Climbers Jokes

Following is our collection of ascend puns and edge one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Climbers jokes for adults, dirty sherpa jokes and clean geologist dad gags for kids.

The Best Climbers Puns

In 1939, an unusual farm animal named Gertrude became the first cow to climb to the peak of Everest carrying gear for the climbers, setting a world record that still stands unbroken.

Since then, the steaks have never been higher.

Tour guide in the mountain

A guide was leading a group of people on a hike through some mountains. He pointed at a fairly majestic looking peak and said "This one is most popular with mountain climbers. Most days you have a few teams doing a climb. The ascent, depending on your skill level can take between two and five hours. The descent, again depending on your skill level, takes anywhere between 4 hours and 30 seconds."

What mountaintop is infamous for making climbers disappear?

\- Peak Aboo.

And which one gives them a flu?

\- Peak Achoo.

Father: "Son, you shall follow in my footsteps of escorting climbers up Mt Everest."

Son: "Sher pa."

Why are most mountain climbers hippies?

Because scalars have no direction

(OC, as far as I know)


Racial jokes (if you're offended by these, then just deal with it)

- Why did the Jews wonder in the desert for 40 years? Because somebody dropped a quarter.

- What do you call a black guy with a new bike? A thief.

- Why doesn't Mexico have an oplymics team? Because America already has all of their good runners, swimmers,and climbers.

Most avid climbers agree that small mountains are jokes.

They think they're just hill areas.

So many women in the world, but out of all the men in the world who has the best picks?

Probably climbers and miners.

At the top of Mt. Everest, two climbers get in a fight.

It was all downhill from there.

Why are stoners such good mountain climbers?

because they're used to being high

How many flat earthers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Three experts in logistics, one metereologist, two cooks plus six foragers, two engineers, two pilots, two drivers, one cartographer, a steward, a communications expert, someone in charge of the journal, eight porters, five mountain climbers, five divers, two armed bodyguards, and a captain for the expedition that will find the secret instructions written 6000 years ago on stone tablets by the Mayas.


What do rock climbers and authoritarian governments have in common?

Controlled descents/dissents

There is an abundance of boulder jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 12 funniest jokes and climbers puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any downhill witze you can hear about climbers.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes