Classical Music Jokes
94 classical music jokes and hilarious classical music puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about classical music that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Classical Music Short Jokes
Short classical music jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The classical music humour may include short classical jokes also.
- String Fight My ex used to hit me with stringed instruments. If only I had known about her history of violin.
- My therapist told me to listen to classical music before work to help with my anger management issues. This morning I woke up and chose violins.
- Suddenly I hear classical music coming from a grave, sounds like its being played backwards? Oh, that's just Beethoven decomposing .
- Symphony of puns i never let my kids listen to jazz or classical music...
Too much sax or violins can only lead to treble! - Earlier today I heard Classical music coming from my wallet.. I opened it, and realised I had 3 tenners in it...
- I'm pretty sure chickens love classical music All I hear from them is "bach bach bach bach bach"
- Arnold Scwharzanegger gets a call from his agent about a feature length film based around classical music. When asked which character he'd most like to play, 'I'll be Bach'.
- So I have this chicken that listens to nothing but classical music... All she wants is Bach Bach Bach .
That is all. - I've been listening to classical music too loud and now my ears hurt. I'm having some pretty bad Bach pains.
- Did you hear about the chicken who liked classical music? I swear it was all he talked about. He would go on and on. "Bach, Bach, Bach"!
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Classical Music One Liners
Which classical music one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with classical music? I can suggest the ones about classical composer and symphony music.
- I bought A LOT of classical music yesterday... ...I went on a Chopin spree!
- In what order do you play Classical Music Songs? Bach to Bach.
- What do you call a microorganism that listens to Classical music? Bach-teria
- What type of classical music do chickens like best? Bach.
- Killer Whales like classical music so much... That they form Orcastras.
- They say classical music was written to speak through the ages Bach to the future.
- I used to only listen to classical music... ...but now I think outside of the Bachs.
- I went to buy some classical music today... But I forgot my Chopin Liszt.
- My dog likes classical music Whenever she hears it, she's always wagner tal.
- Why didn't the pokemon listen to classical music? Because he was lycanroc.
- I don't want to hear any more classical Christmas music I seriously can't handel it.
- What kind of classical music do vegetables like? Anything by a string courgette
- Why do muslims love classical music? It has lots of violins
- How do you threaten a fan of classical music? You tell him to watch his bach.
- What do you call a President who likes classical music? Baroque Obama
Silly & Ridiculous Classical Music Jokes to Spread Joy & Laughter
What funny jokes about classical music you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean instrumental music jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make classical music pranks.
Steven Spielberg was busy discussing his new action adventure about famous classical composers.
Bruce Willis, Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger were in the room.
"Who do you want to play?" Spielberg asked Bruce Willis.
"I've always been a big fan of Chopin," said Bruce.
"I'll play him."
"And you, Sylvester?" asked Spielberg.
"Mozart's the one for me!" said Sly.
"And what about you?" Spielberg asked Arnold Schwarzenegger.
"I'll be Bach," said Arnie.
Why did everyone hate the classical composer's music
Everyone thought he had some sheet music
The day after Beethoven's f**...
The day after Beethoven's f**..., at midnight, a drunken man, having just left the bar, went into the graveyard, where he heard a strange sound. Looking for the source of the mysterious sound, he discovered it was coming from Beethoven's grave. Alarmed, he called his friends, and found they could hear the sound too (even the sober ones).
Soon, a crowd was forming at the graveyard. The mayor, who was very familiar with classical music, recognized the sound as Beethoven's 9th Symphony played backwards. When it ended, Beethoven's 8th Symphony started playing, also backwards, and then the 7th, and then the 6th, and so forth. At dawn, having reached a conclusion, the mayor said to the gathering crowd:
"There's nothing to fear, gentlemen. He's just decomposing."
(Warning:lame music joke. I just came back from a classicical music concert) Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get away from the oboe solo.
Classic Music Joke for the ages
A chef was cooking some fresh beets on a REALLY dilapidated, old stove. The stove was hardly putting out any heat at all and he got so frustrated, he kicked the sorry appliance all the way
across the kitchen, shouting as he went.......... ROLL OVER BEET OVEN!!!
They're making a movie about classical music composers...
They're making a movie about classical music composers. In the middle of the auditions, Arnold Schwarzenegger walked in and simply declared, "I'll be Bach."
Steven Spielberg is casting for his upcoming blockbuster on the history of classical music.
He asks his stars who they want to play. Brad Pitt says, "I want to be Mozart. His pastiche of influences from several European countries has always fascinated me." Tom Cruise chimes in with, "I'd like to be Beethoven. I love the way he handled the transition from Classicism to Romanticism." Arnold Schwarzenegger says, "I'll be Bach."
Steven Spielberg has a new idea for a movie
He says he wants to make an action movie about classical music composers.
Sylvester Stallone says "I wana be Motzart!"
Arnold Schwarzenegger says "In zat case...I'll be Bach"
Did you hear the new classical piece of music commissioned by the church?
It's called "I slipped and fell in A minor".
So I was listening to classical music really loudly the other day when suddenly...
My speakers Baroque.
I like old school music
Classics such as "The wheels on the bus" and "Hot cross buns" from music class
I decided to write down all the pieces of classical music I want to play before I die...
...it's my bucket Liszt.
My wife wants to have the baby listen to classical music while in the w**....
Would an ipod nano or shuffle be easier to get up there?
What's the difference between classical music and Barry white?
A lot when you are having a prostate exam.
I was sitting in a pub discussing classical music and the bartender said
we've had about just enough of your s**... Bartok fella
Hey, did you hear that Bill Cosby is writing classical music?
I just heard his latest piece called, "Quaa De Lude".
Three actors are deciding on roles for a movie about classical music.
Matt Damon, Brad Pitt and Arnold Schwarzenegger are all taking part in a new movie about classical composers.
"I think I'll play Beethoven!" declared Matt.
"I'd like the role of Mozart!" Brad decided.
"I'll be Bach." said Arnie.
Terminator, RoboCop, & Optimus Prime are all together thinking of their next costume for Halloween...
when RoboCop says "We should all be classical musical composers; I'll be..Beethoven!".
Optimus Prime agrees and says "alright - I'll be..Mozart!".
Terminator stands up and says "I'll be Bach!".
Do you want to buy some classical music?
Sorry, I'm baroque.
Arnold Schwarzenegger is actually a talented composer with a love for classical music!
His newest album is titled, "I'll Be Bach."
I've been sat at the piano all day playing classical music...
It's given me a really bad Bach.
Go with him if you want to live
Q) If Arnold Schwarzenegger was a German classical music composer, who would he have been?
A) He'd be Bach.
My girlfriend nicknamed me after a piece of classical music
She calls me Canon in D Major
Pop music is like a party hat
Classic and fun, but you look like a d**... if you put it on in the car.
Why do black people not like Classical music?
Because they have to sit in the Bach of the concert hall.
Why did Karl Marx hate classical music?
Because of the violins inherant in the system
I turn on the radio to a classical music station and the music was getting static
I was getting FeedBach.
Why classical music is not recommended for young people?
Because it contains sax and violins
What do you call Charles Manson's music?
A *cult* classic.
# *BA DUM TSS!*
I'm trying to get into classical music,
but I can't find any original recordings. All the music is performed by cover bands.
Arnold Schwarzenegger gets a call from his agent...
Who tells him that an up-and-coming director is looking for German- and Austrian-born actors for a movie.
"It's a little different than the stuff you're known for," the agent says, "It's a period piece about classical music composers. Should I arrange an audition?"
"There is no need," Arnold says. "I'll be Bach."
what did the terminator say after deciding to learn classical music?
"I'll be bach"
What do you call someone lathering in the shower and singing along to Classical Music?
A soap opera
Alternate dimensions joke
A man learns how to go into alternate dimensions where he can become other people. He says "This is awesome, I've always wanted to be Arnold Schwarzenegger acting in the Terminator films, but I've also always wanted to compose classical music. So first, I'll be Bach"
"Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change me.
She got me to stop drinking, smoking and running around until all hours of the night. She taught me how to dress well, enjoy the fine arts, gourmet cooking, classical music, even how to invest in the stock market," said the man.
"Sounds like you may be bitter because she changed you so drastically," remarked his friend.
"I'm not bitter. Now that I'm so improved, she just isn't good enough for me."
What does Arnold Schwarzenegger dress up as for the classical music convention?
I'll be Bach .
I like listening to classic rock in the car and my wife likes listening to country music, so we compromise
and listen to country music.
I threw out my back listening to Classical music.
Now I have bad Bach pain.
Classical music is such a scam...
You pay hundreds of dollars to go see Mozart live and in concert, and every time it's just a cover band
The difference between gay men and straight men is the classical music they listen to.
Some like Debussy and some like the Bach
I've been trying to get my girlfriend into classical music but she just isn't interested.
I'm Baching up the wrong tree.
What is Vladimir Nabokov's favorite kind of classical music?
Pieces that are in A minor
I kinda stole this
The worst part about liking classical music is when you forget the name of a piece and you can't google the lyrics because there are none
⚠️ No Results For "there was a really good bit with a flute"
What does the chicken who likes classical music says?
Bach bach bach bach bach
Classical joke
I remember once in pre-virus times, I was standing in a fairly long line for a classical music concert. A dude on a skateboard rode up to me and asked what's all the excitement about? Who's playing? I told him Yo-Yo Ma. And he punched me in the face!
One for the classical music fans [OC]
For those who aren't, Herbert von Karajan was an acclaimed symphony conductor in the 20th century. You need to know that his name is pronounced approximately "KAHRY-on."
Not many people know it, but the maestro actually had a second career outside of music, he was a successful luggage designer.
I mean, surely you've heard of...Karajan Luggage?
A farmer bragged to his friend about his smart chickens
"How do you know they're smart?"
"They love classical music! That's smarty-pants music right there."
"And how do you know that's what they like?"
"Every morning, I say to the chickens 'What music for today?' and they ask for their favorite composer: 'Bach, Bach, Bach!'"
A solar panel, a wind turbine and a hydro dam are all getting to know each other.
'What kind of music are you into?' asks the dam.
'I'm into trance', replies the solar panel.
'Ooh, too intense for me', dam says, 'I much prefer classical melodies, maybe a little 60s soul at the weekends.'
'What about you Mr Turbine? What are you into?'
'Me?' He replies, 'I'm a huge metal fan.'
A simple music joke
What do you call a boy/girlfriend who loves Classical music?
Your Baethoven
The classical music field should get Bach to basics.
Because if it ain't Baroque , don't fix it.
Classic Rock and Roll Trivia
I learned today that 3 of the guys who performed on "Rosanna" and "Africa" also played on "Dust in the Wind". Music journalist asked them why they joined the new band and they said
"Toto? We aren't in Kansas anymore".
A guy is record shopping at a local music store…
and goes up to the clerk and says I'm looking for that classic 90s Seattle grunge sound on vinyl if you carry it. Clerk says reluctantly, I'm sorry the only styles we carry are children's, Christian, classical, or folk. The man looks puzzled and becomes a tad irate. He responds back saying, You mean to tell me that the only categories you carry here are children's, Christian, classical, or folk? The cashier looks at the guy and says, Well yeah, there's no alternative.
My dad owns 4 tents which he uses for camping
He uses all 4 at different times of the year, and each one is based on 1 of 4 different musical genres.
In spring he uses the jazz tent, in summer he uses the pop tent, in autumn he uses the classical tent….
But now is the winter of our disco tent.
Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger are talking about making a new film together.
Sly: I wanna show the world that we're more than just action movie stars. I wanna make a movie about classical music and classical composers. I know you guys love that stuff too. What do you think? Will you help me make a movie about it and show the world how cultured we are?
Bruce: I could play Beethoven. I've always wanted to play a tortured genius
Sly: You would be great. And I'll be Tchaikovsky. What about you Arnie?
Arnie: I'll be Bach
