Cleaners Jokes

Following is our collection of globally puns and hoover one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Cleaners jokes for adults, dirty janitor jokes and clean dust dad gags for kids.

The Best Cleaners Puns

A blonde goes to the dry cleaners.

She tells the attendant that she needs to have her dress cleaned.

However, the attendant wasn't paying attention. Snapping out of his day dream, he asked, "Come again?"

Giggling, the blonde replied, "No, just mustard this time."

A blonde drops off her dress to the dry cleaners

The lady says, "Come Again!"

The blonde says, "No, it's toothpaste this time."

A girl walks in to the dry cleaners

A girl walks in to the dry cleaners and places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress".

The clerk was somewhat preoccupied and didn't quite catch what she said, so he asked "Come again?".

"No. This time it's mayonnaise"

A blonde drops off a shirt at the cleaners...

A blonde drops off a shirt at the cleaners. On the way out of the door the lady at the counter says come again. The blonde says no, its toothpaste this time.

Lindsay Lohan got her blouse dirty...

..and had to take it to the dry cleaners. She says "I need to get this cleaned" to the man behind the counter. The man who was hard of hearing replies "come again?", Lindsay responds "No, mustard".

A lady walks into a dry cleaners...

...she's carrying a beautiful black dress. She tells the clerk, "I'll need to pick this up tomorrow."

The clerk, hard of hearing and distracted, innocently asks, "come again?"

Unfazed, she replies, "No. Vanilla ice cream this time."

Dry cleaners.

A hot blond walks into a Dry cleaners. She tells the teller "I need to get a stain removed from my sweater. The teller being a little hard of hearing asks "Come again?" To which she replied " No, its mustard."

A blonde drops off her dress at the dry cleaners,

The dry cleaner says come again
The blonde says it's toothpaste this time

Monica Lewinsky walks into a cleaners....

with a dress and yells at the old owner who is hard of hearing

"I need to dry clean my dress"

The owner cups his hand next to his ear

"come again"

"No it's ketchup this time"

A lady goes into the dry cleaners

Lady: "I was wondering if you could get this stain out of my blouse"

The Clerk: "Come again?"

Lady: "No, this time it's just yogurt"

A woman walks into a dry cleaners....

She says to the guy at the counter "Hopefully you have the expertise to apply a suitable chemical procedure to eliminate this unsightly blemish from my favourite frock."

He says, "Come again?"

She says, "No, it's mayonnaise this time."

A woman walks into the dry cleaners...

Clerk: Hello ma'am, what can we do for you?

Woman: I would like to drop off my coat.

Clerk: Ok, what would you like us to do with it?

Woman: I would like you to get the stain out of the collar area.

Clerk: Come again?

Woman: No, it's mustard this time.

Monica Lewinsky walks into her dry cleaners

Monica Lewinsky walks into her dry cleaners, the guy is a little old and hard of hearing. Monica says "i need to get this dress cleaned, no starch, use the same hanger."
The dry cleaner responds "come again?"
Monica says "nope, this time it's mustard."

A blonde dropped her shirt in at the cleaners... "come again" the shop assistant said as the lady left...

"No just toothpaste", she replied.

Everyone in Britain prefers brushes over vacuum cleaners when it comes to tidying their floors.

Sorry if that's a sweeping generalisation.

Microsoft will start making ...

vacuum cleaners. It will be the only thing they make that doesn't suck.

What do you call fast midget house cleaners?

Minute maids.

What is the best introduction you can think of for this punchline?

My friends and I are absolutely convinced that there is no possible way to create a funny joke out of this:

"And that's why they invented dry cleaners"

The woman in the store

A woman walks into a store. Billy the clerk and the manager are talking away, and the woman asks the clerk where some stuff is.

Woman: "Excuse me sir, do you know where the Kleenex, toilet paper, ear cleaners, napkins, and tampons are?

The manager replies with, "Dear Lord Billy, help her! She's leaking from every hole!"

How do you contact dead window cleaners?

Use a squeegee board.

Bill Clinton takes a dress to the dry cleaners...

He asks the laundress to get a stain out of the dress, but she doesn't quite hear him with the machines running.

"Come again?" she says.

"Actually, it's mustard this time."

What's the difference between a woman and a vacuum cleaner?

Vacuum cleaners don't shout at you for not wearing a condom

A blonde goes to the dry cleaners

She hands him her dress which has a huge stain in the front. She pays him and says "I need this dress for a party. So can you please get it cleaned by Thursday?" Now the dry cleaner was very old and couldn't hear properly so he asks her "Come again?"
The blonde blushes furiously and says "No, it is mayonnaise this time"

Walked into a dry cleaners the other day and I was amazed.

The chap behind the counter had fluorescent blue gel like hands. To my further amazement, he was using them as detergent on the clothes.

I said, excuse me sir, may I ask you to hold my bag whilst I take a photo of your appendages?! I feel like the internet would be amazed at this

He said I can't sorry, my hands are tide

I don't care what you say about vacuum cleaners

They still suck
Just like this joke

I went to pick up from the dry cleaners, but the shop was closed.

They were away, attending to pressing matters.

This one might be a stretch

Which Star Trek character do cleaners hate the most?

Mister Spock

Missed a spot... yah. :'(

Monica Lewinski walks into the dry cleaners

She says, "I have another dress for you to clean."

The owner who is slightly hard of hearing replies, "Come again?"

"Oh no, it's just mustard"

Georgia and Alabama hate each other

Really we have very similar jokes for each other. In Georgia we say that we know the tooth brush was invented in Alabama because if it was invented anywhere else it'd be called a teeth brush. In Alabama they say that we sure have some strange uses for those grout cleaners.

Why do we still use vacuum cleaners?

I mean.... They suck.

I was talking to the man at the dry cleaners.

I said, "Can I drop my trousers here tomorrow?"

He said, "Of course."

I'm now banned for indecent exposure.

True house cleaners aren't just born

They're maid

A blonde walks into a very noisy dry cleaners..

blonde: "Could you get this stain out for me please"

cashier: "COME AGAIN?"


I like my women like I like my vacuum cleaners

Cordless and with powerful suction

So whats the deal with latin music artists and their obsession with those little automated vacuum cleaners?


Why do professional product reviewers like vacuum cleaners?

No matter how good or bad it is, they can truthfully say "it sucks."

Two Cleaners in a car...

Broom Broom

What do modern-day witches ride?

Vacuum cleaners

What do you call a Christian who comes to your door to sell you vacuum cleaners?

A Jehoover's Witness

Did ya hear about the new dry cleaners who only had a couple of customers?

They had two clothes

I was meeting a friend at a smoke shop and accidentally went into the dry cleaners next door...

Clothes, but no cigar.

What animal SHOULD be scared of vacuum cleaners?

Dust bunnies.

Why wasn't the coup in Turkey on Wednesday?

Erdogan's suit wasn't back from the cleaners.

A blonde drops a dress off at the cleaners

As she's leaving the lady behind the counter says "come again"

The blonde says "no just toothpaste this time"

My friend got fired from his job selling industrial vacuum cleaners.

It's cool though he said it sucked.

I'm going to strike while the iron is hot.

And if that doesn't work, I'm starting a union for dry cleaners.

Why did the dry cleaners get shut down?

The owner was arrested for money laundry-ing

I really dislike going to the dry cleaners

I can't stand perchloroethylene and I don't like glycol ether.

The dry cleaners called

Told me I had accidentally left my credit card in a pair of pants. I told them not to press any charges.

Vacuum Cleaners vs Girlfirends

What do vacuum cleaners and girlfriends have in common?

Both lose suction after a while, so it's best to get a new one.

I bet those window cleaners on the World Trade Centre were wishing it was an inside job.

Opinions are like vacuum cleaners

Everyone has one, and only the really messed up ones don't suck.

There is an abundance of drycleaning jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 52 funniest jokes and cleaners puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any grout witze you can hear about cleaners.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes