Clapton Jokes

Following is our collection of mineshaft puns and friction one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Clapton jokes for adults, dirty physicist jokes and clean feynman dad gags for kids.

The Best Clapton Puns

What's the difference between a pound of cocaine and a baby?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a pound of coke fall out of a window

What's the difference between a baby and an ounce of Coke?

Eric Clapton would never drop an ounce of Coke out of a window

What's the difference between a 4 year old and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.



Too soon?

Why was Eric Clapton arrested?

He was fingering A minor.

What the difference between a dead baby and a bag of cocaine.

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of coke fall out of a window


Did you hear about the guy who got caught stealing electric guitars?

He was a Clapton maniac.

What is the difference between a bag of cocaine and a four year old?

Eric Clapton wouldn't drop a bag of cocaine out the window

What do Eric Clapton and Donald Trump have in common?

They were both jealous of the size of a black man's crowd.

Why does Eric Clapton prefer OSX?

...he was never a fan of having Windows open.

Why did Eric Clapton switch from PC to Mac?

He had a bad experience with windows.

Today it's his birthday so what's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a baby?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of the window.

Happy birthday Eric and sorry for the dark joke


What do Eric Clapton and coffee have in common?

They both suck without Cream.

I wonder if Eric Clapton really thought she looked wonderful...

or if it was just the 14th outfit she'd tried on and he didn't want to be late to the party.

What the difference between a toddler and a bag of coke?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of coke fall out the window #TearsInHeaven

What's the difference bnetween Eric Clapton and Michael Jackson?

MJ wouldn't let a kid fall out of the window

What's the difference between a toddler and a bag of heroin?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of heroin fall out a 53rd-floor window.

Do you know what the difference between an eightball of cocaine and a four year old child is?

Eric Clapton wouldn't have let an eightball of coke fall out of a 53rd story window.

What's the difference between Eric Clapton and a snooker player?

One plays with an electric guitar, the other a-cue-stick.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton never lost a bag of coke out the window.


Whats the difference between a bag of coke and a 3 yr old kid?

Eric Clapton wouldn't have let a bag of coke fall out a window

What did Eric Clapton say to Stevie ray Vaughan?

Are you coming with me or are you gonna crash here?

What's the difference between cocaine and a baby? (Apologies in advance)

Eric Clapton won't let cocaine fall out of a window....

Near-immediate

What do Eric Clapton and coffee have in common?

They're both a little bit better with Cream

Whats the difference between a young child and a bag of coke?

Theres no way that Eric Clapton would ever let his bag of coke fall out his window

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a toddler?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall off a balcony.

Eric Clapton and Paul Weller were going to take their bands on a reunion tour of the West Country

But they couldn't decide who should go on first.

Who's the most clapped rock star?

Eric CLAPton.

How much talent did the lead guitarist of Cream have?

A Clap-Ton.

What do you get when you cross Eric Clapton with Heinrich Himmler?

A classical gas chamber.

How many guitarists are needed to change a light bulb?

Five: one to change the bulb and the other four to tell him how Eric Clapton would do it.

Bonus: How many bass players are needed to change a light bulb?

Nobody cares

Alright guys lets make a thread about the sickest most twisted dark humour joke you've ever heard.

What's the difference between a small child and a bag of cocaine?
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Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.

Why does Eric Clapton only buy apple products

Because his son had a bad experience with windows

Eric Clapton Announced as new spokesperson Apple's music production suite Logic.

That guy sure hates Windows.

What's the difference between a four you old boy and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out of a 49th story window.

There is an abundance of elton jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 34 funniest jokes and clapton puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any clu witze you can hear about clapton.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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