clogged Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious clogged puns

Wife: "I shaved down there. You know what that means..."

Husband: "Yeah, the drain is clogged again."


My girlfriend came out of the shower

and said "I shaved my pussy, you know what that means?"

I said yeah,"the damn drain is clogged again!".


Best jokes come from real life. This happened this morning.

The toilet is clogged. My wife and I both insist we've only gone #1.

One of us is full of crap and the other one is full of crap.


A plumber rings the doorbell

"Come in", says the homeowner, Stacy.

"Hi, I am the plumber, sorry for being a bit late"

"That's fine, my sister must have called for you"

"Alright. So where's that disgusting clogged up mess?"

"Her name actually is Rita, and she's not home at the moment".


My girlfriend came out of the shower...

She said, I shaved my pussy, do you know what that means?
I said, Yeah, the fucking drain is clogged.


The toilets at the philosophy convention were clogged.

That was some deep shit man.


Four students are having a problem with their car...

Four students are having a problem with their car and are forced to stop on the side of the road.
"The ignition is damaged" says the electrical engineer.
"The fuel pipe is clogged" says the chemist.
"Engines is damaged" says the engineer.

"Lets just get out of the car and get in again" says the computer scientist.


Found a wooden shoe in my toilet

it was clogged

saw on last comic standing


I was really on my game today. Then the toilet clogged.

Now I'm all flush-turd.


My nose was clogged the other day.

A dutch woman kicked me right in the face.


This morning the toilet was clogged...

and me and Dad insisted we only did #1.

One of us is full of crap and the other is full of crap.


A man's girlfriend shaves her pussy in the shower.

His girlfriend says "Hey babe, I shaved my know what that means?"

The man replies "Yeah, the fucking drain is clogged again."


I tried to flush a wooden shoe down my toilet.

It got clogged.


My wife came out of the shower and said, "I shaved "down there". You know what that means?"

I said, "Yeah you clogged the drain again."


The other day my girlfriend clogged the toilet and I had to unclog it

she was wrong, anal is definitely possible


I'm tired of my wife complaining about the clogged septic system...

She keeps bringing that shit up.


Did you hear about the mishap at the Asia Summit?

The Chinese government is seeking answers after the recent Beijing Conference. Apparently, several of Obama's and Putin's private bodyguards were the last to use one of the royal toilets before it was reported clogged.

Obama announced that he will ask congress to create a commission to investigate the incident while Putin denies that his forces ever entered the bathroom.


The number of times my shower drain has been clogged since my girlfriend has moved out has been zero

Also the number of times I've gotten laid since she moved out has also been zero.


My toilet got completely clogged...

Wooden shoe know it!


Scary Movies

Billy was constipated really bad one night and decided to take his date out to a movie rather than dinner. With his bowels clogged, he figured it best to avoid a restaurant and food. He'd heard from a friend that taking a girl to a horror flick raises his chances of getting the girl in bed. About halfway through the movie, Billy is pretty sure he has his date right where he wants her. But then the movie gets to the freakiest scene where a clown jumps out from the closet with a knife, and it scares the shit out of Billy. After the movie, he takes her to a restaurant.


Clogged the toilet using too much toilet paper.

It's not the crime, it's the cover-up


A whale washed up dead the other day.

Sea men clogged up her throat.


bad relationship is like a clogged toilet

more you put into it more shit come out



Wife: You clogged the toilet.
Husband: its your problem now
Wife: How do you Figure?
Husband: I have relieved myself of duty.


Was getting water from a water hole on my property when i realized it was clogged with rocks

Well damn.


A bunch of my friends told me pot brownies are awesome and I should try some.

I dont know what they're talking about cause all I got is a headache and a clogged bong.


Just clogged up the toilet

Wouldn't be the first time


The plumber pulled my wife's glasses from the clogged toilet...

...they have seen some shit.


Some asshole just clogged my toilet


I choked on acorn the other day.

The squirrels nut clogged my throat


toilet issues

why did the dutch man have to get off the toilet?
because it was all clogged up!


Why are business men's toilet clogged?

They gave too many shits


What always clogged the toilet on the USS Enterprise?

Captain's Log


It's literally an "Oh shit!" moment...

When you look down to your clogged toilet.


What does the world of politics have in common with my toilet?

They're both clogged with shit.


What are the most funny Clogged jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Clogged? Well, here are the best Clogged dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Clogged pick up lines to share with friends.

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