Clinic Jokes

• Short Clinic Jokes
• Clinic One Liners
• Doctor Clinic Jokes
• Eye Clinic Jokes
• Mayo Clinic Jokes
• Memory Clinic Jokes
• Vet Clinic Jokes
• More Clinic Jokes

Funniest Clinic Short Jokes

Short clinic jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The clinic humour may include short hospital jokes also.

1. I accidentally locked my key in my car in front of an abortion clinic... They gave me the dirtiest look when I went in and asked to borrow a coathanger.
2. I locked my keys in my car outside an abortion clinic They get really angry if you go in and ask for a coat hanger
3. What is the worst part about locking your keys inside your car outside an abortion clinic? Having to go inside and asking for a coat hanger.
4. A priest, a pastor and a rabbit walk in to a blood donation clinic The nurse asked the rabbit, What's your blood type?
   I'm probably a type-O said the rabbit.
5. I just found out there's a clinical diagnosis for when you can't sleep and so you spend the whole night eating. It's called insomnomnomnomnia.
6. My uncle runs a clinic inside a hotel in Spain He come out late at night to ring people's doorbells.
   
   Because nobody suspects The Spanish Inn Physician
7. An unemployed engineer opens a clinic... He soon goes out of business, since the field is over saturated due to all the unemployed engineers opening clinics recently.
8. Abortion clinics should be banned Those doctors demonstrate a complete lack of humanity. Spawn killing is a filthy tactic.
9. What's worse than locking your keys in your car at the abortion clinic? When you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.
10. My friend is quitting his job at the erectile dysfunction clinic... He hasn't gotten a raise in years.

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Clinic One Liners

Which clinic one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with clinic? I can suggest the ones about club and medicine.

1. When cops arrest a clinically insane person... ...are they busting a nut?
2. I finally found out what they call the vacuum at the abortion clinic Woomba
3. I love volunteering at the AIDS clinic. Everybody is so positive.
4. I'm going to start an abortion clinic... ...called "Don't Kid Yourself."
5. I thought of a great name for an abortion clinic... How about 'Birth Ctrl+Z' ?
6. I know 3 people who are clinically insane: Me.
7. I know five people who are clinically insane... I'm two of them.
8. I'm going to start a charity for the clinically insane. Gonna call it "Fundamental"
9. Tried going to the obesity clinic before work today. But the queue was enormous.
10. A patient broke out of an amputation clinic! Don't worry, hes unarmed
11. What do you call a black abortion clinic? Crime stoppers
12. Two thieves walk into an amputee clinic. "Everybody put your hand up!"
13. A sign at the fertility clinic. Please wait to be seeded.
14. What is long, hard to handle and keeps her up all night? Clinical Depression
15. Pro Life Tip PLT : Avoid Abortion Clinics

Doctor Clinic Jokes

Here is a list of funny doctor clinic jokes and even better doctor clinic puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A Saudi woman in a doctor's clinic. Doctor: Mrs Saud there's a good news for you.
  Woman: Excuse me, it's Miss Saud not Mrs Saud.
  Doctor: Miss Saud there's a bad news for you.
• A doctor once got rich when he realized he could run a lucrative circumcising clinic by keeping all the tips
• A man walks in to a medical clinic and asks to see a doctor. The receptionist makes him an appointment. How about 10 tomorrow? Man: I don't need that many .
• Why did the clinic go out of business? Because the doctors had no patience.
• A patient and his doctor were sitting in the doctor's clinic. Doctor: "I regret to inform you that you have cancer and Alzheimers". Patient: "Oh well, at least I don't have cancer".
• Playing doctors and nurses with the wife in the bedroom last night didn't go very well. Especially when I diagnosed her as clinically obese.
• Where do food condiments go when they need to see a doctor? The Mayo clinic
• What did the doctor say when all of his clientele started going to the clinic across the street? I'm losing my patience.
• In front of a mental clinic, a patient was pulling a rope. Doctor: why are you pulling that rope?
  Patient: what do you want me to do, push it?!
• I went to the health clinic the other day... My doctor said I weighed 483 pounds but I shouldn't worry about it because we are in the UK

Eye Clinic Jokes

Here is a list of funny eye clinic jokes and even better eye clinic puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Opening a laser eye clinic. Going to name it CircumVision... SEE what I did there?
• Last week, I saw a man fall face first into some stinging nettles... but luckily he was right next to an eye clinic.
  I thought, well that's a sight for sore eyes.
  ​
• A Soviet citizen entered a medical clinic one day and asked to see an ear-and-eye doctor. Asked about is problem, the man replied, "Well, I keep hearing one thing and seeing another."
• A Baby Boomer Eye Surgeon opened a clinic that specializes in treating Millenials. It's called, "We Do Real Eyes."
• People have become so mean, ruthless and straightforward these days I tell you, There is an eye clinic in my colony named "Asif Eye Care"
• Saw Marshawn l**... at the eye clinic a few days ago. He told me he was just there so he won't get blind.

Mayo Clinic Jokes

Here is a list of funny mayo clinic jokes and even better mayo clinic puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Did you hear about the injured condiment? He had to be rushed to the Mayo Clinic.
• Me, on the phone: I have a complaint. Every time I make a sandwich, it's always too dry. Guy on the other end: Sir, that's not what we do at the Mayo Clinic.
• Where does the thick, creamy dressing go when it gets sick? The Mayo Clinic.
• Where do you go if you don't like mustard? Mayo clinic
• Tequila Addiction They're opening a new center to treat tequila addiction in Rochester, Minnesota. It will be known as the cinco de mayo Clinic.
• Did you hear about the experimental procedure used at the Mayo Clinic recently? The surgeons cut off a man's entire left side, so now he's alright.
• They do surprisingly little BLT research at The Mayo Clinic.
• BIG CHANGES COMING AT THE MAYO CLINIC! They're switching to mustard!

Memory Clinic Jokes

Here is a list of funny memory clinic jokes and even better memory clinic puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I keep getting bills from the Memory Erasing Clinic but I've never been there.

Vet Clinic Jokes

Here is a list of funny vet clinic jokes and even better vet clinic puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• My wife got a new job at a vet clinic, and almost killed a dog her first day. (Oc) But she's getting better at euthanasia.

Giggle-Inducing Clinic Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends

What funny jokes about clinic you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean church jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make clinic pranks.