Following is our collection of opiate puns and vert one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Cocain jokes for adults, dirty opium jokes and clean drugs dad gags for kids.
Police Let It Go With A Warning
Unless it's dissolved in water.
Enough to kill two and a half men.
I've been doing it for 5 years i would know
a buttload.
White powder!
but it smells amazing!
I can't find my cocaine.
A trunkfull.
One of the teachers at my local school for obese children, was fired today. He was fired for doing cocaine before going to work. He was ratted out by his large pupils.
enough to kill 2 1/2 men.
It's not all it's cracked up to be.
The first line is quite big, but then the lines get smaller and smaller and smaller...
I thought that might crack you up
A few anagrams.
But it does smell pretty good
I should know. Ive being doing it for years
Just another bump in the road
It's just Michael Caine saying his own name
It blows.
..That the cops just let it go with a warning.
That it's first words were: mmm, delicious quinoa, susan
He's always sticking his business in other people's noses.
You gotta cokes him in
I tried and failed to use cocaine. It kept falling off the mirror in the bathroom.
He'd say "blow me"!
But lets just say that I crack under pressure.
He was always turning up his nose!
There is an abundance of junkies jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 31 funniest jokes and cocain puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any heroin witze you can hear about cocain.
Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.