The Best 34 Circumstances Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Circumstances jokes. There are some circumstances duress jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these circumstances scenario puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Circumstances Jokes and Puns
"Alright guys, we have lots of pictures to mount before the art gallery tonight. Like I said in the email, we'll have to use these adhesive hooks. Under no circumstances will you penetrate the wall with nails or screws. Tim, I've noticed you've already hung one picture. Great job.
Tim (hiding his drill and muttering under his breath): welp.. I screwed that up.
My church was going to have a sermon on prophecy today...
but it was cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.
3 old ladies go to a baseball game with a bottle of liquor. They finish the bottle...what inning is it and what are the circumstances on the field?
Bottom of the fifth and all the bags are loaded.
Unfortunately, this month's Psychics Club meeting is cancelled...
... due to unforeseen circumstances.
A salesman's car breaks down
A traveling salesman's car breaks down near an Ohio farmhouse. The salesman knocks on the door and explains his situation to the farmer.
"Well," the farmer says, "Its Friday night, I doubt you can get a tow into town tonight, so I'll let you stay the night. I have only one rule, under no circumstances are you to have sex with my son."
"I'm sorry," says the salesman. "I'm in the wrong joke."
I wonder if the views of a color blind person depend on the circumstances of the scenario
Or if they just see the world in black and white.
I'm going to set up my own religion!
I'm going to set up my own religion, one where its important to respect other peoples beliefs, learn to take criticism on the chin like an adult, wash regularly, treat women and children as equals and never kill anyone under any circumstances.
Its a non-prophet organisation.
After the death of Bobbi Kristina Brown in similar circumstances to her mother Whitney Houston...
The family have released an online video to commemorate their lives.
"Two Girls, One Tub" was probably not the best idea for a title.
Why was the paranormal convention cancelled?
Due to unforseen circumstances
My local psychic closed down...
..due to unforeseen circumstances
Whats the law that states...
Whats the law that states under the perfect circumstances any joke can be funny
You can explore circumstances disgustedly reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean circumstances harm dad jokes. There are also circumstances puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
We're sorry, but the "blind people rejoice" meeting has been postponed,
Due to unforeseen circumstances.
I'm pretty sure God is a Black Woman
Who else would be a single parent whose Son was killed by the authorities under suspicious circumstances?
I had to attend a seminar for psychics and fortune-tellers.
Unfortunately, it has been canceled due to unforeseen circumstances.
Psychic convention cancelled ...
... due to unforeseen circumstances
A solar eclipse is like watching a woman breastfeed in public
It's beautiful, it's free, but under no circumstances should you look at it.
Why is the key next to the space bar on Trump's keyboard always in pristine condition?
Because no matter the circumstances, he'll never put pressure on the alt-right
A psychic talk show was cancelled
Due to unforseen circumstances.
I was going to go to the Psychics Conference.
But it was closed due to unforeseen circumstances.
The farmer died under mysterious circumstances...
Police suspect fowl play
Hey, dad.
"Dad, is there a word to describe answers that are completely correct but entirely useless under the circumstances?"
"Yes, son, yes there is."
A man is caught feasting on a Bald Eagle by a park ranger.
He is taken to court and the judge asks him why he committed this crime.
The man replies I had no other choice and this was my only way of survival.
Given the circumstances, the judge decides that this man is telling the truth and let's him off the case. But being curious, the judge asks Well, how did it taste like?
The man replied Have you ever had Spotted Owl?
An illustrator was found dead in his house
The investigation found his death to be in sketchy circumstances.
Today's meeting for visually impaired psychics
has been cancelled...
due to unforeseen circumstances.
We assure you this issue will be **raised** in our next newsletter.
My first job was as a fortune teller.
I had to quit due to unforeseen circumstances.
I think that the nuclear launch codes should be kept in the hands of women, and those codes should also represent the number of sexual partners they have had.
That way they will never give up the real numbers under any circumstances.
Psychic Prediction Convention 2018
[CLOSED] Due to unforeseen circumstances.
This just in. A truck full of wigs has crashed under mysterious circumstances.
Police are now combing the area.
Her: If you hear something in the woods, you tell me. if you hear something in the water, you tell me. But under no circumstances are you allowed to take off your blindfold.
Him: All this just because you forgot to pack your makeup for our camping trip?
I was born in very sorry circumstances.
My mother was sorry and my father was sorry as well.
It's such a shame about tomorrow's session on Prophecies
It got cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.
Under what circumstances does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle
I wasn't sure if I should post this here, because it's only funny under certain circumstances
certain circumstances
funny
My printer died last night under suspicious circumstances.
Epson didn't kill itself.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the circumstances communications jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working circumstances confer piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.