The Best 18 Clooney Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Clooney jokes. There are some clooney affleck jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these clooney stallone puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Clooney Jokes and Puns

George Clooney, Leonardo Dicaprio and Matthew Mcconaughey got together to make a movie...

George Clooney said, "I'll direct."

Dicaprio said, "I'll produce."

And Matthew McConaughey said, "I'll write, I'll write, I'll write."

When my wife and I got married,

we mutually decided to each select that one person who we'd most like to have sex with and, if by some miracle, it happened, the other wouldn't get angry. She picked Brad Pitt and I went with Uma Thurman (Uma!!). For our 20th anniversary, I thought it would be fun to change things up and she agreed. So, she picked George Clooney and I chose the next door neighbor.

George Clooney, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Matthew McConaughey get together to make a movie.

Clooney says, I'll direct.

DiCaprio says, I'll act.

McConaughey says, I'll write, I'll write, I'll write.

Clooney joke, George Clooney, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Matthew McConaughey get together to make a movie.

George Clooney Matt Damon and Matthew McConaughey got together to make a movie.

George said: I'll Direct

Matt Damon said: I'll produce

Matthew McConaughey said: ill write ill write ill wriite

My wife and I both made a list of five people we could sleep with...

She read hers out: 'One, George Clooney; two, Brad Pitt; three, Justin Timberlake; four, Jake Gyllenhaal; five, Johnny Depp.' I thought, I've got the better deal here: 'One, your sister... That's where our conversation ended..


Leonardo DiCaprio, George Clooney and Matthew McConaughey are sitting around discussing a movie they want to make.

DiCaprio says I'll be the lead actor
Clooney says I guess I'll be the director McConaughey says I'll write, I'll write, I'll write

My wife told me this one...

Leonardo DiCaprio, George Clooney and Matthew McConaughey are sitting around discussing a movie they want to make.

DiCaprio says I'll be the lead actor

Clooney says I guess I'll be the director then

McConaughey says I'll write, I'll write, I'll write

Clooney joke, My wife told me this one...

George Clooney Leonardo DiCaprio and Matthew McConaughey get together to make a new film.

George Clooney says he's gonna direct Leonardo DiCaprio says he's gonna be the producer and Matthew McConaughey says I'll write I'll writte I'll write

George Takei, George Clooney, George Lucas, and George R.R. Martin decided to have a barbecue.

They named their little get-together the "George" Four-Man Grill.

What do you call a George Clooney sex party?

A Georgy. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

George Clooney creates an iTunes playlist and fills it with various cartoon soundtracks.

Clooney Tunes

You can explore clooney hathaway reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean clooney adaptation dad jokes. There are also clooney puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


George Clooney, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Mathew McConaughey are in a coffee shop to discuss a new movie:

Clooney: I'll direct.

DiCaprio: I'll act.

McConaughey: I'll write, I'll write, I'll write.

If George Clooney...

What would George Clooney call his iTunes playlist?

Clooney Tunes.

Badum tsssh..

What does George Clooney say whenever you catch him masturbating?

"I'm a Fapper Dan man :/"

Once you've seen one Clooney wife...

you've seen Amal.

Hey George Clooney, do you go to a store?

Clooney: Why would I go to a store when I have AMAL?

Clooney joke, Hey George Clooney, do you go to a store?

George Clooney is an excellent Pokémon trainer

He caught Amal

How do you become friends with Ben Affleck?

Mistake him for George Clooney.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the clooney zac jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working clooney streep piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes