The man sitting next to him looks over and says, "Eating that many chocolate bars is bad for you."
The boy looks over and responds, "My great grandfather lived to be one hundred and five".
The man replies, "And he ate that much chocolate?"
"No" says the boy, "But he minded his own fucking business."
​
The man sitting next to him looks over and says, "Eating that many chocolate bars is bad for you."
The boy looks over and responds, "My great grandfather lived to be one hundred and five".
The man replies, "And he ate that much chocolate?"
"No" says the boy, "he minded his own fucking business."
Kidnapper: [on phone] we have your son.
Wife: actually I'm holding my son.
Kidnapper: [getting frustrated] then who the heck just asked for chocolate milk with a straw and made us cut the crust off his PB&J?
Wife: oh god.
Kidnapper: what?
Wife. you have my husband.
They'll kill your dog
Taxi driver: Son, don't eat chocolate cause it's not healthy!
Guy: My grandfather lived 108 years.
Taxi driver: Eating chocolate?
Guy: No, minding his own business.
"Oh, really? Did *he* eat a lot of chocolate?"
"No, he minded his own damn business."
For shits and giggles.
The man sitting next to him looks over and says, "Eating that many chocolate bars is bad for you." The boy looks over and responds, "My great grandfather lived to be one hundred and five". The man replies, "And he ate that much chocolate?"
"No" says the boy, "he minded his own fucking business."
A chocolate shake.
Man : If you eat chocolates young lad, you will spoil your teeth.
Boy : My grandfather lived 110 years.
Man : By eating chocolate?
Boy : No. By minding his own business.
He walks into the kitchen and asks his mom,
"Mom, may I please have a piece of chocolate?"
"You know the rule: No arms, no chocolate." She replies.
As the boy begins to cry the mother says,
"Oh, I'm just kidding! Here, catch!"
They actually believe I've got chocolate in my van
Taxi driver: Son, don't eat chocolate cause it's not healthy!
Kid: My grandfather lived 108 years.
Taxi driver: Eating chocolate?
Kid: No, minding his own business.
So that it'll fit inside the box.
and sitting next to him is a small boy eating chocolate bar after chocolate bar. The man turns to him and says, "It's probably not that healthy to eat so much chocolate." The boy stares at the man and eats another piece of chocolate. After swallowing, the boy says, "My grandfather lived to be 110 years old." The man asks, "How did he do that? Did he eat a lot of chocolate too?" The boy replies with, "No, he minded his own fucking business."
After she did it, I proceeded to eat it explaining that chocolate wasn't good for dogs.
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.
At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: 'Take only ONE . God is watching.'
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples
Cacao
A boy was sitting in a park eating a bar of chocolate. After finishing it, he opened another one and started eating that too. Then the man sitting next to him said
"Do you know that you're damaging your teeth there son?"
"My grandfather lived for a 132 years" the boy replied.
"Was it because of eating chocolate?" the man asked curiously
"No. He knew how to mind his own business."
"What are you eating?"
"A chocolate cake"
"Why does it smell like shit then?"
"I'm eating it for the third time"
Did you hear about the Chinese Magican who did magic with Chocolate?
I heard he had loads of Twix up his sleeve.
Everyone got a piece
The local youths used to cover me in chocolate and cream, then put a cherry on my head. Life was tough in the gateau.
Experts on site identified the mummy as Pharaoh Roche.
I recently had an affair with a jar of chocolate spread ..... If you see my wife, you better Nutella
An old lady always gave the bus conductor cashew nuts and almonds to eat.
Conductor: "So kind of you to give me those nuts to eat everyday. Why don't you eat them yourself?"
Old Lady: "I don't have the teeth to munch them."
Conductor: "Then why do you buy them?"
Old Lady: "I just love the chocolate around them!" :P :P :P
There is a new machine at the gym. It's truly awesome! I almost puked after an hour, it really has it all.
Cookies, chocolate bars, chips, sodas.
I guess there is life on Mars after all.
Boy: If you let me kiss you, I'll give you a piece of chocolate.
Girl: Okay.
Boy: If you let me touch your boobs, you'll get another piece of chocolate.
Girl: Okay!
Boy: If you let me touch your pussy, you'll get another one.
Girl: You know what? At this rate, I'll have diabetes by the time we finally fuck!
(translated from German)
So black kids could get dirty faces too.
They believe it to be Pharaoh Rocher.
They don't last long for fat people.
Cacao!
They'll kill your dog.
Turns out it's a dog, not a place. Bummer.
Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Chocolate? Well, here are the best Chocolate dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Chocolate pick up lines to share with friends.