Clip Jokes

Following is our collection of cut puns and neurons one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Clip jokes for adults, dirty scraper jokes and clean blank dad gags for kids.

The Best Clip Puns

Horseshoes look more like sandals than shoes...

They should be called Clip Clops.

clip clop clip clop clip clop BANG clip clop clip clop

Amish drive-by shooting.

What makes the sound 'Clip clop bang clip clop'?

An Amish drive-by

What goes clip clop clip clop bang bang?

An amish drive-by shooting

What do you call a Paper Clip that is not used for paper?

Useless.


What goes clip clop clip clop bang bang bang clip clop clip clop

An Amish drive by shooting

You know, studies show that keeping a ladder inside the house is more dangerous than a loaded gun.

That's why I own ten guns. In case some maniac tries to sneak in a ladder!

^(Source: Gravity Falls. Can't find a good clip of the moment)

What goes clippity-clop bang, clippity-clop bang, clippity-clop bang?

An Amish drive by.

What wouldn't MacGyver be able to escape from using a paper clip?

A desk job

I'm going to have to clip my finger nails soon...

There getting out of hand

My girlfriend: Oh baby I want you to tease me.

Me: Plays three seconds of the SpongeBob Sweet Victory clip.

My Girlfriend: Oooh you dirty tease!


What goes "clip clip BANG"

What goes, "Clip clop clip clop clip clop clip clop BANG BANG clip clop clip clop clip clop..."


An Amish drive-by shooting.

What did the paper clip say?

It looks like you're writing unsubstantiated nonsense. Would you like to turn on all caps?

Time to clip my toenails

There's no talon when i'll cut em

I just clipped the worst ingrown toe-nail...

It was a feet.

Why is something that keeps you from burning your fingers on a joint called a roach clip?

Because potholder was already taken

Why was Clippy let go from Microsoft?

He got bent out of shape when they threatened to replace him, and just couldn't hold anything together.

Youve heard of a dine-and-dash, but what's it called when you're getting a haircut?

A clip and dip.

What does a Chicago cop say after emptying his clip into a fleeing suspect?

"Stop. Police."


I just had to clip my nails...

They were getting out of hand.

I like to play russian roulette...

with only one bullet in the clip.

Remember that audio clip that went viral?

The one where different people heard different a word? Well, the person who discovered that clip hasn't found another internet sensation since. Guess you could say they're resting on their Yannys.

Watched a YouTube clip staring a special needs comedian

I wanted to post below about how inspiring it was but it said, "comments are disabled" [True story]

What music do horses listen to?

Clip Clop.

As I passed the doobie to Dave, I pondered thoughtfully, "Why is a roach clip called a roach clip?"

As Dave inhaled, he wheezed, "Because potholder was already taken..."

HOW MANY PAPER CLIP IS TAKE TO CONSTRUCT HAMMER

NEED TOO MANY, BETTER GO TO THE OFFICE STORE HO HO HO

Clippy is in need of help as he is at a clift about to fall and the man says:

Would you like help?

People with Bluetooth headsets need a clip round the ear!

how to keep all your work you've typed up in microsoft word.

you need a paper clip and a chainsaw to tell clippy to stop telling me to turn all caps.

WARNING: if you see links offering a free clip of the new Nickelback album DO NOT CLICK!!!!! It links to a free clip of the new Nickelback album!!!

Why are YouTuber's so unhyginic?

They cannot clip their huge thumbnail.

There is an abundance of paperclip jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 31 funniest jokes and clip puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any footage witze you can hear about clip.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes