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Clooney Jokes

19 clooney jokes and hilarious clooney puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about clooney that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Clooney Short Jokes

Short clooney jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The clooney humour may include short george clooney jokes also.

  1. I just found out that George Clooney's wife has a twin brother named Juan who looks exactly like her Some people say that once you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal
  2. George Takei, George Clooney, George Lucas, and George R.R. Martin decided to have a barbecue. They named their little get-together the "George" Four-Man Grill.
  3. George Clooney creates an iTunes playlist and fills it with various cartoon soundtracks. Clooney Tunes
  4. If George Clooney... What would George Clooney call his iTunes playlist?
    Clooney Tunes.
    Badum tsssh..
  5. Hey George Clooney, do you go to a store? Clooney: Why would I go to a store when I have AMAL?
  6. George Clooney opened an animation studio... ...his first cartoon was called "The Clooney Toons"

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Clooney One Liners

Which clooney one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with clooney? I can suggest the ones about sequel and remake.

  1. Here's the thing about George Clooney's wives... Once you've seen one, you've seen Amal.
  2. George Clooney is an excellent Pokémon trainer He caught Amal
  3. How do you become friends with Ben Affleck? Mistake him for George Clooney.
  4. What do you call a George Clooney s**... party? A Georgy. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  5. Once you've seen one Clooney wife... you've seen Amal.
Clooney joke, Once you've seen one Clooney wife...

Giggle-Inducing Clooney Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends

What funny jokes about clooney you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean blockbuster jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make clooney pranks.

George Clooney, Leonardo Dicaprio and Matthew Mcconaughey got together to make a movie...

George Clooney said, "I'll direct."
Dicaprio said, "I'll produce."
And Matthew McConaughey said, "I'll write, I'll write, I'll write."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

When my wife and I got married,

we mutually decided to each select that one person who we'd most like to have s**... with and, if by some miracle, it happened, the other wouldn't get angry. She picked Brad Pitt and I went with Uma Thurman (Uma!!). For our 20th anniversary, I thought it would be fun to change things up and she agreed. So, she picked George Clooney and I chose the next door neighbor.

My wife and I both made a list of five people we could sleep with...

She read hers out: 'One, George Clooney; two, Brad Pitt; three, Justin Timberlake; four, Jake Gyllenhaal; five, Johnny Depp.' I thought, I've got the better deal here: 'One, your sister... That's where our conversation ended..

Idina Menzel and Kristin Chenoweth walk into a restaurant...

They're waiting to be seated, when they spot Sandra Bullock and George Clooney sitting at a table nearby.
Suddenly and without warning they run over to the pair's table and start screaming and shouting:
"No!"
"You cannot, and shall not!"
"We will not let you! Ever!"
Security are called, and the two actresses are escorted away.
As they are leaving, the security guard says:
"What in blazes were you doing?"
The pair look at each other and, as one reply:
"Defying Gravity"
-----
My only original joke ever.

George Clooney, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Mathew McConaughey are in a coffee shop to discuss a new movie:

Clooney: I'll direct.
DiCaprio: I'll act.
McConaughey: I'll write, I'll write, I'll write.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What does George Clooney say whenever you catch him m**...?

"I'm a Fapper Dan man :/"

Clooney joke, How do you become friends with Ben Affleck?