Circus Jokes
168 circus jokes and hilarious circus puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about circus that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Who doesn't love a good laugh? Get your clown nose ready for these hilarious circus jokes. Read this article for some of the funniest circus jokes that involve clowns, circus acts, circus kids, Rockettes, tents and more. So don your clown costume and let's get this circus started!
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Funniest Circus Short Jokes
Short circus jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The circus humour may include short carnival jokes also.
- A dog walks into a bar The dog says, "Gimme a beer." The bartender says, "Wow! You can talk! You should get a job at the circus!" The dog says, "They're hiring electricians at the circus?"
- What's the difference between a sorority and a circus? A circus is a cunning array of stunts...
- So the human cannonball decided to quit his job at the circus... The ringmaster said "Please, no you can't! We'll never be able to find another man of your caliber!"
- My circus hired what has to be the world's worst human cannon ball. Unfortunately he's unionised so we can't even fire him.
- In a tragic accident, the circus' human cannonball was killed today. When asked if he will find a replacement, the Ringmaster responded, "Where will I ever find another man of his caliber?"
- He was the best human cannonball the circus ever had. You seldom meet a man of his caliber.
- Why did the robber go to the circus? To steal the show. This joke was brought to you by my 2nd grade daughter. ;)
- Why did the "Ringling Bros." Circus finally go out of business? They couldn't compete with the circus in Washington DC any longer.
- The human cannonball informs the circus manager that he plans to retire at the end of season. The distraught manager protests "Where am I going to find another employee of your caliber?"
- Do you know why, all around the world, parlaments' roof are built as a dome? Have you ever seen a circus with a flat roof?
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Circus One Liners
Which circus one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with circus? I can suggest the ones about theatre and clown.
- Fifty clowns got fired from the circus. Luckily, it freed up three parking spots.
- What do you call an elephant the circus no longer needs? Irrelephant.
- I used to work at the circus I was a human cannonball until they fired me.
- How do you build a flea circus? You have to start from scratch.
- I feel sorry for my circus friend, the human cannonball He just got fired
- Why didn't the clown get the job at the circus? He just wasn't It.
- Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense
- Did you hear about the protestors killing the circus? They went straight for the juggler.
- Did you hear about the dog who went to the flea circus? He stole the show.
- Why did the vampire join the circus? To become an acrobat.
- What planet is like a circus? Saturn, it has three rings.
- What's the action like at a circus? In-tents.
- Did you hear about the fire at the circus? It was in tents!
- They had to close the circus There was a freak accident
- Why don't the circus lions eat the clowns? They taste funny!
Circus Clown Jokes
Here is a list of funny circus clown jokes and even better circus clown puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- It's not true that air travel has become a circus. Circuses may feature the same level of animal cruelty, sadness and clowns as air travel, but circuses actually start on time.
- My friend is an unemployed circus clown. We nicknamed him Pennywise. His career is in the gutter.
- What's one unique thing about Trump's appearance in NYC this week? It's the only circus where an elephant is also the clown.
- "Look Dad! The clowns are leaving the circus to go get food!" "Son how many times do I have to tell you? Those are called *Senators* leaving the *Capitol*"
- My dad, grandad, great grandad and great great grandad were all circus clowns. Not something I ever wanted to do. Their shoes were just too big to fill.
- A clown at the circus gave me some free popcorn. That was a very kind jester.
- Circus stocks are up Because the clowns sure are making a killing.
- A clown was killed today after his baggy suit caught on the wheels of a passing truck; Newspapers report he was simply a victim of circus pants.
- I found out why the Ringling Brothers Circus closed down. All the clowns moved to Washington D.C.
- what happens to a clown at birth? circus-ision
Circus Elephant Jokes
Here is a list of funny circus elephant jokes and even better circus elephant puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Two clowns were crying near the circus A passer-by asks them why are they crying.
"Well, the elephant has died"
"And you loved him so much?"
"No, but they've put us to dig his grave" - Why did the Elephant Man quit the circus? Because they were paying him peanuts!
Making my way out now... - Why did the circus animals go on strike? The elephants found out that they were being paid peanuts compared to the rest of the troupe and the ringleader was taking the lions share.
- I don't support elephants in the circus They are just too heavy.
- Why didn't anyone care about the circus? Because it was irr-elephant
Circus Performer Jokes
Here is a list of funny circus performer jokes and even better circus performer puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do performing bears at the circus get for lunch? 30 minutes.
- The difference between watching a three ring circus, and going to New York to watch a performance by the Rockettes. Well, when you watch a three ring circus, you witness a cunning array of stunts...
- Did you hear about the circus performance gone wrong? The lion tamer was mauled, it was in tents.
- What do you get when you cross a well endowed lady and a circus performer? A Juggler.
- I once had my very own flee circus It was pretty cool until all the performers left in the middle of the show :(
- Why did people laugh when the circus performer tripped on the sidewalk? because it was funny
Circus Act Jokes
Here is a list of funny circus act jokes and even better circus act puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Did you hear about the lion who killed a man during a circus act? He went straight for the juggler.
- In a circus "Daddy, they said death-defying act, but why then nobody actually died?
Daddy?
Daddy!"
Circus Kid Jokes
Here is a list of funny circus kid jokes and even better circus kid puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Kid: "Dad, will you take me to the circus?" Dad: "No, son. If anyone wants to see you let them come to the house."
- How do you spot the violent kids at the circus? They go straight for the juggler.
- A boy runs to his mom and asks: "Mom, mom! Can we go the the circus?" His mom answers: "No, kid. People should come over if they want to see you."
Happy Circus Jokes for a Lighthearted Night with Friends
What funny jokes about circus you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean carnival ride jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make circus pranks.
There's a shiner circus today in town today,
Seems more like a fez-tival to me.
That's nothing
A father, mother and a small kid go to see a circus. There, among many animals the kid sees the elephant and its long thing hanging between his legs. The kid asks dad "What's that". Ashamed to answer, father says "Ask mother".
The kid asks mom, and she too is ashamed and says, "Oh, that's nothing". The kid goes back to father, and father asks, "What did mom say". Kid says she told "That's nothing".
Father replies sighing, "Yeah for your mother even that's nothing".
Traveling Circus
A circus stopped in a small town. An elephant escaped and found its way into an old woman's garden. Not recognizing the beast, she frantically called the sheriff. "Sherrif, there's an enormous awful beast in my garden, and it's pulling up my petunias with its tail". "Oh?" said the sheriff. "and what is it doing with the petunias?". "Sheriff, if I told you, you'd never believe me!"
A pig that can speak French
A circus advertises a new act: a pig that can speak French. A trainer walks onto the stage carrying a small pig with a blue ribbon and a wooden mallet. The trainer asks, "Parlez-vous français?" and hits the pig with the mallet. The pig: "Ouiiii..."
A man looking for work
A man was looking for work. In fact, he was desperate. He heard the circus was in town and so he went and asked the ring master if there was a job for him. The ring master said, "We're lucky you showed up! Our tiger just died and he was a big part of the show. What we need you to do is put on this tiger costume and pretend to be a real tiger. Nobody will know the difference." So the man put on the tiger costume, and he had to admit, it was a very realistic costume. Soon the show started, and the time came for the tiger act. The man, eager to do a good job, lept out into the ring, snarling just like a real tiger. The crowd cheered. He did all the things the tiger was supposed to do: let the trainer stick his head in his mouth, balanced on a ball, and finally walked across a tightrope. The crowd loved it. But then a lion and a bear entered the ring. The ring master announced, "Now you will see these three ferocious beasts enter one cage together!" The man had no choice as he was herded into the cage with the lion and the bear. The two animals roared and snarled, and the man became afraid for his life. He began running around the cage, shouting, "Let me out! I'm not a real tiger! Help!" Then the lion grabbed him and said, "Shut up! Do you want us all to lose our jobs?"
A man goes up to the leader of a circus
A man goes up to the circus, and says to the leader of the circus "I can do great bird impressions." The leader of the circus says "That's nothing special, lots of people can do great bird impressions, so get out of here"
The man says "ok" and flies away.
A dog goes into a hardware store...
...and says: I'd like a job please . The hardware store owner says: We don't hire talking dogs, why don't you go join the circus? The dog replies: What would the circus want with a plumber .
-Steven Alan Green
Did you hear about the little psychic that escaped from the circus?
It's a small medium at large.
HELP? I need help remembering a joke. Is it ok to ask this here?
There was a joke about a guy being pulled over saying he was a clown late for the circus, then he took out road flares to juggle to prove to the cop he was a clown, then maybe somebody else drove by or something... does this sound familiar to anyone?
What's the difference between a brothel and a circus?
Your mother never ran away to join the circus.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Say you're being attacked by a circus mob. What's the best strategy?
Go for the juggler.
George W. G. Ferris Jr. designed and constructed the first Ferris Wheel. He saw much potential in his new invention, he said, "This will revolutionise circus attractions!"
A horse walks into a bar
A horse walks into a bar and says "bartender, scotch on the rocks please!"
The bartender, rubbing his eyes in disbelief says "did.. did you just talk?!"
"Yes I have, why?" Said the horse
"It's just, incredible! I've never seen a talking horse! You know, you should really go talk to the local circus, they would LOVE to have someone with your skills!"
The horse replied "why? Are they short on electricians?"
Did you hear about the knife-wielding madman who attacked a circus camp the other day?
He went straight for the juggler.
Did you hear about the vampire at the circus?
He went straight for the juggler
What do you call a circus full of mean people?
A jerkus.
An elephant escaped from the circus...
...and ended up in a little old lady's back garden. The lady had never seen an elephant before, so she rang the police.
"Please come quickly," she said to the policeman who answered the phone. "There's a strange looking animal in my garden picking up cabbages with its tail."
"What's it doing with them?" asked the policeman.
"If I told you," said the old lady, "you'd never beleive me!"
What do you get when you cross a duck and a pig?
A media circus that focuses on the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.
How do you ruin a circus?
Go for the Juggler
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a pub for l**... in circus outfits?
A Clown-d**...-Bar
A boy goes to the circus
and one of the sideshows is a tent that says "Man Who Remembers Everything." Intrigued, the boy goes inside and sees an old Native American man sitting on the ground. He approaches the man and asks, "If you remember everything, what did you have for breakfast exactly three weeks ago?"
Without hesitation, the man responds, "Eggs." The boy is sufficiently impressed and leaves to enjoy the rest of the circus.
Many years later, the boy has grown up, gotten married, and had children. One day he takes his family to the circus and is shocked to see the Man Who Remembers Everything is still there. He brings his family into the tent, and there is the same old man sitting on the ground.
Excited to see the old man again, he walks up and greets him, "How!"
The old man looks into his eyes and replies, "Scrambled."
Bernie Sanders walks into a bar.
The bartender looks over and says "Mr. Sanders! Drinks on me. I really hope you win. Imagine another Clinton in the White House? It would be a circus!"
Bernie replies "Bill didn't run a circus, he ran affaire!"
My friend says he's got a psychic duck
He's got it all dressed up like a gypsy in a little circus tent in his house.
What are you on? I said to him.
Quack said the duck.
I am the big shot at my new job.
I am the human cannonball at the circus.
I went to a black circus
It was the greatest show on Erf
Me and the other guys from the circus....
... took a night off to see some stand-up comedy but he was really mean and cutting.
He went straight for the juggler.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My departed uncle was a circus clown before he passed
I remember all his friends came to the f**....
In the same car.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
OC: My wife recently caught me receiving a hand-job from a circus soothsayer.
It was truly a s**... of Miss Fortune.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between the Circus and the p**... Mansion?
The Circus features a cunning array of stunts.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What is another difference between a circus and a w**...?
My husband doesn't go to the circus
My brother's in the circus - he gets £500 a week for swallowing a four-foot sword.
What's so good about swallowing a four-foot sword? He's only three feet tall.
Why dont Egyptian Chefs do well in the circus?
They always fal-afel off the tight rope.
It's friday the 13th and there's a serial killer at the circus
He's freaking in tents.
Dave worked at a circus school...
Normally, he teaches kids how to juggle or do cartwheels but it wasn't all that interesting.
One day, he decides to teach the kids something a bit more exciting so he brought in a cannon.
Long story short - he was fired.
Ringling Bros. circus introduces the first female ringleader in 134 years!
And now they're going out of business.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did Ringling Brothers shut down the circus?
Because with Trump as president their clowns couldn't compete.
Did you hear Barnum and Bailey Circus is shutting down?
They can't compete with American politics.
Did you know that the number of legs in the air of a horse statue indicate how its rider died?
If there are no legs in the air, the rider survived the war.
If there is one leg in the air, the rider was mortally wounded and died after a battle.
If there are two legs in the air, the rider was killed in battle.
If there are three legs in the air, the rider died in a tragic circus accident.
If there are four legs in the air, the rider was abducted by aliens and died in space.
I heard the Ringling Bros Circus is staying in business
They plan to stick around for another four years under the name "Trump Administration"
Did you hear why the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus shut down?
Because the Trump administration is now the greatest show on earth!
Frank the Human Cannonball retired yesterday and has yet to be replaced...
The circus owner said, "It's hard to find another man of that caliber."
My wife applied for the bearded woman circus attraction
I explained the position requires her to be a woman
I once knew a guy who tried being in a small circus playing the musical saw for a little while.
But in the end, he didn't make the cut.
I heard the Ringling Circus is shutting down this year
I guess they didn't want to compete with the White House.
Everyone jokes about running away and joining the circus. But I hear they have a great 401K program and competitive benefits.
Too bad the pay is peanuts.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between an Italian barber and an angry circus ringmaster?
Ones a shaving roman and the others a raving showman.
A circus performer is pulled over for speeding.
As the officer is writing the ticket, he notices several machetes in the back seat of the car.
What are those for? he asks suspiciously.
I'm a juggler, the driver replies. I use those in my act.
Well, show me, the officer demands.
So the juggler gets out and starts juggling: one, two, three, four, and finally seven machetes at one time. He does overhand, underhand, and behind the back.
Another car passes by. The driver does a double take and says: My God, if that's the test they're giving now, I've got to give up drinking!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Circus needed a new act...
there were 2 performers gunning for the opportunity: a beatiful woman and a man badly dressed.
The woman started her act, which was lion taming: she stripped stark n**..., entered the lion´s cage, and made the beast postrate and lick her entire body, from head to toes.
The ringmaster was impressed, and asked the other performer:
"Can you do better than that?"
"Yes, and I dont even need to be whipped"
I asked Dumbo what career options he would pursue, when the circus shut down, and if he would consider interesting opportunities
He said, "I don't know, but I'm all ears"
State of Emergency: Circus Fire Rages in Texas, Deadlier than Hurricane Harvey
Everyone died
Jk it was intense (in tents)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I read recently that lion at the circus ate its tamer.
It was a true carnie-vore.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a nightclub that caters specifically to lesbian circus performers?
A clown-d**... bar.
The circus reviews are in
The critics are saying that it is in tents
Why are circus animals so much more exciting than zoo animals?
Becuase they are in tents.
The Moscow State Circus are sad to announce...
The passing of their Human Cannonball.
A spokesman said they hoped that one day they might be able to find a replacement, but aren't sure they'll ever find another man of his calibre.
A talking duck walks into a bar
He walks up and orders a shot of whiskey because he's depressed. The bartender looks at him gobsmacked because he's a talking duck and then asks why he's sad.
The duck says I just lost my job
The bartender replies well don't be sad I know just the perfect place you can apply. The circus has just pulled into town
The duck replies what would a circus want with a plasterer?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Chancellor of Germany, Prince Harry's wife, and the actor who played Gollum should set up an emporium of p**... wigs in Sarkel, Russia
...and call it "Merkel, Markle and Serkis' Sarkel Merkin Circus"
Little Johnny asks his Dad to take him to the circus...
Dad: Don't be silly Little Johnny. No need to go to the circus when people can come here to see you
