Climate Jokes

Following is our collection of temperature puns and governments one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Climate jokes for adults, dirty environmental jokes and clean rosetta dad gags for kids.

The Best Climate Puns

How do you solve climate change?

Convince Republicans that rising temperatures are turning people gay.

English Weather

I just read something about weather in England:

The Archbishop of Canterbury and The Royal Commission for Political Correctness announced today that the climate in the UK should no longer be referred to as _'English Weather'._

In order to no longer offend a sizable portion of the UK population, it will now be referred to as _'Muslim Weather'_ -- partly Sunni, but mostly Shi'ite.

Trump has left the historical Paris Climate Accord in which countries around the world agreed to fight global warming...

It was the first time he pulled out of a working model.

How can we get Republicans to care about climate change?

Blame it on the poor.

How do weathermen get up a mountain?

They climate


I haven't always believed in climate change

But I'm warming up to the theory.

If Trump continues his anti climate change campaign and the provocation towards North Korea the only wall we will be building will be...

Wall-E

Why did the weatherman blush?

He saw the climate change

I saw a climate scientist eating pasta out of a pink leather bowl

He was eating carb on dyed ox hide

I don't care much for political jokes. But I was thinking what would Reagan think of our current toxic political climate if he was alive today?

I think he would say " WHY WON'T SOMEONE LET ME OUT OF THIS BOX"

Anyone who believes in climate change just believes whatever someone tells them to. They don't think for themselves.

I know that because Alex Jones told me so


What do climate change scientists and Donald Trump have in common?

Each is desperately hoping the other is a hoax.

How do you get to the top of a weather beacon?

Climate

What's the main cause of Climate Change?

Somebody lit the dinosaurs on fire.

Quarters and nickels fall from the sky...

Me: what is this?

Climate: change.

*coins falling from the sky*

Me: what is this?
Climate: change

αΈ±ley (Proto-Indo-European)-> κλίμα, κλίνω (Greek)-> clima (Latin)-> climat (French)-> climate

Climate change is man-made.

Why are conservatives climate change deniers?

Because they want to melt the snowflakes!

What do you get when a climate change activist creates computer code?

An Al Gore Rythym


What climate scientist does Disney follow on twitter?

The rogue one

How does Trump not believe in climate change?

He can't stop melting down

What do climatologists use to predict the global climate?

AlGorerithums

Tourist: what's the weather like on top of the mountain?

Local: I don't know man, climate.

What is the warmest period in the history of the world's climate called?

Climax.

Hippopotamuses are seemingly unconcerned about the effects of climate change on their habitat

It's as if they lived in de Nile

The difference between weather and climate.

Weather is the atmospheric conditions in a location at a given time, example, rain in Seattle.

Climate is weather over a period of time in a location, example, rain in Seattle.

Hollywood is really taking climate change seriously

Vin Diesel even changed his name to Vin Solar

What do you call a midget who lives in a tropical climate?

A little humid.

Your mother is so fat

that if she farts, sheΒ΄s going to get charged with climate warming.

TIL Most of the world's coco is produced in Africa.

This is because of part of the continent's tropical savanna climate, particularly its precipitation. I love chocolate, so I'm really grateful for this.

Next time I eat a candy bar, I'll have to bless the rains down in Africa.

What do you call a white supremacist that doesn't eat meat?

A VegitAryan

This has nothing to with the current political climate. I work with several vegetarians and we were talking about food today and it the joke just hit me.

Why is climate change good for shy people at parties?

It's a good ice breaker

Science: cowfarts cause climate change. Vegetarians: I'll have what the cows are eating.

Science: cowfarts cause climate change.

Vegetarians: I'll have what the cows are eating.

Is climate change leading to more wildfires?

Without a drought

Trump only pulled out of the Paris Climate Agreement because he was standing up for his own kind

After all, he is just a load of hot air

I made a political joke up just now...

Given the current temperature of the political climate....

Do you think we can all finally agree on climate change?

I guess China will save the world's climate.

They are not fond of global warning.

What did the climate change journalist say to their boss when they couldn't find anyone to interview in the rainforest?

I'm sorry sir, but there are scant tree-sources out here.

I've had it with climate change deniers...

The global warming truthers are so anti-climatic!

What's the difference between climate change and obesity?

One's a worldwide problem.

The other's a wideworld problem.

I didn't get too worked up over Trumps decision on the climate accord...

the whole thing was rather anti-climatic.

Donald Trump pulls out of Paris Climate Arrangement after alleged threats to interfere with the U.S. Mexico border wall.

He heard "Climb-it" deal, and flipped out

I would participate in the climate march

But it's too hot.

Americans want change? They're going to get change...

Climate change, pocket change...

There is an abundance of celsius jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 44 funniest jokes and climate puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any global witze you can hear about climate.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes