Citizenship Jokes

Following is our collection of assessment puns and immigrant one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Citizenship jokes for adults, dirty identity jokes and clean welfare dad gags for kids.

The Best Citizenship Puns

I was applying for Australian citizenship and the interviewer asked, Do you have a criminal record?

I said, No. Is that still required?

Trump, Merkel and Kim Jong-un are in the Middle East being chased by ISIS:

Trump turns to them and shouts: "Stop chasing us and I'll pay you a million dollars!" The terrorists continued.

Then Merkel turns to them and shouts: "Stop chasing us and I'll give you German citizenship!" The terrorists still kept chasing.

Then Kim Jong-un turns and shouts: "You are about to cross the border into the People's Democratic Republic of Korea. Welcome!"

The terrorists screamed and turned to run away.

I just passed by Canadian citizenship test!

I got an eh +

A man is applying for Australian citizenship when the clerk asks "Do you have a criminal record?"

"No" the man says. "Is that still required?"

I was applying for citizenship in Australia, and the interviewer asked, "Do you have a criminal background".

I replied, "No, is that still a requirement".


two foreigners in america are applying for citizenship

They're lined up outside the Citizenship and immigration office, along with many others, not wanting to risk deportation now that Trump is in office.

>Guy #1: I've had enough of this waiting, save my place, I'm going to shoot Donald Trump myself.

several hours later he returns.

>Guy #2: well? did you get him?

>Guy #1: no, The line for that was even longer than the one here.

Did you hear about the French fencer who frequently spent time in the USA for competitions?

He eventually applied for duel citizenship.

A man goes to apply for Finnish citizenship.

A man goes to apply for Finnish citizenship. He says to the employee, I want to be a citizen of Finland. The employee responds in broken English.
Employee: You nice?
Man: Um... I suppose so.
Back of line.
What's the problem?
Nice guys Finnish last.

My friend from Prague finally got his US citizenship approved...

He is a cancelled Czech now.

Three chinese men applied for citizenship in USA

They were accepted on the condition that they changed their names.

Bu became Buck.
Chu became Chuck.
And Fu went back to China.

I heard you didn't pass your Australian citizenship test...

Didgeridoo it?


I was applying for Australian citizenship, and the guy asks me "have you ever been convicted of a felony?"

"Does stealing a joke count?" I asked.

I applied to a citizen of Finland

In the online application there was an odd question. "Are you a nice guy", it said, I thought it was an odd question but I clicked yes. Immediately I was directed to a page saying I was directed to the back of the queue for citizenship, I was confused but I read later in the application and it said. "Nice guys, Finnish last".

Can one get Slovenian citizenship through a spouse?

Asking for a President.

The most confusing dual citizenship?

French and Spanish, because then you have to decide between being on strike and unemployed.

American

A man from Israel got his citizenship, I guess you could say he Israeli American now

I applied for Chinese citizenship

But I forgot to go to orientation

Why was The Joker's US Passport application denied?

Passports require proof of US citizenship and The Joker is a fictional character.

My mother-in-law is so ugly . . .

She entered the Miss America pageant and almost lost her citizenship!


It's okay if white people invade Mexico illegally, only speaking English, taking jobs, bringing gangs, rape and drugs while demand citizenship?

That is the Politically Correct thing to do.

When you apply for American citizenship...

When you apply for American citizenship, you have to write a short paper about yourself. Or in other words,

A you essay

If I ever got citizenship to Switzerland, I'd go straight to Turkey...

I'd finally be in Turkey *and* Swiss.

There is an abundance of nationality jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 22 funniest jokes and citizenship puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any immigrate witze you can hear about citizenship.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes