at my local school for obese children, was fired today. He was fired for doing cocaine before going to work. He was ratted out by his large pupils.
I call it Kurt Cocaine.
I've been doing it for 5 years i would know
1st Student: I go and buy weed from Yakobo
2nd Student: I always go and buy cigarettes from Yakobo.
3rd Student: I go and buy cocaine from Yakobo.
4th Student: I always stay at home and do my homework.
Teacher: You are a great student, I hereby appoint you as the class monitor. You are a good example to other students. What's your name?
4th Student: Yakobo
I think it's Colombia's mission to keep the world awake.
But apparently that's not how you're supposed to do cocaine.
*Teacher*: What do you do after school?
*1st Student*: I go and buy weed from Yakobo
*2nd Student*: I always go and buy cigarettes from Yakobo.
*3rd Student*: I go and buy cocaine from Yakobo.
*4th Student*: I always stay at home and do my homework.
*Teacher:* You are a great student, I hereby appoint you as the class monitor. You are a good example to other students. What's your name?
*4th Student*: Yakobo
*Teacher*: Satan!
Because he was giving out free cocaine
Cocaine
The lines were ridiculous.
Buttcrack
Pretty odd place to do cocaine if you ask me.
Odie.
A trunkfull.
Me: I had a bagel for breakfast that morning
Doctor: You also tested positive for marijuana, alcohol, cocaine, methamphetamine and just about every other drug
Me:...It was an everything bagel
"Can I speak to the Cocaine Councillor please" I asked. "You'll have to wait" he replied,"he's on another line."
He was addicted to quack cocaine
(I honestly wish I could take credit for this)
...that he was a barber.
It was the end of the line for him.
...it's actually cheaper to buy cocaine and run everywhere instead
...and you've tested positive for opiates...
Patient: I ate a bagel this morning.
Doctor: ...and meth, cocaine, marijuana, oh and you're pregnant.
Patient: it was an everything bagel.
....on cocaine. From now on i'm going to watch all documentaries this way.
Anthony says "I buy weed from Yakobo"
Emily says "I buy booze from Yakobo"
Shaun says "I buy cocaine from Yakobo"
The teacher definitely didn't want to hear this type of responses, so she asks another random kid whom she didn't know that well.
"I complete my homework" he says.
Pleased, the teacher says "very good! What's your name, child?"
"I'm Yakobo"
And one day one of the secretaries asked me to get Kofi Annan a gram of cocaine.
Of course, I called him immediately.
"Kofi" I said, "right now the only one I can think of is 'oceanic'"
But then they asked about the THC, meth amphetamines, cocaine, and hallucinogens. Told them it was an everything bagel.
but it smells amazing!
You over Doce
"Sure," I said. "It's blue and there's bits of cocaine on it."
After the first few lines I was hooked.
then the Americans will be the ones climbing the wall...
Because calling themselves Cocaine Lines was too on the nose.
But cocaine is where I draw the line.
The first line is quite big, but then the lines get smaller and smaller and smaller...
I'm really upset—-I had it all lined up.
Eric Clapton would never let a bag of coke fall out of a window
Surprisingly hard when you're carrying 25 pounds of cocaine.
I can't find my cocaine.
He finally stopped at the Finnish line.
But cocaine is where I draw the line.
Wise crack.
Teacher : "What do you do after school?"
Student #1 : "I always go buy cigarettes from Yakobo"
Student #2 : "I go to buy weed from Yakobo"
Student #3 : "I go to buy cocaine from Yakobo"
Student #4 : "I always stay at home and do my homework"
Teacher : \*points at Student #4\* "You are a great student. I hereby appoint you as the class monitor. You are a good example to the other students. What is your name?"
Student #4 : "Yakobo"
Quack cocaine
My agent called and I have a part in a movie called Cocaine
I was a little disappointed, I only have 1 line
..once for 2 years, and once for 5 years.
I just like the way it smells.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the cocaine soften jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working cocaine marijuana piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.