Coats Jokes

Following is our collection of trench puns and mink coat one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Coats jokes for adults, dirty camouflage jokes and clean coat dad gags for kids.

The Best Coats Puns

What is communism?

- Let me explain.. If you had 2 yachts and your friend had none, wouldn't you give him one?
- Of course.
- Well, that's communism. Another example, if you had 2 homes and your friend had none, wouldn't you give him one?
- Of course I would.
- See, its easy. If you had 2 coats for example and your friend had none, wouldn't you give him one?
- No!
- No? Why not?
- Because I *do* have 2 coats

Car broke down.

While driving to work one day, a man's car breaks down. He eases it over to the shoulder and gets out. He pops open the trunk and two naked men in trench coats hop out, walk a few feet behind the car and start opening and closing their coats.

Naturally, this causes a pileup, which brings out a number of police officers. The driver is flustered as officers question him. "My car broke down, so I pulled off to the side and put out my emergency flashers..."

Overcrowded church

The two thousand member Baptist church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The preacher was ready to start the sermon when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered thru the rear of the church.

One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed at the back of the church. They both then reached under their coats and withdrew automatic weapons.

The one in the middle announced, "Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jesus stay in your seats!"

Naturally, the pews emptied, followed by the choir. The deacons ran out the door, followed by the choir director and the assistant pastor.

After a few moments, there were only three people left sitting in the church. The preacher was holding steady in the pulpit.

The men put their weapons away and said, gently, to the preacher, "All right, pastor, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin the service."

A businessman went into the office and found an inexperienced handyman painting the walls.

The handyman was wearing two heavy parkas on a hot summer day.

Thinking this was a little strange, the businessman asked the handyman why he was wearing the parkas on such a hot day.

The handyman showed him the instructions on the can of paint. They read: For best results, put on two coats.

Why are so many hipsters sweaty?

They put on their winter coats before it's cool.


What happened when the Eskimo teens went clubbing?

They got new fur coats.

Why was the paint on the wall so cold?

It needed more coats!!

Blonde painting a house

Did you hear about the blonde who wore two jackets when she painted the house?

The instructions on the can said: "Put on two coats."

I went to the store to buy some camouflage coats.

But I couldn't find any.

Cats

They lay around and sleep all day, you can tell them any joke and they won't laugh, and they just wanna be away from you. So, cats are just teenagers in fur coats.

Two guys wearing white coats are talking at a mental asylum

One guy says : "So, you're the patient who thinks he's a doctor ?"

The other guy responds : "Go back to your room !"


How my dad taught me how to button my suit coats.

He said *"Think of it like a woman; sometimes the top, always the middle, but never the bottom."*

I'm starting a new line of reversible coats

I can't wait to see how they turn out

Why did the painter give the wall 2 coats?

Because it was winter

What's the difference between an iceberg and a clothes brush?

One crushes boats and the other brushes coats!

Why doesn't anyone get laid on Thanksgiving?

All the coats are on the bed!

Russia Jokes

Submit your best Russia jokes.

Mine are "Why was everybody in Russia rushin'? Because nobody wanted to be Stalin." and "Why were Russians wearing bear fur coats? Because Lenins weren't warm enough for them."

DIY - previous owners thought a bright red living room a good idea. 12 coats of heavy duty primer later...

This Kilz the walls.

I hate procrastinating, it coats me time and effort, I'm gonna do something about it.

But I can do that next week


How do seals keep their coats so smooth?

They use a sea lion.

Best Fashion Link 4 U.S: Winter Coats for Woman

It is a complete Hub of Fashion. Fashion at your doorstep. Latest Fashion of Hair Styles, Shoes, Dresses, Bridal Jewelry, Bridal Dresses, Bridal Photo-shot, Celebrities Pictures, Hollywood Celebrities,Bollywood Celebrities,Lolly wood Celebrities, Fashion Shows, Celebrities Photo-shot and much more. .

If two men are cold on a date, do they give one another their coats?

Why don't black guys wear felt coats?

Because they attract the fuzz.

There is an abundance of closet jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 23 funniest jokes and coats puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any baggy witze you can hear about coats.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes