Clean Dad Jokes
28 clean dad jokes and hilarious clean dad puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about clean dad that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Clean Dad Short Jokes
Short clean dad jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The clean dad humour may include short bad dad jokes also.
- My dad finally got a job, and he has over a 1,000 people under him. He's cleaning headstones at the cemetery.
- My dad asked me why I chose to take up window cleaning as a profession. I told him it was the only job I could really see myself doing.
- When I was a kid, I goofed around with my dad's coffee maker before he got done cleaning it. I managed to get myself grounded.
- What are the most useful things your parents taught you? Cooking, cleaning, sewing...that's what i learnt from my dad. My mum taught me how to make jokes based on stereotypical perceptions of gender.
- When I always got frustrated fishing because my hooks kept getting cleaned off, my Dad would always tell me: To become a master angler, you must first be a master baiter.
- Why do mexican kids feel so comfortable at school? Because their dad built it and their mom keeps it clean.
- A father and his son are watching their dog clean himself... Son: Don't you wish you could do that, Dad?
Dad: Nah, I'm afraid he might bite me. - Office fridge clean out jokes I'm running low on dad jokes about refrigerators Bc this is weekly thing.
- Why did the Mexican boy think the school belonged to him? Because his dad built it and his mom cleans it
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Clean Dad One Liners
Which clean dad one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with clean dad? I can suggest the ones about christmas dad and fat dad.
- My dad wanted me to let you know he's cleaning a window. He just wanted to make it clear.
- Dad Joke: What do you call clean music? A soap opera!
- I have become a master at cleaning my baby after a p**.... I'm a #2 dad.
Delightful Fun Clean Dad Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about clean dad you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dead dad jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make clean dad pranks.
Missing my dad today. Here's the friends in low places parody he used to sing to us at bathtime.
I take baths in wet places
Where the waters warm
And the soap chases my dirty away
I'm clean today
Now I'm not big on washing faces
Think I'll slip on down and wash other places
I take baths
In wet places
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My Dad told me to find a woman that likes to cook, clean, and have s**....
The most important thing though was to make sure that these three women never meet.
Someone brings their new friend over to their house for the first time.
The friend is walking through the living room when they stop at the fireplace and pick up an odd-looking jar that caught their eye. "What's this?" they ask.
The host replies, "Oh, that's my Father's ashes."
Startled, the friend turns and accidentally drops the container onto the floor where it shatters and spills the ashes everywhere. "Oh no! OH NO!! I'm SO sorry!" they exclaim.
"Don't worry about it. We'll just clean it up, my Dad can tap his cigarettes into a mug until he buys another jar from Walmart."
My dad dropped this joke on a dinner with my girlfriend and I couldn't help but to bust out laughing
Girls are like public bathrooms. All the clean ones are always taken and the only ones left are so messed up and dirty you don't want to go inside.
After my friend got COVID, he threw away all his soaps, shampoos and deodorants...
.
.
....because the doctor said he wouldn't smell anymore.
Day 5 of posting clean and soapy dad jokes for a week!
Step-dad tells his step-son to clean his room
Step-son: Am I going to have to pour hot melted cheese all over myself?
Step-dad: Why would you have to do that?
Step-son: To remind you that I'm NACHO son
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
50 Shades of Little Johnny
Johnny's Mum was cleaning under his bed when she found a stash of b**... magazines.
A bit concerned she asks Johnny's Dad what he thinks she should do.
Johnny's Dad responds "whatever else you do, don't s**... him"
In honor of a bath time song sung by a fellow dad...
Here is mine:
Wash your body!
Oh yeah.
Clean your body!
Uh huh
Wash your body!
It's bath time tonight!
Let's get clean, alright!
Clean your fingers and your toes...
Wash your face, don't forget your nose
If it's Monday night we wash your hair.
But everytime wash behind your ears!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Sign over the u**... in Dad's favorite bar
We keep this restroom clean because we aim to please ... so, you aim too, please.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The stupidest thing my dad ever said was that women are only good for s**......
what about cooking and cleaning?!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
When does a regular joke become a dad joke?
When the punchline becomes apparent. Except for the fact it decided to stop being one and mysteriously vanished one night, cleaned out our joint bank account, never calls, never showed up to court, never remembers the kids' birthdays, never made their little league games, refuses to pay child support, refuses to get a job to avoid wage garnishment, and yet somehow manages to go on vacations to Mexico with their f**... 20-year-old girlfriend Chastity. F**K YOU, ALAN!!!
Daddy, why do you do all the work around here?
A young child kept noticing that at his home his dad always seemed to do all the house-work, and his mother did nothing. It was his dad that fixed the meals, shopped for groceries, cleaned the house etc.
Finally, one day, the son goes up to his father and asks him, "Daddy, why do you do all the work around here?"
His dad replies "Well, when you were born, I had a deal with your mother. For my part of the deal, I have to do all the work around here."
"So, what was her part of the deal? Was it worth all the effort that you put in everyday?"
"Ofcourse it was worth the effort, Goku, ofcourse it was."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Philosophy
Dad: Hey son! What did you learn at school today?
Son: Philosophy.
Dad: What's that?
Son: Well there's 2 men standing at the bath tub. They both have to take a bath. One of them is clean and the one is dirty. Bath tub is full of water and cannot be refilled. Who will take the bath first?
Dad: The dirty one!
Son: But if the dirty one takes the bath, how will the clean one take the bath after him? He will get dirty..
Dad: Okay . Well. Then the clean one... He goes first!
Son:. .. but why would a clean person get a bath?
Dad: ..... That's some kind of b**...!
Son: That's philosophy.
